tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18423680379764535722024-02-02T15:44:22.134-08:00Shine10toshinehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12263916978396798526noreply@blogger.comBlogger41125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1842368037976453572.post-17063100839704859772019-04-13T12:19:00.001-07:002019-04-13T12:19:11.762-07:00Passing on the wine: is it too much to expect 40 years’ worth of wine to be eradicated in four months?<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhgivkxMOvsB4Jy7IndKlmKCJ33sCU8TwzvZRA68IO65aB68ixXL5R4pxUbC6403Xxj8W_TZjXnbZ0LhIaQAqDCh1ar-9_vRo0XX4ALHPV8csw-MrRJ8nppfVeT4KSJ31gTSrMvKpRJlk8/s1600/phone+725+%25282%2529.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1593" data-original-width="1600" height="318" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhgivkxMOvsB4Jy7IndKlmKCJ33sCU8TwzvZRA68IO65aB68ixXL5R4pxUbC6403Xxj8W_TZjXnbZ0LhIaQAqDCh1ar-9_vRo0XX4ALHPV8csw-MrRJ8nppfVeT4KSJ31gTSrMvKpRJlk8/s320/phone+725+%25282%2529.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Water never tasted so good...honestly</td></tr>
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Welcome to month four of sobriety. If you had asked me back
in January I would have told you that I’d stopped drinking alcohol – which in
my case amounted to red wine as I didn’t really drink anything else - <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>for a year to see how it felt because…well
just to see if I could.<o:p></o:p></div>
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If you had asked me if I had a drink problem I would have
said no. I regularly had a month off. I occasionally didn’t drink every day. I
only drank red wine because I loved the taste. I didn’t drink in the morning. I
didn’t often have a hangover. I hardly ever embarrassed myself because I was
drunk. I couldn’t remember the last time I drank to oblivion. I didn’t put myself
in dangerous drunken situations. I have never been at the wheel of a car after
a drink. I hadn’t angrily thrown stuff after a bottle of wine for years.<o:p></o:p></div>
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I didn’t find it difficult to give up daily red wine
drinking in January, with so many others doing dry January it is almost
expected. I have done it before and always been disappointed not to feel any
great improvements; no weight-loss; no better sleep; no more bounce. I have
always noticed that without wine I crave sugar so it was no surprise that I substituted
wine with chocolate, cakes and biscuits.<o:p></o:p></div>
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By February most friends were having after-work-drinks whilst
I was still on a pint of lime and soda. I noticed that I was irritable, snappy
and negative. I couldn’t bring myself to socialise, wanted to go to bed at 8 pm
and was seriously annoyed that I wasn’t feeling fabulous. What on earth was the
point of abstaining if I couldn’t find any positive benefits?<o:p></o:p></div>
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In March I was at the base of the stress-dip that accompanies
the rhythm of publishing a quarterly magazine. I had got through the January
deadline but this was tougher. At the end of particularly difficult days I really
wanted a bottle of wine; I wasn’t sure I had the willpower, how else was I
going to deal with the pressure? And I still hadn’t lost any weight, was still waking
up at 3 am, hated going out at night; what on earth was the point? But I am the
kind of person that when I say I am going to do something I stick to it. I had
said I was doing this for a year and so I would.<o:p></o:p></div>
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Last night - a Friday - I went to a Yoga class at 7pm. It
has been another long work week, in the past a Friday would most certainly have
involved wine. As I left the yoga studio I walked past bars full of happy Friday
evening drinkers: Friends, colleagues, lovers, families, chatting, enjoying each
other’s company, sharing gossip and news over wine, beer or cocktails. I
started to cry. I can’t ever recall feeling so lonely. <o:p></o:p></div>
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Not drinking has forced me to look hard at myself and my
relationship not only to alcohol but to other people in my life, to my past, my
other habits; to how drinking has shaped the person I am at 54 after 40 years
of loving to drink. I have started to question what it would take to label myself
an alcoholic. In the past my definition of that would have been to do with the amount of alcohol consumed, the inability to control one’s drinking and the behavioural
changes that being addicted to alcohol induced. I tell myself that I don’t have
a drink problem and yet I have problems that alcohol seems to be the only solution
to; without the soothing effect a drink brings about I feel as if I have been stripped
of my protective armour. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And facing up
to this isn’t easy; giving up wine has meant that I have had to give up parts of my identity.<o:p></o:p></div>
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On that journey home last night I wondered how different my
life would have been if I had discovered that I could tolerate uncomfortable
situations without a drink. Or even, take myself out of those situations rather than drinking to survive them. At fourteen I had learnt that the fear of
being in dangerous places – hanging out with older cool types who took drugs
and thought nothing of having sex in front of me – could be eased with Lambrusco.
By sixteen I was brave enough to sleep with anyone who gave me a modicum of
attention as long as I had already imbibed a couple of glasses of wine. Like many
girls I didn’t consider I could use the term rape because I had bought it on
myself by being drunk; a night out involving wine but ending with me saying no
and locking my door didn’t stop him shimmying a drainpipe and climbing into my
bedroom window, but hey that couldn’t be rape could it because, although I was
bruised from him holding me down, I had been drinking and flirting with him all
night in a club?<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><o:p></o:p></b></div>
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And then there were the times when wine enabled me to confidently
dance on tables, fall in love and tolerate idiots. And how wine had subdued my opinions
so I didn’t stand out: “have a drink and shut up.” <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And the family occasions where drink enabled
me to feel loved. Or were wine smoothed the way to connections….the list goes on.
Good and Bad.<o:p></o:p></div>
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I wish that I hadn’t drunk so much in front of my daughters.
I wish that I had realised that drinking was a choice. I wish that I had said “fuck
off” to those telling me that without wine I was boring, or that I was an
outsider who was even weirder without a drink. I wish I had been stronger
younger. I wish I could go back and provide protection to that child who
started drinking because she wanted to be accepted, loved and didn’t want to be
scared anymore. <o:p></o:p></div>
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These are all thoughts I wish I wasn’t having and I can’t
have a glass of wine to push them away. I tell myself that I am proud to have got
to month four, that I have more energy, my brain is sharper, I am a better person
for facing my demons. It doesn’t erase the painful emotions that bubble just
below the surface and threaten to spill over as once more I am on the outside
looking in. <o:p></o:p></div>
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In some respects the child I was at fourteen had merely been
numbed with alcohol for the past forty years. She was waiting for sobriety to
re-emerge; vulnerable, uncertain, insecure; a bundle of troubled emotions. So
how can I support her? I don’t want or need to drink, so I need a new way to
be. I had no idea that the prop was actually scaffolding. <o:p></o:p></div>
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I don’t want to come across as negative; I know that this
was – is – a good idea. I know that I will come through this year with greater
self-knowledge. The current mental space, where I regret my past reliance on alcohol,
I am upset with the choices I made and am cross that I probably could have been an unbelievably successful woman if I hadn’t let wine take away my personal power, will pass. Nonetheless, I am excited that it isn’t too late to
change – it never is – and I’m not too old to take on the world stone-cold-sober. So bring on the next four months, I am ready for anything as long as I have a stash of chocolate biscuits.<o:p></o:p></div>
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<br />10toshinehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12263916978396798526noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1842368037976453572.post-8711791875365503902017-07-27T10:36:00.000-07:002017-07-27T10:36:55.683-07:00Gold Boots, Conversations & Circles of Influence.<div class="MsoNormal">
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Photo by <a href="http://unsplash.com/photos/Ny1vyUgidMg?utm_source=unsplash&utm_medium=referral&utm_content=creditCopyText" style="background-color: #f2f2f2; box-sizing: border-box; color: #999999; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "San Francisco", "Helvetica Neue", Helvetica, Ubuntu, Roboto, Noto, "Segoe UI", Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: start; text-decoration-skip: ink; transition: color 0.2s ease-in-out, opacity 0.2s ease-in-out; white-space: nowrap;">Daiga Ellaby</a><span style="background-color: #f2f2f2; color: #111111; font-family: , "blinkmacsystemfont" , "san francisco" , "helvetica neue" , "helvetica" , "ubuntu" , "roboto" , "noto" , "segoe ui" , "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 14px; white-space: nowrap;"> on </span><a href="https://unsplash.com/?utm_source=unsplash&utm_medium=referral&utm_content=creditCopyText" style="background-color: #f2f2f2; box-sizing: border-box; color: #999999; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "San Francisco", "Helvetica Neue", Helvetica, Ubuntu, Roboto, Noto, "Segoe UI", Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: start; text-decoration-skip: ink; transition: color 0.2s ease-in-out, opacity 0.2s ease-in-out; white-space: nowrap;">Unsplash</a></td></tr>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">I had a lovely chance encounter yesterday. I was on my way to the station and a Daddy and young child were walking towards me. As we came close the Dad remarked that I had set him a task as his young daughter was very impressed by my gold boots and wanted a pair of her own. I stopped to chat and shared my thoughts. Now, this isn’t unusual for me, my footwear often instigates conversation; I encounter daily micro-moments of connectivity based on comments around how I dress. This little girl was looking longingly at my shiny boots and I wondered if her dad would consider letting her paint her Wellington boots – she had them on – and make her own gold boots without having to buy new ones.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">I was imagining a lovely afternoon of messy-play, luckily this dad also thought it was a good idea, we discussed whether gold acrylic would be suitable, and he commented how excited Mummy would be when she came home from work. I went on my way and hopefully, there is a happy little girl splashing in puddles today in gold-wellies.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">This dialogue got me thinking about how we introduce children to the concept of sustainable fashion, how we make it relevant to them in a way that is fun, and how we can encourage creativity and play into dressing that is good for children’s well-being.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">At a presentation of my research into the possible benefits of everyday dress the Q and A turned to uniforms and the fragile identity formation of teenagers; I believe that we should be encouraging children to develop identities based on self-knowledge and expressing who they are, or want to be, with a creative approach to dress rather than being channelled into consuming and conforming. In the break a woman came over and shared that she had just spoken to her teenage daughter and apologised to her for being so rigid about how she dressed; this mother had made a decision that it was better for her daughter’s well-being to experiment with who she was becoming via her clothes than needing to comply with who she wanted her daughter to be. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">When I was a teenager it was the tail end of Punk and the beginning of New Romantic, as an art student it was expected that I wear my ‘difference’; a motley collection of charity shops, hand-me-downs, hand-made and an occasional trip to the Kings Road. I didn’t have friends who bought their identity off the peg. We created unique looks from cheap-stuff and chopped and changed who we were on a weekly rotation. I remember wanting a pair of gold ankle boots I had seen on someone on Top of the Pops, I had a boring grey pair which I spray painted and wore that same night, with an old shirt of my Dads and a skirt I had made from vintage fabric found in my boyfriend’s loft. Of course, there were times when I bought clothes – I worked in a boutique so had too - but those items were mixed with the ragbag collection that I loved, and held onto for as long as I could!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">I still have much that same attitude to my clothes, so do my daughters. And when they were little girls a favourite summer holiday outing was charity shopping with a limited budget and the instruction to purchase as a gift for each other as well as something to wear personally. As a family we now have a ten pound limit on Christmas gifts for each other which forces everyone to be creative when trawling charity shops and turn present buying into an adventure.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Later in the afternoon yesterday I had coffee with a new acquaintance who had also connected with me over a chat about shoes. She told me how she had made a choice not to buy any new clothes since hearing my research; she now dresses mindfully and is really enjoying the renewed relationship she is having with her existing wardrobe. She questioned why she felt compelled to shop, what need was she attempting to meet and how unfulfilling that had become. It is so rewarding to know that on a micro-scale the impact of my research is trickling out into the real world. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">So if you are thinking about how you – or your children – can dress in a sustainable- flourishing-fashion where can you start? <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhgJi7FaYCJ9sLSh4o9kOeFE46Qczp88RnysY8u9mxK1uiAPQ8DMEkv7PwwUR7A8IdgfbgH2EiKiCXQYl0V-EnRPozNtIqTSuvO7D8IyZa1uKus3nzJFzBQrXL1XkJd5qBTWoFk_X3kZi4/s1600/brandon-morgan-16641.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1060" data-original-width="1600" height="211" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhgJi7FaYCJ9sLSh4o9kOeFE46Qczp88RnysY8u9mxK1uiAPQ8DMEkv7PwwUR7A8IdgfbgH2EiKiCXQYl0V-EnRPozNtIqTSuvO7D8IyZa1uKus3nzJFzBQrXL1XkJd5qBTWoFk_X3kZi4/s320/brandon-morgan-16641.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Photo by <a href="http://unsplash.com/photos/lTbvhkaTfGU?utm_source=unsplash&utm_medium=referral&utm_content=creditCopyText" style="background-color: #f2f2f2; box-sizing: border-box; color: #999999; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "San Francisco", "Helvetica Neue", Helvetica, Ubuntu, Roboto, Noto, "Segoe UI", Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: start; text-decoration-skip: ink; transition: color 0.2s ease-in-out, opacity 0.2s ease-in-out; white-space: nowrap;">Brandon Morgan</a><span style="background-color: #f2f2f2; color: #111111; font-family: , "blinkmacsystemfont" , "san francisco" , "helvetica neue" , "helvetica" , "ubuntu" , "roboto" , "noto" , "segoe ui" , "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 14px; white-space: nowrap;"> on </span><a href="https://unsplash.com/?utm_source=unsplash&utm_medium=referral&utm_content=creditCopyText" style="background-color: #f2f2f2; box-sizing: border-box; color: #999999; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "San Francisco", "Helvetica Neue", Helvetica, Ubuntu, Roboto, Noto, "Segoe UI", Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: start; text-decoration-skip: ink; transition: color 0.2s ease-in-out, opacity 0.2s ease-in-out; white-space: nowrap;">Unsplash</a></td></tr>
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<li><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: 7pt; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; text-indent: -18pt;"> </span><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; text-indent: -18pt;">Go shopping in your own wardrobe – play with what you already have without a preconceived idea as to what goes with what.</span></li>
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<li><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: 7pt; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; text-indent: -18pt;"> </span><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; text-indent: -18pt;">When you get dressed pay attention to how something makes you feel rather than how it makes you look.</span></li>
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<li><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: 7pt; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; text-indent: -18pt;"> </span><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; text-indent: -18pt;">Give yourself the freedom and permission to try on a different version of you – even if it’s only to be at home in.</span></li>
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<li><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: 7pt; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; text-indent: -18pt;"> </span><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; text-indent: -18pt;">Don’t save something that makes you feel amazing for special occasions.</span></li>
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<li><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: 7pt; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; text-indent: -18pt;"> </span><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; text-indent: -18pt;">Allow your children the same license to explore who they are and experiment with putting their look together.</span></li>
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<li><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: 7pt; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; text-indent: -18pt;"> </span><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; text-indent: -18pt;">Make shopping for clothes an opportunity to get creative, charity shops are a goldmine for clothes which can be played around with by adding bits and pieces to customise. You don’t have to be particularly crafty to change a shirt into a child’s dress or stick glitter on a second-hand bag. And children love the challenge of hunting for stuff to modify.</span></li>
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<li> <span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; text-indent: -18pt;">And of course all old wellies are so much better for us when they are gold, or indeed shiny pink and sparkly and you transformed them yourself. Perhaps you could have your very own festival in your garden or local park this weekend and get your friends and children to come in their customised flourishing fashion creations.</span></li>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; text-indent: -18pt;">I would love to hear your ideas for how you flourish with fashion and how you might encourage children to get creative with their clothes.</span><br />
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<br />10toshinehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12263916978396798526noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1842368037976453572.post-37782464071790354412017-02-17T10:11:00.000-08:002017-02-17T10:11:15.213-08:00What’s Love got to do with Wellbeing?<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">We thrive when we express positive emotions for others and
we flourish when we are on the receiving end of warm regard. The capacity to love and be loved is one of
the 24 VIA character strengths that could bring us gratification and authentic
happiness (Seligman, 2002). Love
as a positive emotion and our ability to form relationships are central to the
concept of flourishing when viewed from the perspective of PERMA. And that
means feeling love as a positive emotion in relation to our self as well as
others.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">So how can we make
sure we get all the benefits that lots of loving provides?<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I’m going to look at three ways that we can love and be
loved, loving ourselves from the position of self-compassion , being in a
loving relationship with significant others and love as a micro moment we can experience
daily with anyone, a universal experience that is a win-win situation.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">When I refer to self-love I am not talking about
self-esteem. When we are encouraged to view self-love as seeing ourselves as
better than others, as comparing who we are and what we have, we are setting
ourselves up to fail, to feel anything but self-love. But when we see it as
self-compassion we are accepting all of who we are, warts and all.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IvtZBUSplr4" target="_blank">Dr.Kristin Neff</a> researches self-compassion, she advises that
instead of heartlessly judging and criticizing ourselves we treat ourselves as
we would a good friend, with kindness and acceptance. Neff divides
self-compassion into three elements, self-kindness, common humanity and
mindfulness. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">With self-kindness we
are warm and thoughtful toward ourselves when we hurt, are unsuccessful, or
feel insufficient, rather wallowing in self-criticism; we recognize that being flawed
and inadequate, is unavoidable, so we are more likely to be gentle with ourselves
when challenged with life instead of feeling annoyed when we don’t get it
right. We can’t always be or get precisely
what we want and denying this certainty, fighting against the reality,
increases stress, frustration and self-criticism, accepting the inevitable with
consideration and thoughtfulness makes us feel better. We have greater
emotional stability, we can be in control. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">All humans suffer, displeasure at not getting our own way is
often compounded by an illogical but widespread sense of separation; no one
else has to put up with this! However by the very definition of being “human”
we are all vulnerable and imperfect. Therefore, self-compassion needs us to be
aware that distress is part of the shared experience of being alive; common
humanity highlights that this is something we all go through rather than
something that happens just because I am “me”. When we view life from this position we can
identify that our thoughts, feelings and actions are effected by “external” influences
such as our history, culture, genes and the environment, as well as the actions and beliefs
of others. Thich Nhat Hahn talks of a reciprocal cause and effect process in
which we are all imbedded; when we recognise this ‘interbeing’ we can be less
judgmental about our own imperfections. When we acknowledge our necessary
interdependence we don’t take ‘life’ so personally. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Mindfulness encourages us to take a sensible attitude to all
of our emotions in order that we neither repress nor inflate our feelings. We
cannot disregard our discomfort and feel empathy for the hurt simultaneously, mindfulness
necessitates that we don’t “over-identify” with thoughts and feelings, when we
create a space we are not driven to rash action, we are we are in
non-judgmental state of observation.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle">
<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Details
of all self-compasion exercises can be found at:<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpLast">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>http://self-compassion.org/category/</b><a href="http://self-compassion.org/category/exercises/#exercises"><b>exercises</b></a><b>/#exercises<o:p></o:p></b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b><br /></b></span></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhChJsDN3CGQ_Ke9nQ-a7k52xUsxXbu9318fv6mcu1ywHgkblvsQFDKYu9k-wZp7fiviP-fJRsGbzkcGbeF9dYsxv6GzNBrERYSTB48K4ZksacvF8p2f_dlx07sVp1_ejnnmJOwvCKbOgo/s1600/9rhgovrdrdm-freestocks-org.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="266" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhChJsDN3CGQ_Ke9nQ-a7k52xUsxXbu9318fv6mcu1ywHgkblvsQFDKYu9k-wZp7fiviP-fJRsGbzkcGbeF9dYsxv6GzNBrERYSTB48K4ZksacvF8p2f_dlx07sVp1_ejnnmJOwvCKbOgo/s400/9rhgovrdrdm-freestocks-org.jpg" width="400" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b><br /></b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b><br /></b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">When we are able to accept ourselves with kindness,
compassion and empathy we are more likely to be accepting of others and that is
a healthy position from which to form long-lasting relationships based on love.
And that that could come in handy as according to Harvard Psychiatrist<a href="http://greatergood.berkeley.edu/article/item/what_are_secrets_to_happy_life" target="_blank"> Dr.George Vaillant</a> we shouldn’t underestimate the power of love, because it's the
key to happiness, he proposes two pillars of happiness: "One is love. The
other is finding a way of coping with life that does not push love away... Happiness
is love. Full stop." He came to this conclusion based on evidence
from the Grant Study, one of the longest-running longitudinal studies of human
development. The project, which began in 1938, has followed 268 Harvard
undergraduate men for 79 years, measuring an astonishing range of
psychological, anthropological, and physical traits—from personality type to IQ
to drinking habits to family relationships to “hanging length of his
scrotum”—in an effort to determine what factors contribute most strongly to
human flourishing.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Vaillant has said that the study’s most important
finding is that the only thing that matters in life is relationships. A man
could have a successful career, money and good physical health, but without
supportive, loving relationships, he wouldn’t be happy (“Happiness is only the
cart; love is the horse”).<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">“The conclusion of the study, not in a medical but in a
psychological sense, is that connection is the whole shooting match,” says
Vaillant “The more areas in your life you can make connection, the better.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">So the study found
strong relationships to be far and away the strongest predictor of life
satisfaction and as life goes on, connections become even more important. <a href="https://www.ted.com/talks/robert_waldinger_what_makes_a_good_life_lessons_from_the_longest_study_on_happiness" target="_blank">The Grant Study</a> provides strong support for the growing body of research that has
linked social ties with longevity, lower stress levels and improved overall
well-being.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Knowing strong supportive meaningful relationships matter
are one thing keeping them going is quite another. Despite high rates of
divorce, infidelity and marital dissatisfaction, a 2012
study published in the journal <i>Social Psychological and
Personality Science </i>40 percent of couples who had been married for a decade
reported they were “very intensely in love”, As did couples who were married 30 years or
more with 40 percent of women and 35 percent of men saying they were “very
intensely in love”.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">In the <a href="https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2017/feb/11/the-100-year-old-couple-still-married-still-going-strong" target="_blank">Guardian</a> this weekend there was a report on a couple
who have been married 78 years. Morrie and Betty Markoff, 103 and 100, say that
there’s no particular secret to their very long marriage, other than tolerance,
respect and luck. But why has Morrie never told Betty that he loves her? Why
not the word “love”? Morrie states that
“to me, love is possessive; it’s controlling and demanding. The word that I
would rather use instead is ‘caring’. You care about people. ‘Care’, to me, has
a much deeper meaning. Love is an esoteric word, but one that people also use
to mean all sorts of off-hand things. ‘I love playing tennis,’ and such. I hug
Betty constantly, I kiss her constantly, I care very much about her.” <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I wonder how their relationship would have matched up to research
from <a href="https://www.gottman.com/blog/" target="_blank">the Gottman institute</a> which shows that to make a relationship last, we need to
be better friends, find a way to to manage conflict, and be creative to support each other’s dreams for
the future. theDr. John Gottman has nine
rules which he says support healthy relationships and are based upon
empirical data from studies of more than 3,000 couples. This research shows
what actually works to help couples achieve a long-term healthy relationship.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">This is what we need to do:<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraph" style="mso-list: l0 level1 lfo2; text-indent: -18.0pt;">
<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">·<span style="font-size: 7pt; font-stretch: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; line-height: normal;">
</span><!--[endif]--><b>Build
Love Maps:<o:p></o:p></b></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">How well do you know your partner’s inner emotional world, there
history, fears, anxieties, thrills, and expectations? Well get out some
coloured pens and a big sheet of paper and map them out. Together. For fun. And share.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraph" style="mso-list: l0 level1 lfo2; text-indent: -18.0pt;">
<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">·<span style="font-size: 7pt; font-stretch: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; line-height: normal;">
</span><!--[endif]--><b>Share
Fondness and Admiration:<o:p></o:p></b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> Contempt is the
death-knell of relationships, to strengthen fondness and admiration, express
appreciation and respect.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">·<span style="font-size: 7pt; font-stretch: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; line-height: normal;">
</span><!--[endif]--><b>Turn
Towards:<o:p></o:p></b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The small moments of everyday life are actually the building
blocks of relationship. Be aware of the moments when someone wants your
attention and respond to (turn towards)
them..<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">·<span style="font-size: 7pt; font-stretch: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; line-height: normal;">
</span><!--[endif]--><b>The
Positive Perspective:<o:p></o:p></b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> Look for solutions.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">·<span style="font-size: 7pt; font-stretch: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; line-height: normal;">
</span><!--[endif]--><b>Manage
Conflict</b>:<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> Manage conflict
rather than “resolve” conflict, because relationship conflict is natural and
has functional, positive aspects; there is a critical difference in handling continuous
problems and solvable problems.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">·<span style="font-size: 7pt; font-stretch: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; line-height: normal;">
</span><!--[endif]--><b>Make Life
Dreams Come True:<o:p></o:p></b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Create an atmosphere that encourages each person to talk
honestly about his or her hopes, values, convictions and aspirations.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">·<span style="font-size: 7pt; font-stretch: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; line-height: normal;">
</span><!--[endif]--><b>Create
Shared Meaning:<o:p></o:p></b></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Understand important visions, narratives, myths, and
metaphors about your relationship.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">·<span style="font-size: 7pt; font-stretch: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; line-height: normal;">
</span><!--[endif]--><b>Trust:<o:p></o:p></b></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">This is the state that occurs when a person knows that his
or her partner acts and thinks to maximize that person’s best interests and
benefits, not just the partner’s own interests and benefits. In other words,
this means, “my partner has my back and is there for me.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">·<span style="font-size: 7pt; font-stretch: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; line-height: normal;">
</span><!--[endif]--><b>Commitment:<o:p></o:p></b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">This means believing (and acting on the belief) that your
relationship with this person is completely your lifelong journey, for better
or for worse (meaning that if it gets worse you will both work to improve it).
It implies cherishing your partner’s positive qualities and nurturing gratitude
by comparing the partner favourably with real or imagined others, rather than
trashing the partner by magnifying negative qualities, and nurturing resentment
by comparing unfavourably with real or imagined others.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiBPCGsy-ge2jVt_m1QdB5voeBXuVbAEqxvDATPCwoSOLdUDAnYEJ6w7JD7Eqeg7zBJJ2QkNr1ZDvIT-Lr5vo_8o9m1WqzjQVv74tvQXLiNWjJgvZYeMgAtINLY29gmaeHyBHNQYS0WnM8/s1600/love-1306054.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="300" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiBPCGsy-ge2jVt_m1QdB5voeBXuVbAEqxvDATPCwoSOLdUDAnYEJ6w7JD7Eqeg7zBJJ2QkNr1ZDvIT-Lr5vo_8o9m1WqzjQVv74tvQXLiNWjJgvZYeMgAtINLY29gmaeHyBHNQYS0WnM8/s400/love-1306054.jpg" width="400" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">We seem to have greater expectations from our long-term
relationships than our parents generations had;
we want our relationships to help foster self-actualization and personal
fulfilment whereas as in the past
marriage was undertaken to provide for safety and security, and maybe sex on a
Saturday if played your cards right. (OK so I know this is a cliché but that’s
what my parents’ marriage was like). I wonder if this strain on an exclusive
relationship to provide the environment for flourishing is actually that good
for us? I prefer to give and get my love
from a wide range of sources, which is where <a href="http://positivityresonance.com/" target="_blank">Barbara Frederickson’s</a> take on love
works for me.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Fredrickson thinks that we need to take the view that first
and foremost, love is an emotion, a fleeting state that influences both our
mind and body. Love, like all positive emotions, feels good. However it is more than<i> feeling</i> good, a micro-moment of love, as with other positive
emotions, actually modifies our mind. It expands our awareness of environments,
our sense of self and the borders between us melt away, bathed with love we see
fewer differences between each other. In fact when we experience love as an
emotion we connect with a sense of oneness that can induce transcendence…love
is indeed a drug.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Fredrickson emphases the body’s perspective of love; when we
have positive resonance, micro-moments of shared love, our physiology responds
in very particular ways. She considers that love, as positivity resonance, is identical
whether the instants occur between parent and child, friends, lovers, or total
strangers. Fredrickson maintains that these micro-moments originate through the
eyes leading to us to be in sync with others. This idea of synchrony is
fundamental to understanding positivity resonance, Fredrickson uses three key
standpoints to explain her theory; oxytocin stimulation, vagal tone, and mirror
neurons, or what has been called “brain coupling.” <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">She cites research by Uri Hasson at Princeton and his
colleagues, who examined people engaged in conversation while their brain activity
was monitored by an fMRI. The research shows that when brains are in sync, the
neural links allows us to truly comprehend <i>another</i>.
This, (along with other studies) backs up positive resonance generating
reciprocal empathy, leading to a commonly shared physical occurrence in the
brain. So we sense our two brains as having one experience.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Fredrickson shows that people with higher vagal tone have
more moments of positivity resonance. Briefly the vagus nerve connects our brain to
our heart, it is involved in how we smile, make eye contact with others and
monitors the middle ear muscles so we can focus on other voices.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><i>Vagal tone</i> is the link of the heart rate to the
breathing rate so it stands to reason that the higher the vagal tone the
better. People with more and better positive connections, are more loving and have
high vagal tone. It used to be that vagal tone once was thought to be as stable
as one’s height and couldn’t be changed, however Fredrickson’s research was
able to prove that mind training can improve vagal tone. And it was done by
practicing loving-kindness meditation (LKM), the ancient Buddhist repetition of
nurturing positive feelings toward the self and others.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">In her Positive Emotions and Psychophysiology (PEP) lab she
randomly assigned participants to take part in <a href="https://www.sharonsalzberg.com/" target="_blank">LKM</a> for less than an hour a
week. Their vagal tone compared to a control group climbed radically after a
few months of daily practice. Those who had the largest increases in vagal tone
had the most frequent positivity resonance experiences with others.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">This is a radical research: Fredrickson establishes that
love isn’t something we just fall into: We can intentionally create love.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">She then adds oxytocin, “the great facilitator of life” due to its role in mother-infant bonding, social
connection, and sex, into the research mix. Oxytocin is released during intensified
engagement with others and is part of our “calm-and-connect” response. It makes
us more trusting and open to others. When we are under the influence of
oxytocin we pay more attention to
people’s eyes, smiles and other cues
that are associated with positive social connections, of course what this means is that positivity
resonance lasts only as long as people are engaged. (This is similar to <i>limbic
resonance</i> as described in <i> <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WNhbMIoD5PI" target="_blank">A General Theory of Love</a></i> by Thomas Lewis, Fari Amini, & Richard Lannon.)
<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Love, through this lens, is not just an emotion for soul-mates
and family members, it is not to be saved for special occasions. Love like this can be shared several times a
day with different people to cover the full gamut from the love of my life to
strangers on the street. Fredrickson’s definition of a moment of love is thus “Love
is a momentary upwelling of three tightly interwoven events: First, a sharing
of one or more positive emotions between you and another; second, a synchrony
between your and the other person’s biochemistry and behaviours; and third, a
reflected motive to invest in each other’s well-being that brings mutual care”
(<a href="http://www.unc.edu/peplab/publications/Fredrickson%20AESP%202013%20Chapter.pdf" target="_blank">Fredrickson 2013</a>, p. 17). This habit of building and maintaining strong
relationships, of cultivating micro-moments of positive resonance, can start
intentionally but builds to become who you are, so that loving and being loved
can indeed become a key strength in your value repertoire. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgfFyuFlUj1SaOey4vVXKztcRD41gehiJOlf7IUCTBGAi2V-iqqUhwQoTy1Z-aBs7LAchpwief7-x1Z9LbaZRBeynz7GCGETXUD-JQgdioW8wDRpEI5NUiOFvMZ3gydPUIylMQJ07Y_DCw/s1600/pnv0pesh9uk-viktor-forgacs.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="265" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgfFyuFlUj1SaOey4vVXKztcRD41gehiJOlf7IUCTBGAi2V-iqqUhwQoTy1Z-aBs7LAchpwief7-x1Z9LbaZRBeynz7GCGETXUD-JQgdioW8wDRpEI5NUiOFvMZ3gydPUIylMQJ07Y_DCw/s400/pnv0pesh9uk-viktor-forgacs.jpg" width="400" /></a></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">25 Barbara LOVE 2.0
facts <o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">1. "...love,
and its absence, fundamentally alters the biochemicals in which your body is
steeped."<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">2. Love is a
momentary state that can pass between strangers who share a mutually positive
experience together.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">3. Love is a
skill that can be learned which impacts the expression of your genes.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">4. "The sheer
complexity of love's biology is reason enough for awe."<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">5. When you
learn to prioritize love, you actually get more value from it and become
resilient faster.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">6. Love
literally changes your mind and enables you to see others wholeheartedly,
helping you transcend your usual ego perspective.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">7. Love is the
arising of three events: shared positive emotions, sychrony between you and
another's biochemistry and behaviours, motive to invest in each other's
well-being.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">8. Other
positivity emotions are not mirrored back in this way.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">9. Love
reverberates between people and belongs to all parties involved.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">10. Safety is a
precondition for love.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">11. People who
suffer from anxiety, depression, loneliness and low self-esteem; have a limited
ability to experience love 2.0.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">12. Eye contact
is a potent trigger for positivity resonance.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">13. You can
experience some of the positive effects of love 2.0 while alone, when thinking
about a loved one for instance, but the effects are diminished.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">14. Love impacts
your body on the cellular, even molecular level.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">15. Love
physically impacts your brain's development, causing you to experience more
positivity and less anxiety.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">16. Love 2.0
triggers cascades or oxytocin, sometimes called, "the love hormone".<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">17. Oxytocin is
the lead chemical in the "calm and connect" function; it literally
reduces stress.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">18. Oxytocin
appears to make people more intuitive about others.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">19. Love
increases "vagal tone", which your doctor can measure to predict the
likelihood of your having a heart attack.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">20. People with
higher vagal tone regulate glucose levels and inflammation, as common
denominator in many diseases, including diabetes, heart disease and cancer.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">21. Vagal tone
can be improved with training with positivity resonance. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">22. "In the
very moment that you experience positivity resonance, your brain syncs up with
the other person's brain."<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">23. The effects
of love can be carried to you by a person's voice.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">24. "Brain
coupling" occurs between people who are experiencing positivity resonance
and in some cases, you begin to anticipate the other person's thoughts,
feelings and words, rather than just react to them.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">25. The causal
arrow runs in both directions at once and drives self-sustaining trajectories
of growth.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjeMst8sudkA4C2R7fG8Q1SEffl59OqgS5RSmn4vDPhcK8HZ8q_VppYSccS8PSsW_ct0yLYTjc4D5yfS_K9GSqoIXpoZAzRjGIzgQJ_60zGK2RnrJbvwJ2rwZukT5lILPCYVeE73zPlCUQ/s1600/bq31l0jqaju-my-life-through-a-lens.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="225" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjeMst8sudkA4C2R7fG8Q1SEffl59OqgS5RSmn4vDPhcK8HZ8q_VppYSccS8PSsW_ct0yLYTjc4D5yfS_K9GSqoIXpoZAzRjGIzgQJ_60zGK2RnrJbvwJ2rwZukT5lILPCYVeE73zPlCUQ/s400/bq31l0jqaju-my-life-through-a-lens.jpg" width="400" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">So viewed from Fredrickson’s position love is far more universal
and abundant than the limited hearts and roses Valentines version. In this
manner <i>love is connection</i> that can be experienced as mild or intense but
either way our body responds with a set of positive reactions which increase
our wellbeing and may also increase our life expectancy. Whether it’s the moving
flutter of our heart when we gaze into a baby’s eyes or share a fond hug with a
loved friend, or the affection and sense of shared purpose we surprisingly
sense with strangers who’ve come together to listen to a lecture on positive psychology,
this kind of micro-moment of positive resonance can be experienced anytime two
or more people meet. And to me that feels just what we need right now. Following
love as a shared moment that unfolds and
resonates between and among people — <i>within</i> interpersonal
transactions — stops it being about me, my emotions, and
instead belongs to all parties involved, and to the symbolic connections that
binds us together, even if only briefly. So more than any other positive
emotion love belongs not to one person, but to multiples of people; within
connections we find meaning and purpose, hope and reason to believe that
ultimately everything will be OK. Romantic as that notion may seem I feel that
humans’ capacity for universal love will outlast any momentary damage that
individualism may inflict.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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10toshinehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12263916978396798526noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1842368037976453572.post-70995904869124536832017-02-04T04:31:00.001-08:002017-02-04T04:32:16.603-08:00Negotiating IPA :Reflections on becoming a Qualitative Researcher <div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<br /></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiYL9iouhmIGiTRCRdsQ0ollXhnhyphenhyphenmx1nFPYMl8MZJo_zfvJznDzG1dH2HIDOnAN2nerZrfJFiJW0kdrG0rf0k9l96gfC4ecWNzrAohaAtgm9xSJwvE3Q88iJ8jzgW9p_CPdtnsixGA7OE/s1600/xjski_seizy-oli-dale.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="426" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiYL9iouhmIGiTRCRdsQ0ollXhnhyphenhyphenmx1nFPYMl8MZJo_zfvJznDzG1dH2HIDOnAN2nerZrfJFiJW0kdrG0rf0k9l96gfC4ecWNzrAohaAtgm9xSJwvE3Q88iJ8jzgW9p_CPdtnsixGA7OE/s640/xjski_seizy-oli-dale.jpg" width="640" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Becoming a qualitative researcher has been a tough. I could
soften that sentence but the truth is I have found it a painful process, at
times I wanted to sit under the table and cry, there were moments when I wanted
to call the whole thing off, to divorce myself from the research never to go
anywhere near the idea of understanding <b>Anything
Ever Again</b>.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">I have left a healing gap between my study and reflecting on
what it meant for me. The space has moderated my emotional response, I can’t
wait to do it again, and the memory of an anguished sense of failing, of
falling into a hole of stupidity has passed. Like anything of value I have ever
created – I’m thinking of giving birth here, my daughters being the proudest
aspect of my life – the curve is step but coming out the other end is exhilarating.
<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">If you are considering qual research I hope these reflections
may be of some help to you:<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><u><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">BEFORE<o:p></o:p></span></u></b></div>
<ul style="margin-top: 0cm;" type="disc">
<li class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">My own enthusiasm for the
topic has driven the study. Prior to sampling I asked myself how it feels
when I wear an outfit that makes me happy. I hoped to be able to use my
personal understanding to shape the questions I needed for my
participants. I was able to approach the research with knowledge of my own
bias; I didn’t intend to bracket the assumptions, my feelings that being
part of the fashion system has been beneficial to me are part of my
personality.</span></li>
<li class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">I was concerned that my
need for understanding how others experienced wearing happiness could
result in producing results that were narcissistic. Was I being compelled
to poke into this subject to satisfy my own needs? What was I genuinely
interested in discovering? Was this any use to anyone else?<o:p></o:p></span></li>
<li class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">After reading everything I
could lay my hands on about IPA I had a crush on it as a method. Was I
being clear that it was the right qualitative approach to my question? Did
I just want to do IPA because I liked the idea of the depth of analysis it
offered? Was the research question the right one for this line of investigation?</span></li>
<li class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">How could I approach
participants to get the best ones for the study? How could I make sure
that my participants were going to produce the <i>right </i>responses? What if they didn’t understand what I was
trying to achieve? I was aware that
I felt too much pressure to make this study work; my need to get this
perfect was hindering me in getting on with it.<o:p></o:p></span></li>
<li class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">I was excited when people
responded to my Facebook request; someone wanted to take part, what a
relief. This whole process felt too personal, as if I were being rejected
not my ideas. My sense of identity was tied up with this study. The need
to see myself as a researcher became important as I presented my ideas to
ask for participants. <o:p></o:p></span></li>
<li class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">What did it mean to be a
researcher? Why was it so important that my participants had confidence in
me being a researcher? I knew that from my first contact with them I was
performing this role, including how I dressed!<o:p></o:p></span></li>
</ul>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"> </span></b><b style="text-align: center;"><u><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">DURING</span></u></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<ul style="margin-top: 0cm;" type="disc">
<li class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">First interview was
daunting. What could go wrong? Double checked that I knew my questions,
had extra batteries, had allowed enough time, had all paperwork printed
for signing. It was better than I had expected, felt very natural,
pleasant, enjoyable. For the first time I felt that this might work. I was
delighted with the answers. <o:p></o:p></span></li>
<li class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">When I listened back to
the recording there was some good data. It was interesting how asking
about one particular outfit led someone to talk about their feelings
around the way they dressed in a more general way. It wasn’t just about
that outfit. <o:p></o:p></span></li>
<li class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">I had decided to conduct
all the interviews before transcription, was this how you were supposed to
do IPA? The books gave very vague guidelines.<o:p></o:p></span></li>
<li class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Each interview got easier
by the third I was completely confident. I started all the interviews with
the same question but then let them develop naturally form that point. It
didn’t seem necessary to rigidly stick to the set questions. And actually
it felt as if the participants weren’t really listening to what I asked,
they were going to tell me what they wanted to say!<o:p></o:p></span></li>
<li class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Became very aware of
participants wanting to please me. Some explicitly telling me they choose
the outfit to make me happy as well as themselves??? This is more of a
responsibility than I imagined. My participants want me to like them,
understand them and it feels like a relationship.<o:p></o:p></span></li>
<li class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">I want them to like me
too. I feel as if we were sharing something significant that bonded us
together. A subculture based on being this particular group who were
involved in this study.<o:p></o:p></span></li>
<li class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">I had asked to take photos
but soon realised the obligation to show my participants in the best light
was going to be too much pressure. I hadn’t factored how I wanted to make
them look their best possible selves into the limitations of my
photography skills.</span></li>
</ul>
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<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><u>Transcriptions</u>:</span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: 57.75pt; mso-list: l4 level1 lfo3; text-indent: -18.0pt;">
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-stretch: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; line-height: normal;"> </span>TIME. Why does it take so long? Why did I think
this was a good idea? How can I get out of this now?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: 57.75pt; mso-list: l4 level1 lfo3; text-indent: -18.0pt;">
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-stretch: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; line-height: normal;"> </span>Each transcription made me feel as if the
participant had taken residency in my head.
I dreamt about them! <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: 57.75pt; mso-list: l4 level1 lfo3; text-indent: -18.0pt;">
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-stretch: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; line-height: normal;"> </span>I wish I had only had 3 interviews. This is too
much data.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><u><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Analysis:</span></u></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: 54.0pt; mso-list: l2 level1 lfo4; text-indent: -18.0pt;">
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-stretch: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; line-height: normal;"> </span>Where do I start? Just take one at a time and
plough through.<u><o:p></o:p></u></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: 54.0pt; mso-list: l2 level1 lfo4; text-indent: -18.0pt;">
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-stretch: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; line-height: normal;"> </span>I really don’t think it was a good idea to have
6 interviews. Each transcript is a case study and I would love to have the time
to devote the attention that they deserve. I feel as if I am skimming the
surface because of time restraints.<u><o:p></o:p></u></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: 54.0pt; mso-list: l2 level1 lfo4; text-indent: -18.0pt;">
<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">·<span style="font-stretch: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; line-height: normal;"> </span><!--[endif]-->It is daunting having all this information and
working it into usable data. I can’t manage it just with text on a screen. At
this point I printed off each set of transcripts on different coloured paper
and did old fashioned cutting, sticking and moving around. That felt like a
break through, suddenly combining themes was visible.</span><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; text-indent: -18pt;">I was able then to take the large posters I had
made and see the bigger picture. I kept changing my view point from overview to
details. This helped. As did reminding myself that this was about being true to
my participants not to my own needs of sounding clever and being a good
researcher.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"></span><br />
<div>
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span></span></div>
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">
<div>
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
After a supervision session I finally felt there
was some </span><br />
<div>
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">cohesion to the results. I
needed to realise that I couldn’t discuss it all. The choices that I was making
about what to focus on were not about being right or wrong. I had to go with my
intuition and feeling that I was doing my participants justice in the themes
that I saw emerging. We were in this together!<u><o:p></o:p></u></span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><u><br /></u></span></b></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><u><br /></u></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><u><br /></u></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><u><br /></u></span></b></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><u><br /></u></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><u>Writing up</u>:<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<ul style="margin-top: 0cm;" type="disc">
<li class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Actually turning the
results back from tables into a narrative required a different vision
again. I felt the funnelling of taking lots of information, turning into
themes then zooming back out and making it readable was very scary. It was
at this point that yet again I wanted to walk away.<u><o:p></o:p></u></span></li>
<li class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">I can only do this my way,
it’s not about producing a perfect
IPA, I haven’t done this before, good enough will have to be OK…
keep reminding yourself that there is an end. You will get there.<u><o:p></o:p></u></span></li>
<li class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Tables take much longer to
produce than they should.<u><o:p></o:p></u></span></li>
<li class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Stop being scared of the data
and just do it!<u><o:p></o:p></u></span></li>
<li class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Your participants have
given you a gift, it’s your job to make sure that it is wrapped
beautifully and displayed with pride. No Responsibility then!<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiYr02drkyWqM-VzQ0hOAXnzOvDYtCfHEEAdT6WPh3f9QiYkKjBUqxfDedBizWDKXT4iKvhM_7PhE31giufGczzDtAQ65P9y44gV202wVesdzEhi0uyI08DC_8q3pPldgIEjdVs-W_5bRk/s1600/20161218_175232.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiYr02drkyWqM-VzQ0hOAXnzOvDYtCfHEEAdT6WPh3f9QiYkKjBUqxfDedBizWDKXT4iKvhM_7PhE31giufGczzDtAQ65P9y44gV202wVesdzEhi0uyI08DC_8q3pPldgIEjdVs-W_5bRk/s320/20161218_175232.jpg" width="299" /></a></div>
</span></li>
</ul>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><u><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">AFTER<o:p></o:p></span></u></b></div>
<ul style="margin-top: 0cm;" type="disc">
<li class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">When can I do this again?<o:p></o:p></span></li>
<li class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">I love the interview stage
best.<o:p></o:p></span></li>
<li class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Transcription is painful
but not the worst part of the process.<o:p></o:p></span></li>
<li class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Analysing data and
grouping themes is horrible. It reminds me of being in therapy and not
wanting to accept the ideas that are floating around in your mind. You
know that all the denial in the world isn’t going to make them go away so
the sooner you accept the inevitable the better.<o:p></o:p></span></li>
<li class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">If I could do this for fun
and not have to be judged I would like it more. I loved the process (in
the end) but the fear of getting it wrong, not being good enough and
letting my participants down was crippling; at times I came very close to
giving up.<o:p></o:p></span></li>
<li class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">The fact that I believed
that fashion can be good for you kept me going. That and falling a little
bit in love with my participants. <o:p></o:p></span></li>
<li class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">I suspect that fear of
being judged has been the one factor in this process that has created the
most stress. If I had been able to let that go, the idea that once this
study was <i>out there</i> it would be
open to criticism, I would have been more relaxed about interpreting the
data.<o:p></o:p></span></li>
<li class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"> I found it daunting having to attach my
findings to theory; I would have liked the results to stand alone, outside
of a need to fit in with pre-existing concepts. That feels as if it just
about sums up the story of <i>me as a
researcher</i>. I don’t actually want to fit, or undertake research in the
way it is supposed to be conducted, but the need to be accepted by peers
pulls me to conformity. If fashion is about the paradox of negotiating
individuality and social approval then carrying out this study has
highlighted that tension for me in other areas of life.</span></li>
</ul>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">f you are embarking on quali research and would like support, advice or general chivvying along I will be happy to help. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Email me: <a href="mailto:Rebecca@10toshine.co.uk">Rebecca@10toshine.co.uk</a></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Connect on twitter :<a href="https://twitter.com/10toshine" target="_blank">@10toshine</a></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Facebook : rebecca weef smith/<a href="https://www.facebook.com/rebecca.wilkinson.5876" target="_blank">facebook</a></span></div>
</div>
10toshinehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12263916978396798526noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1842368037976453572.post-1139754592764596702017-01-31T10:37:00.001-08:002017-01-31T14:35:29.391-08:00Double Dry January (DDJ) is over; I'm left with tidy cupboards & Insta-love pangs!<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhspvoPNquxlkg5J7xn2Cl2ZhCB0p_NSc_YbIrXzqQwZqnK1NzwWWlBoeVGeN4kJBEhU7yx_VUdX8yK2z6X5CmGEPgCGa2Lnj89Nn9gCBVdlIhltanWii0udzGSGx0BCJNMOED2NEyzW1U/s1600/20170120_103813.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhspvoPNquxlkg5J7xn2Cl2ZhCB0p_NSc_YbIrXzqQwZqnK1NzwWWlBoeVGeN4kJBEhU7yx_VUdX8yK2z6X5CmGEPgCGa2Lnj89Nn9gCBVdlIhltanWii0udzGSGx0BCJNMOED2NEyzW1U/s320/20170120_103813.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">So DDJ is over and I’m reflecting on what in learnt…was
there any point in absenting myself from all forms of social media and denying myself
red wine for a month?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">At the start of January I was feeling ‘burnt out’. I’m not a
great fan of psychometrics but it just so happened that I needed to ascertain
my wellbeing for a university assignment, my score on PANAS (<a href="https://www.authentichappiness.sas.upenn.edu/testcenter" target="_blank">try it here)</a> was
on the low side for me, not clinically depressed but neither was it my normal
cheery bright-side reading. I was coming to the end of an intense year of
study, a Masters in Applied Positive Psychology, which had left me feeling uncertain
as to my intellectual abilities, I didn’t know what I wanted to do next and I wasn’t
sure why I had wanted a MAPP qualification in the first place. To compound my
misery I had been unable to dance since the end of November due to a silly
injury and the lack of exercise endorphins was kicking in; January found me
well and truly fed-up! <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">It seemed like an ideal time to retreat for a month and contemplate
in private, I turned off my notifications on <a href="https://www.facebook.com/10toSHINE/" target="_blank">Facebook</a>, <a href="https://twitter.com/10toshine?lang=en" target="_blank">Twitter</a> and <a href="https://www.instagram.com/10toshine/" target="_blank">Instagram</a>
and stocked up on fizzy water…and this is what I discovered…<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">When I am trying to let go of a habit I will find it easier
if I have a replacement arranged in advance. So instead of checking my phone in
the morning I made sure I had a book next to my bed, not just one that I happened
to be reading but a special one reserved for that time when I usually catch up
with social media. I allowed myself a chapter each morning with my tea and the
Today Programme.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Likewise having an alternative option to red wine in the evening
acted as a stand-in for that moment when the day turned to evening, I needed a
ritual that felt like a treat and most of the time fizzy water worked! I have drunk more camomile tea than I can remember ever consuming before and all that liquid does mean a lot more nighttime trips to the loo!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Whilst social media can be a habit that wastes time I am relatively
self-regulating in the way I use/used my online presence. I get a lot of
information via newsfeeds and certainly felt that a month without information gleaned
in this way hasn’t been beneficial. I enrich my knowledge with what I learn,
see and engage with through social media. Used as a platform to disseminate ideas
nothing else has the capacity to enhance the way I absorb the world. Stepping
back has made me realise that it’s a positive force for opening my mind to new possibilities.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"> I have missed friends
on social media. The connections I make online, those micro-moments that add to
my daily need to relate have become very important to me. Phone calls, face to
face meetings, long emails or even letters, are all lovely ways to be with
people but they are not always available. Staying connected to friends’ lives,
the everyday experiences they reveal online, the articles they share, shape my
relationships and without those networks I feel cut-off. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Given the current political climate I feel that I may have
benefitted from not ‘hearing’ the constant chatter of anxiety that must have
been going on, on the other hand I also feel that I haven’t been able to offer
support. Not that I feel that my occasional tweet would have any impact but I care
about what is going on in the world and appreciate social media for giving me
the chance to express my opinion; I don’t believe that we should overshare but
it is helpful for me to have an outlet for my thoughts. I enjoy using that line
of communication to say thank-you…to show my love for others work or to just
show I care. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Not drinking Wine has increased the speed at which I finish
the Guardian crossword. Just as checking FB was part of my morning routine so doing
the crossword in bed is an evening habit which has been enhanced by the additional
sharpness of sobriety. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">I was disappointed that not drinking alcohol had no impact on my weight, in fact I have a feeling that my jeans
are tighter at the end of January, that may not be the fault of no-wine however
but my enforced exercise limits. Yoga isn’t
quite the same in burning calories!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">The most difficult social media platform to not take a peek
of was Instagram. I missed Instagram with a deep longing. I use instagram to catalogue
the positive beauty I encounter daily. I miss having a space to create my view
of the world. Instagram acts as a visual diary to remind me of how amazing this
life, my life is, and how lucky I am. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">When I felt the urge to give in to either wine or Instagram I
took the time to question what was going on around me, what need was I trying
to meet? Being mindful was the most helpful strategy and what I learnt about myself
will continue to inform the manner in which I drink and interact online. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">I’m really looking forward to connecting and drinking. This has
been a month in which avoiding wine and Facebook has created a space that I have
filled with productive reflection, and tidying cupboards. It has made me
realise that it's ok to take pleasure in a bottle of wine with friends and that there
is nothing damaging to my mental health in spending time on Twitter. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">My positive emotion count is up, although whether this has
anything to do with abstinence is uncertain, I have more energy, I am ready to
get back out and be in the world. It hasn’t done me any harm to disconnect and
detox my liver but I can’t categorically say I feel it made any real difference
to my physiology or psychology and I don’t think I will repeat the experiment
any time soon. Hurrah for February.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
10toshinehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12263916978396798526noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1842368037976453572.post-24656576760185838082016-10-13T04:52:00.000-07:002016-10-13T04:52:12.590-07:00We have power as creatives? What will you do?<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif";"> <table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiNJyPP3k6T2lRaPDP7OFndz3VsjgOhFlFTez9d0yJMQEoiKsie_H3hflFMp993KCnk6SUrCm-IQ92uuMDQS9oDHOVQT-crg2djkTg5TAbU-tt89QbCz2b3cN2qQVRtPqgj9OuWV-8AioQ/s1600/LCFWorldMHDay2016a.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="228" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiNJyPP3k6T2lRaPDP7OFndz3VsjgOhFlFTez9d0yJMQEoiKsie_H3hflFMp993KCnk6SUrCm-IQ92uuMDQS9oDHOVQT-crg2djkTg5TAbU-tt89QbCz2b3cN2qQVRtPqgj9OuWV-8AioQ/s640/LCFWorldMHDay2016a.jpg" width="640" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Graphic by www.penmendonca.com @MendoncaPen</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif";">World Mental
Health Day on Monday 10<sup>th</sup> October was marked by the London and Home
Counties branch of the British Psychological Society with an event at the
London College of Fashion on Mental Health Issues in the Fashion and Creative
Industries. The evening was chaired by
Dr Carolyn Mair, - CPsychol, AFBPsS. Carolyn was wearing both of her ‘hats’ for
this event; one as Subject Director of Psychology at London College of Fashion
and the other as Chair of the British
Psychological Society’s London & Home Counties branch<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif";">The diverse
panel represented both fashion, Caryn
Franklin - MBE, MSc, Professor of Diversity in Fashion, Kingston University and
Rosie Nelson, model and health advocate, and mental health professionals, Dr
David O'Flynn - Consultant Psychiatrist at South London & the Maudsley NHS
Foundation Trust with a special interest in the Arts and Dr Annmarie Rankin -
Clinical Psychologist at Chelsea and Westminster hospital in the field of
paediatrics and a former ballerina with, among others, the Royal Ballet
Company.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif";"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif";">Carolyn began
the evening with an introduction to the issues that WMHD is aiming to address
in promoting discussion around mental health and what we can do to support
mental wellbeing. The extent of the problem specifically in the world of
fashion was highlighted by a report in Dazed magazine which cited that whilst
one in four people in the UK will experience a mental health problem each year that
increases by 25 percent if you’re working in creative job. The panel explored existing mental health
issues in the fashion and the arts. The emphasis was on the toll that the
demands of the fashion and creative industries can have on the wellbeing of
employees and consumers.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif";">The pressures
of working the fashion industry with long hours, high expectations to create
the next big thing, the stress of balancing the creative drive with the
business of making money and the demands of being ultra-thin, were all touched
on during the evening. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif";"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif";"><b>Four main
themes emerged:</b><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpFirst" style="mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -18.0pt;">
</div>
<ul>
<li><span style="font-size: 7pt; font-stretch: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; line-height: normal;"> </span><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; text-indent: -18pt;">Body
image and eating disorders, the impact on models and the general population and
similar issues in dancers. How can we change this?</span></li>
</ul>
<!--[if !supportLists]--><br />
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpLast" style="margin-left: 72.0pt; mso-add-space: auto;">
<i><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif";">“Stigma
is all of us. In speaking out I’m standing up for others.”</span></i><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif";"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: 72.0pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif";"> Rosie
Nelson<i><o:p></o:p></i></span></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpFirst" style="mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -18.0pt;">
</div>
<ul>
<li><span style="font-size: 7pt; font-stretch: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; line-height: normal;"> </span><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; text-indent: -18pt;">The
relationship between mental health and creativity, the negative view of
tortured genius. How art can help.</span></li>
</ul>
<!--[if !supportLists]--><br />
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="text-indent: 36.0pt;">
<i><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif";"> “Art
makes people better” </span></i><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif";">Dr
David O'Flynn<i><o:p></o:p></i></span></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -18.0pt;">
</div>
<ul>
<li><span style="font-size: 7pt; font-stretch: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; line-height: normal;"> </span><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; text-indent: -18pt;">What
we as consumers of fashion can do, diversity, sustainability, outsider fashion.</span></li>
</ul>
<!--[if !supportLists]--><br />
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="text-indent: 36.0pt;">
<i><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif";"> “Trends
are Choices” </span></i><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif";">Dr Annmarie Rankin<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -18.0pt;">
</div>
<ul>
<li><span style="font-size: 7pt; font-stretch: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; line-height: normal;"> </span><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; text-indent: -18pt;">The
potential for harnessing fashions power to enhance well-being both inside and
outside the industry.</span></li>
</ul>
<!--[if !supportLists]--><br />
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpLast" style="margin-left: 72.0pt; mso-add-space: auto;">
<i><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif";">“We
have enormous power to embolden and make a significant contribution.” </span></i><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif";">Caryn
Franklin<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif";">Rosie shared how
working in fashion as a model impacted her mental health, the constant pressure
to be thinner, to question what was wrong with her body and how widespread the
issue is. Many models are still children when they begin their careers, a time
when they are forming their identity. Rosie has chosen to speak out about this
issue but acknowledges how tough it is to do so. The panel attempted to come up
with ways in which the tiny sample size that all models are expected to fit
into could be changed. It would take the whole business of fashion to agree and
there is no cohesive organisation that would be able to take that decision. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif";">The fashion
world’s responsibility for eating disorders and body-shaming was spoken about
at length by the panellists. Annemarie commented that the fashion industry
doesn’t cause eating disorders; they are more complex than this. Body image is a fundamental part of our sense of self and our
identity, the fashion world needs to recognise the responsibility they have to
use this influence in a positive way and become part of the solution, rather
than being the problem. Rosie is pushing for new laws in the UK to promote a
healthier modelling industry. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif";">Annmarie drew
upon her experience as a young dancer to comment on the effects of body image
and self-esteem. Importantly she drew
attention to the fact that BMI, and low body weight are not always indicators
of poor mental health; it is possible to be a fit, emotionally healthy dancer and
be very slim. Annmaire also shared positive stories of dance being utilised to
assist well-being. There are many studies which support the role of dance to
increase well\-being from both the position of participating in dance practise and
as a spectator.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif";">David is Chair of the Adamson Collection Trust, Patron
of Raw Material Music & Media, Co-Founder/Director of Innovations in
Investigating Mental Health Population Outcomes (IIMHPO) and Trustee/Company
Director of the Bethlem Gallery. He shared his views on the way in which
creativity can be a contributing factor in recovering from mental ill-health,
echoing Grayson Perry’s statement that -<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif";"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: 36.0pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif";">“<i><span style="background: white;">Art should not be viewed just as a visual culture but
as an essential human process of self exploration and communication”</span></i><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: 36.0pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif";"><i><span style="background: white;"><br /></span></i></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif";">In order to
develop innovative strategies to deal with the issue of mental health in the
fashion and creative industries it would seem to make sense to harness our
natural assets, to get in touch with our creativity and reassess our own
measures of success. These are values that Caryn explained were fundamental to
her role as ‘Fashion Agitator’ to reform from within the business of fashion.
She advocates that consumers seize their power and shop according to the values
that they hold. Perhaps if we squeeze hard enough; apply pressure from the
bottom up with which trends we choose to buy into, and target those public
figures who have the ability to change from the top down, a balanced diverse
version of fashion will reflect the art of caring. The many high profile fashion insiders who
have experienced mental health issues could begin to challenge the stigma by
sharing their stories in a manner which
shows that it is possible to recover and maintain a prominent position in the industry
(of fashion). We hear of the tales of severe breakdown that has led to the sad
deaths of some fashions most creative talents, such as McQueen, but where are
the accounts of how it is possible to creatively traverse the inherent stress
of the business of fashion?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif";"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif;">On balance much
of the discussion was around the negative impact of being involved in fashion.
There was little dialogue as to how being involved in the arena of fashion can
be a force for positive well-being, or how as an industry it is attempting to
take care of the well-being of those inside. What can we do to create a culture
of positive mental health that could well lead the way to other industries? As
creativity is at the heart of what fashion’ is’ how can we apply those same
skills to providing innovative imaginative interventions to provide solutions
to the problems that working and studying in fashion appears to produce. And
how does fashion education prepare its students to enter this ‘unhealthy’
world? <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif";">Questions
from the audience followed the panel debate. The final question was how can we
de-stigmatize mental health?” This gave David the chance to highlight how the
way in which HIV treatment is now so effective that the physical impact from
the condition can be mitigated where-as the damage done to individuals suffering
from HIV, is because of the “fear of the other”; the impact on their mental
health. That is shocking fact. We need to create a society where by openness
takes away the power of the secrecy of mental illness, where we can talk about
our own struggles without being scared of the repercussions. And the fashion
and creative industries can influence this. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif";">This enlightening event highlighted
that diversity is alive and kicking in the creative industries, we just need to
tap into it in order to create well-being. The event was summed up visually
with a creative and colourful graphic representation by Pen Mendonca. I feel
that the strongest element in her depiction is <i>“ART AN HELP”.</i> It can and it does. Let’s celebrate that.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif";">Reflecting on
the event I recalled a comment made at a previous seminar at LCF, Tim Lomas,
positive psychology lecturer at University of East London, issued a statement
on the power of fashion to drive change:<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif";"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: 36.0pt;">
<i><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif";">“The most damaging thing
is to think that a situation can’t be changed or challenged, and we can
challenge and change situations through fashion.”<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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<i><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif";"><br /></span></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif";">I left LCF on
Monday evening with an even stronger desire to bring about change through the
vehicle of fashion.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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10toshinehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12263916978396798526noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1842368037976453572.post-45027415154145282132016-10-02T13:16:00.002-07:002016-10-02T13:16:26.034-07:00 Can You REMAP life with MAPP(CP) at UEL?<div class="MsoNormal">
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgms2jkI7-Ug2iemgTdpzUgzqyMW1xFXHhHfBT7pPSq6bP3c2-6y6KiOM0AmvP4G00zh7YVAv1XPJYRE0tXhoEBoQz_Oz2rS889ZI50-ewh_EVjqv2cepdfnHkJuEy2p9y_4oRUZ8sTfDA/s1600/LargeGraphicwithWebsiteCopyright-650x418.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="409" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgms2jkI7-Ug2iemgTdpzUgzqyMW1xFXHhHfBT7pPSq6bP3c2-6y6KiOM0AmvP4G00zh7YVAv1XPJYRE0tXhoEBoQz_Oz2rS889ZI50-ewh_EVjqv2cepdfnHkJuEy2p9y_4oRUZ8sTfDA/s640/LargeGraphicwithWebsiteCopyright-650x418.jpg" width="640" /></a></div>
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif"; mso-bidi-font-weight: bold;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif"; mso-bidi-font-weight: bold;"><br /></span>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif"; mso-bidi-font-weight: bold;">Here’s why I believe that studying MAPP(CP) will REMAP your life and produce copious amounts of wellbeing:</span><br />
<span style="font-family: arial, sans-serif;">(Martin Seligman - </span><a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iK6K_N2qe9Y" style="font-family: arial, sans-serif;" target="_blank">PERMA</a><span style="font-family: arial, sans-serif;">)</span></div>
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif"; mso-bidi-font-weight: bold;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif"; mso-bidi-font-weight: bold;">I am halfway through my MAPP(CP)
journey, I have been collecting together my reflections on the last six months and thought
I’d ask my fellow Mappsters for their thoughts on studying Applied Positive Psychology at <a href="https://www.uel.ac.uk/postgraduate/courses/msc-applied-positive-psychology-and-coaching-psychology" target="_blank">UEL. </a></span><span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif";"><o:p></o:p></span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEihqam__a_VbfsuY-o8iJcz63TCQAV1o50QrMNSmGV_eAjVcoAO-X4eu5BcH8VEEEesKy_Tmz6bauR5kxigVsmwZfdtYDYAn0NBGswA70zFz3wBC9AVOvYQBPiuCHlZynwPcjZZZHhsc20/s1600/20160507_181237.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEihqam__a_VbfsuY-o8iJcz63TCQAV1o50QrMNSmGV_eAjVcoAO-X4eu5BcH8VEEEesKy_Tmz6bauR5kxigVsmwZfdtYDYAn0NBGswA70zFz3wBC9AVOvYQBPiuCHlZynwPcjZZZHhsc20/s320/20160507_181237.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif";">Relationships:</span></b><span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif";"> <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif";"><a href="http://link.springer.com/article/10.1007/s10902-014-9592-6" target="_blank">Positive relationships</a> are at the heart of a life of wellbeing. Partners, friends,
family, colleagues, those people you regularly spend time with. The time and
energy you invest in cultivating significant relationships will manifest in a
life of greater wellbeing. Basically it’s other people who increase our
happiness.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif"; mso-bidi-font-weight: bold;">I have found the main benefit to my wellbeing from being part of this MAPP
tribe has been to do with relationships; I have never meet a more supportive
bunch of people whose curiosity, intelligence, kindness and drive enthuses me for
the future of PP. I cannot wait to see the results that my colleagues produce
with their research and how their ideas will develop into tangible ways to
further wellbeing. </span></div>
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<i><span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif";"> “You'll meet the best people ever.”</span></i><span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif";"> Angie<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif"; mso-bidi-font-weight: bold;">We are also in an enviable position to have great staff who produce exciting
research and are enthusiastic about the students’ areas of study; they create a
sense of belonging to a discipline that ‘practices what they preach.’</span><span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif";"> <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif"; mso-bidi-font-weight: bold;"><br /></span></div>
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<i><span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif";">“If you have any
concern, email Rona. She is the kindest and the most helpful teacher I have
met</span></i><span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif";">.” Lucie </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif";"> <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif";">However, as
Andrew pointed out, the structure of the course doesn’t allow for much time on
campus to interact. We all have our own ways around this, Andrew suggested we:<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<i><span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif";">“Talk to each other. Use
the Facebook group (or another one you create for yourself) to debate or share
ideas and articles. Also, consider using something other than Facebook (e.g.
Slack) because Facebook is really bad for you!”<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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<i><span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif";"><br /></span></i></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif";">I have found
setting up a <a href="http://www.pocket-lint.com/news/136472-what-is-slack-and-how-does-it-work" target="_blank">slack</a> group works for <i>my
group.</i> We have organised it so that we have threads for events, sharing
papers, posting where we are supposed to be when on campus and a gratitude thread.
We all know that expressing gratitude is favourable and sharing our thanks with
each other is also fun. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif";">We also have
a face-to-face meet up group. We initially set it up to co-coach each other but
soon realised that it is a great way to support our wider needs. This course is
intense, it changes you, at times its stressful; we all need to remind each
other that it will be OK. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif";"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: 36.0pt; text-indent: 3.0pt;">
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif";">“<i>I
would say trust the process. At times you will feel totally overwhelmed with
the assignments but that is all part of the process. And don’t forget to rest!!”
</i>Sanna Välttilä-Wit <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif";"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif";">And Lucie
offers support if you need help with SPSS (<a href="mailto:lresteau@gmail.com">lresteau@gmail.com</a>)
<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<i><span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif";">“Relax when you attend
the statistics lecture. It is not you if you feel you don't understand, even me
who had a solid background in stats, they lost me! Just ask your supervisor
what kind of test you need to choose and then focus your research on this only
test.”<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif";">As an on
campus student I appreciate the distance learners have their own set of challenges
- <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<i><span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif";">“If you are a distance
learner, try to connect with others - DL or on campus - it feels very
reassuring to be 'together' in spirit at least. I would also recommend trying
to get on campus for at least one weekend, ideally more. Face to face is
positive, clarifying and you get to meet real people!”</span></i><span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif";"> Paula<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif";"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif";">The course
has also impacted on my existing relationships, as a full-time student time management
is crucial, not everyone in your life will understand your need to put studying
before them. I have a large colour -coded wall chart in my kitchen with all my university
dates and commitments to independent study mapped out, my family can then
request slots with post-it notes where there are gaps and when friends come by
they can fill in the spaces with another colour post-it. This may seem a bit
OCD but it enables everyone to see that I’m not fobbing them off. And the end
goal is marked with a big get together to say thank you for all the support I have
received from family and friends.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , sans-serif;">Tip: relationships on <a href="https://www.researchgate.net/" target="_blank">researchgate</a> and <a href="http://academia.edu/">academia.edu</a> are also important.</span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhgQ2TVnJHpaVXX_1RHbGjON1X5c9sbCGECEZWtEEbd2MEIaLOrT5sPCcHUEdnw2Kb0fZ77aAdZvNPY2k6eT1zMbi-nT0r2XhdB9h2IMy_3wFNxhsG6n0iXB-3KS48ITTx91kvG678qckQ/s1600/hppylotus.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhgQ2TVnJHpaVXX_1RHbGjON1X5c9sbCGECEZWtEEbd2MEIaLOrT5sPCcHUEdnw2Kb0fZ77aAdZvNPY2k6eT1zMbi-nT0r2XhdB9h2IMy_3wFNxhsG6n0iXB-3KS48ITTx91kvG678qckQ/s320/hppylotus.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif";">Engagement:</span></b><span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif";"> <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif";">When your
attention is fully focused on a task, hobby, work or person, when you are
totally in the present moment, you go into a state of mind called <a href="http://stat.psych.uiuc.edu/~ediener/Documents/Diener-Suh-Lucas-Smith_1999.pdf" target="_blank">flow</a>. In this
state you lose track of time and forget about almost everything else, including
your own sense of self. <a href="http://link.springer.com/article/10.1007/s10902-006-9018-1" target="_blank">Mindful awareness</a> encourages you to cultivate your
ability to focus and you get into this engaged state more often.</span><span style="font-family: "arial" , sans-serif;">The more
often you are in flow, fully engaged the more likely you are to experience
wellbeing.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif";"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif";">I haven’t fully
engaged with every topic in every module but when something has ‘clicked’ with
me I have wanted to know everything there is to know about it. At times I have
tipped from engaged to over the top <a href="https://www.uclouvain.be/cps/ucl/doc/ir-ipsy/documents/Balon.pdf" target="_blank">obsession</a>. For me this is most apparent in
my dissertation research. I love my research topic. I am living my research
topic. I became so attached to it that I had a period of about ten days when I
think I may have been suffering from ‘research mania’. It wasn’t pleasant. I had
to be pulled back to reality by a close friend who pointed out that there were
other things to talk about!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif";">This is a tricky
one: research is MEsearch, we all need to be passionate about our topic to
sustain the process; it is a long journey. And one in which we need to get lost
before we can find the path we need to be on. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif";">So be engaged
but listen out for signs of obsessive passion. Losing sense of time is good but
remember to re-engage with others to maintain balance.<o:p></o:p></span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiiKS21an0wVd4ZDQCDqVqO7eqiIk5sUfq7hR0-5p9zl37NUCJ6LHqvYamWHCqU-ZYbNa-OahrD7pYz3VqdefBiU0RFkKNrWBMsKZX9EmP5Nz5YkTqhnnXlZNi5Dhby8Sp0InQMV3UjvpI/s1600/stars.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiiKS21an0wVd4ZDQCDqVqO7eqiIk5sUfq7hR0-5p9zl37NUCJ6LHqvYamWHCqU-ZYbNa-OahrD7pYz3VqdefBiU0RFkKNrWBMsKZX9EmP5Nz5YkTqhnnXlZNi5Dhby8Sp0InQMV3UjvpI/s1600/stars.jpg" /></a></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif";">Meaning: </span></b><span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif";"> <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif";">I was drawn
to PP to find a way to apply <a href="http://www.annualreviews.org/doi/abs/10.1146/annurev.psych.52.1.141?journalCode=psych" target="_blank">wellbeing theory</a> to myself but also because I really
trust that it is a cause that’s bigger than me; that the science of happiness
is working to improve humanity’s lot in some way, whether on a grand scale or
small steps we can make a difference.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif";">I think that
working out your own niche within PP can be a useful manner in which to look at
your own feelings about a meaningful life. I have had to confront my personal biases,
certain topics have certainly aroused strong antagonistic emotions…hmm that’s interesting,
what’s that about?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif";"><a href="http://www.drpaulwong.com/what-is-second-wave-positive-psychology-and-why-is-it-necessary/" target="_blank">Second Wave</a>
PP has forced me to observe my responses to negative emotions; really acknowledging
my reactions when I have engaged mindfully with this course does not always feel
good. There have been tears, anger, and frustration. I have learnt first-hand
that there are times when expressing ‘negative’ feelings can have positive
outcomes. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif";">(On this note
many MAPP(CP) students expressed frustration at UEL administration- but we can
all step back and understand that our feedback leads to change. My experience
is that the staff are always available to listen to issues and respond to them
as best they can.)<o:p></o:p></span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi80XCHHD_0ljzerY3AgTgO8rxo1ylxod8vKVY9Kc-xylDs8wxkmRMUg1q2_m1IuWUWQaut_RrtqWIYEtTsaR60RGoODkfCY86zkDbQDnMUVYDyqDmcYbqry2HMJdMqKgUL9-ldbPMQgbQ/s1600/down-breathing+inspiration.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi80XCHHD_0ljzerY3AgTgO8rxo1ylxod8vKVY9Kc-xylDs8wxkmRMUg1q2_m1IuWUWQaut_RrtqWIYEtTsaR60RGoODkfCY86zkDbQDnMUVYDyqDmcYbqry2HMJdMqKgUL9-ldbPMQgbQ/s320/down-breathing+inspiration.jpg" width="226" /></a></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif";">Accomplishment:</span></b><span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif";"> <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif";">Achieving a
goal makes you feel great. Being mindful along the way to that end result makes
it enjoyable and emphasizes the importance of the journey to the achievement. Clarifying which goals are important to me,
focusing on those that are achievable, breaking the goal into tangible steps have
saved me from feeling overwhelmed with the responsibility of doing a MSc.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif";"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif";">Andrew has
some tips on achieving this:<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: 36.0pt;">
<i><span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif";">“Download <a href="https://www.mendeley.com/" target="_blank">Mendeley</a> if
you're not already using a reference manager. Read the first 'core' text that's
recommended for each module, but then pick and choose what else you read. Read
as much as you can, but don't get bogged down in trying to read everything”<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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<i><span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif";"><br /></span></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif";">Getting to
the end of this course will be a massive achievement that I’m planning on celebrating
with a party (see relationships). I also
give myself a pat on the back with each assignment turned in. We encourage each
other on our slack group or Facebook when we have ticked off each step towards
this accomplishment. We also remind ourselves of the value of what we are
doing, not everyone can achieve this goal, and we need to take time to give ourselves
credit for embarking on this challenge.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif";"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , sans-serif;">Tip: I have found google scholar just as helpful as more complex search options. </span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhBGlzF7EF4rJJCSgOdrmWFkWWqaeo6fUf4Rld7VZalCPlrIcqlwInlxxET5Ox3gKnTJku0kfi_zcNAtr6TaskWD_4Vd66OIf6ZhMTV9JXnRjRT464FvsBREO4xad3y8nB-xz74doerDjg/s1600/IMG_20160703_202116.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhBGlzF7EF4rJJCSgOdrmWFkWWqaeo6fUf4Rld7VZalCPlrIcqlwInlxxET5Ox3gKnTJku0kfi_zcNAtr6TaskWD_4Vd66OIf6ZhMTV9JXnRjRT464FvsBREO4xad3y8nB-xz74doerDjg/s320/IMG_20160703_202116.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif";">Positive
emotion:</span></b><span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif";"> <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif";">Joy, hope,
curiosity and love, these <span id="goog_2007164686"></span><a href="http://sal.aalto.fi/files/aaltosystemsforum/positivity/BLF21062010.pdf" target="_blank">emotions</a><span id="goog_2007164687"></span> are important to enjoy in the present moment
and are an essential element of wellbeing. You can’t <i>feel </i>happy all the time or pursue pleasure at the expense of
meaning, and you won’t when studying MAPP(CP), but there will be ample opportunity
for experiencing positive emotions on this course. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif";">Applying positive
psychology interventions to yourself, being joyfully playful with your
research, feeling constantly curious about what is going on, and loving everything
… and everyone that you encounter…sometimes in a blissed out OMG way. (That’s not
just me is it?) You may also get a sense of extreme positive emotions when you
get your marks back, when you go to the pub and when you finally find the paper
that advises the very research study you have designed. Oh yes and mastering how
to cite correctly, how to input data into <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ADDR3_Ng5CA" target="_blank">SPSS</a> and why <a href="http://www.ipa.bbk.ac.uk/about-ipa" target="_blank">IPA</a> isn’t Real Ale are
also moments of joy. Curiosity is aroused every time you search for a room
change, it’s not obvious to me, and hope whenever you turn-it in, fingers
crossed. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif";">But mostly it’s
love; and often its self-love, that you have got this far, made this choice and
having a great time building relationships that will be part of your life for a
long way ahead.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif";">By applying research-based
approaches to wellbeing we acquire the necessary skills to flourish and live a
life of promise, purpose and fulfilment. As MAPP(CP) students we learn how to flourish by
combining mindfulness, character strengths and other PPIs by engaging in our work,
acknowledging a higher sense of meaning
and purpose, understanding physical and psychological wellbeing, and improving
our relationships. I am very grateful to
have had this chance. Thank you UEL.<o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif";"><br /></span>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEierkd2Bksr6ezzBSNWpqooYxgOmfyxRNR8_JqOyDO8Miv9cUQCMoejzsUA0qeBO3iFeXyTegpK3jioEUiuj7Y025HTrCtGfLUku15AW-dxGgjOf0BbBmKhgJ5EXlpaOZPm5Lk5XX4_gd4/s1600/thanks-beach.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEierkd2Bksr6ezzBSNWpqooYxgOmfyxRNR8_JqOyDO8Miv9cUQCMoejzsUA0qeBO3iFeXyTegpK3jioEUiuj7Y025HTrCtGfLUku15AW-dxGgjOf0BbBmKhgJ5EXlpaOZPm5Lk5XX4_gd4/s320/thanks-beach.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif";">However last
word to Andrew:<o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif";"><br /></span></div>
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<i><span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif";">“Remember that a lot of
what you'll be taught will probably be debunked within 10 years! This is new
science, and quite sexy, and a lot of researchers are a bit too quick to get
their TED talk about their latest discovery. There's a serious replication
issue with a lot of this, so don't take anything you're taught as being
'settled science' - it isn't!”<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif";">Actually I will
have the last word: You don’t need to be a scientist, settled or otherwise, to
have something worthwhile to contribute to PP. I think the future of PP lies in
its openness and inclusivity, the way in which as a discipline it is looking to
share and collaborate in order to create tangible applications that cross boundaries.
This is great for me as I’m just looking to make people happy when they get
dressed every day!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
10toshinehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12263916978396798526noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1842368037976453572.post-30530488957812665842016-09-26T09:43:00.004-07:002016-09-26T09:43:40.861-07:00Increasing Mental Wealth at City Lit<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgn6Wi7sxF6eHn-a4yd7N9HoroMo_sON0DphdjgwDLxcRvT0__Juh6cNUskdc4NcZeNZ1rI8QcyW79yv7gH3xd8ffRExLmjdGlp23Fpsx9uxxQImA8HE55JbOsgPEASZX8_kVMA_R33arA/s1600/mental+wealth.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="378" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgn6Wi7sxF6eHn-a4yd7N9HoroMo_sON0DphdjgwDLxcRvT0__Juh6cNUskdc4NcZeNZ1rI8QcyW79yv7gH3xd8ffRExLmjdGlp23Fpsx9uxxQImA8HE55JbOsgPEASZX8_kVMA_R33arA/s400/mental+wealth.jpg" width="400" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The Mental
Wealth Festival 2016 took place on 13-15 September 2016 at City Lit in Covent
Garden. The event highlighted the way mental health issues impact</span><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> </span><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">many features of daily life, and how the
arts, politics, culture, faith and the media can support ‘mental wealth’.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I went along
to the City Lit with a full list of workshops and presentations to
attend. The choice was a diverse range of speakers and subjects covering topics
from an academic perspective through to practical skills.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The festival featured
70 events with high profile speakers such as Ruby Wax, Alastair Campbell, Hugh
Grant, Paul Dolan and Cardinal Cormac Murphy-O’Connor rubbing shoulders with
lesser known but equally exciting presenters.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">As is often the case at these
events I feel that attending one session leaves me with the feeling of having
missed out; this festival had it all. And I wanted to do it all! I missed the
chance to witness three members of the House of Lords take part in lunchtime tai-chi,
I didn’t get to any sessions on the links between money and mental health or
get a chance to take part in any of the creative workshops. Therefore this post is skewed as I can only share
personal thoughts of the event. The
festival produced a host of ideas for topics, lists of questions, people I
want to interview and a general feeling of needing to do more. The question that I have been left with relates
to the importance of how we can all raise awareness and reduce stigma around
our mental health?</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhgV0YyLjD_mY4tkAMd526g-gF4y9qJD_i1vkb5SvE9odRmVEN9FKJa_CawnmEE4q7zyxkzgfQGxjrUm0xRgCjk5W_YL-TBJwP9V2WnDaXk6loCFQuHGg24SziOvdaLU_dco2PnrHq0Pfw/s1600/unnamed+%25283%2529.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhgV0YyLjD_mY4tkAMd526g-gF4y9qJD_i1vkb5SvE9odRmVEN9FKJa_CawnmEE4q7zyxkzgfQGxjrUm0xRgCjk5W_YL-TBJwP9V2WnDaXk6loCFQuHGg24SziOvdaLU_dco2PnrHq0Pfw/s320/unnamed+%25283%2529.jpg" width="320" /></a></span></div>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> <o:p></o:p></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I shall be
expanding my reflections in future posts, but in a nut shell this is what I </span><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">discovered:</span></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><u>Session: Changing Minds through Neuroscience Inspired Fashion - Sandy
Walker </u></span></b></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgbCw99lINGA_stGDLBHUt0HoTkTfVa4U6QBiXFtCAArscMzbqLZ3wyJ10lnWKJQoqIdK7zYDoJ96cQBke08kAchfRySc5B5wyvUUUxXBRsUqFMa9OjLwIwDOQWIvx85hlI7TA5PWgml0A/s1600/download+%25284%2529.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgbCw99lINGA_stGDLBHUt0HoTkTfVa4U6QBiXFtCAArscMzbqLZ3wyJ10lnWKJQoqIdK7zYDoJ96cQBke08kAchfRySc5B5wyvUUUxXBRsUqFMa9OjLwIwDOQWIvx85hlI7TA5PWgml0A/s320/download+%25284%2529.jpg" width="207" /></a></span></b></div>
<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> <o:p></o:p></span></b><br />
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<b style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Content:</b><span style="color: #424242; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Sandy Walker, from the
Faculty of Health and Sciences at the University of Southampton, shared the
work that students from Winchester School of Art have produced by collaborating
with the Southampton Neuroscience Group. This project aims to address the
stigma and misconceptions surrounding mental health through fashion design. The
students have an opportunity to visit the neuroscience department and learn
about the brain patterns created in patients with mental health issues such as
bi-polar disease, dementia, and Parkinson’s, they then decide which issue they
wish to learn more about and are connected to someone with the condition via
the Human Library. The final part of the project involves responding to all the
have discovered by producing a garment
that reflects the physiological and psychological, the science and the
human, in clothes that communicate what it is like to have that condition. The
finished garments are a diverse collection. Some students took the images of
the brain to create intricate textile designs, others responded with powerful
garments that restricted the wearer. The collection was shown as a fashion show
and was on show at the city lit during the festival.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Find out more here:<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><a href="http://www.southampton.ac.uk/biosci/research/changing_minds.page" target="_blank">http://www.southampton.ac.uk/biosci/research/changing_minds.page</a></span></b></div>
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<b><a href="http://humanlibraryuk.org/" target="_blank">http://humanlibraryuk.org/</a></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>Takeaways: </b>Could the model of this collaboration
be used by other fashion education or Art departments to increase awareness of
mental health issues?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">How did it
feel to wear the garments? <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Can I
interview the models to find out their phenomenological embodied experience of
wearing ‘schizophrenia’ or ‘dementia’? <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">How did the
human library participants feel about the finished collection?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">What was the
lasting impact (if any) on the student who took part?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The resulting
garments were strong and emotional; I felt moved by the stories reworked in
fabric. I had a visceral response, particular as I imagined myself wearing each
outfit and how that would make me feel; trapped, misunderstood, angry, and
vulnerable. The tactile nature of clothes, the way they connect with our bodies
and our emotions, enclothed cognition, can shape different ways to approach
opening up a dialogue about mental health. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Could this
idea be extended to a younger group, school age, to create understanding?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><u>Session: An
Artist’s Tale: Michael Nicholson in conversation with Dr Roger Banks</u><o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
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<b style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Content:</b><span style="color: #424242; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> </span></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjw5kPRpM9qiOZtM23mCZjhqX-U9J5ae-30gJB2uoX7N9TaIHpOdDH0ddIX8ToqjtZcp7YjEHqy-9iF4sXI5giIlZlZ9XwHHog0ZT0SSNDioanJGpbrSSVOLkzZDmZokPQ0ugWwxfhTwN0/s1600/images.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjw5kPRpM9qiOZtM23mCZjhqX-U9J5ae-30gJB2uoX7N9TaIHpOdDH0ddIX8ToqjtZcp7YjEHqy-9iF4sXI5giIlZlZ9XwHHog0ZT0SSNDioanJGpbrSSVOLkzZDmZokPQ0ugWwxfhTwN0/s200/images.jpg" width="200" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="background: white;">Roger introduced </span>Mike’s work as a graphic artist, his
Ensixteen Editions projects and how he came to be an illustrator for Books
Beyond Words. The relationship between authors (Roger) and illustrators (Mike),
the way in which we translate images into meaning, how we read a blank screen
to create a narrative and what does a picture ‘say’, were all explored in words
and pictures.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The evolution
of an idea into a tangible book charted the collaboration, team work and testing
process involved in the process of creating a book beyond words.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Books Beyond
Words was formed 1989 by Baroness Sheila Hollins to help people with
developmental learning disabilities to understand their emotions, to help
people talk about or understand adult feelings and adult experiences. Forty
five titles have been published since 1989, and all have been co-produced with
people who find pictures easier than words, with family carers, support staff
and professionals.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>Find out more here:</b><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b><a href="http://booksbeyondwords.co.uk/" target="_blank">http://booksbeyondwords.co.uk/</a></b></span></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Takeaways:</span></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Books Beyond
Words provide a valuable resource for expanding understanding to a population
who may not be able to access traditional routes to acquire knowledge. Pictures
offer emotions a chance to escape. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">How can I use
images in my work to bring about change in my clients or to facilitate
discussions about emotional issues?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">What stories
do I tell myself when I see a piece of Art? How do I read an illustration? What
about the artists’ intention?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Continuity of
character by using the same colours throughout make it easier to form a
relationship.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><u>Session: Fiona Wilson – Emotions, Identity and the Self Fulfilling
Prophecy</u><o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhAlQNN-egsHB_AVTaTC7-RiZWHByTXzH6-TlpVMH5vBS_g0DJcHChOIPLVFSVuvW1_uoONMa8jIlWsheoCFZuDelLcX24VmA6FIypPoj91_HBaIz54d-QtueceqoP2TqXeX9RkN-vHnJ0/s1600/download+%25283%2529.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhAlQNN-egsHB_AVTaTC7-RiZWHByTXzH6-TlpVMH5vBS_g0DJcHChOIPLVFSVuvW1_uoONMa8jIlWsheoCFZuDelLcX24VmA6FIypPoj91_HBaIz54d-QtueceqoP2TqXeX9RkN-vHnJ0/s1600/download+%25283%2529.jpg" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>Content:</b><span style="background: white; color: #424242;"> </span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Fiona Wilson, a teacher and lecturer at
St Mary's University, Twickenham, led this workshop to explore how our
perceptions of self are formed by our emotions and how these in turn inform our
patterns of behaviour. Fiona explained how she had moved from Emotional
Literacy to Emotional Wisdom, the value of listening, watching and learning
form children, how we stack our experiences to skew our understanding of ‘now’
and how ninety seconds is all we have of an experience, then rest being
imagination. (The content of this workshop needs 3000 words of its own to do it
justice, I will come back to this later)<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>Find out more here:</b><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<b style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fSOznooiPoI" target="_blank">https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fSOznooiPoI</a></b></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Takeaways:<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">We can’t
out-think a feeling; we have to out-feel a feeling. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">We see what
we look for and hear what we listen for.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">When our
imagination habitually sabotages our minds our brains create pathways that
biologically become traits.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Imagination
is what keeps an experience going.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">How can we
harness reframing to become self-authors of the story we want to create?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">We need to
meet ourselves with forgiveness, kindness and compassion <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><u>Session: Alastair Campbell, mental
health campaigner and an ambassador for Rethink and Mind in conversation with Mark
Malcomson, Principal of City Lit</u><o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></b></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjPSOj5zCUo9aHnYNouBu5frL3IScdwafClROHKID2rk0Z1T9haKl-1wTq1n6Tx_MGyKfbsRbQlxpANo9-nHqJ8SNCN-HT82t0tBzgmo38ky9vS3Mn8-V3AAXunPRXsHPCcUi9jtfLsuuY/s1600/download+%25281%2529.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjPSOj5zCUo9aHnYNouBu5frL3IScdwafClROHKID2rk0Z1T9haKl-1wTq1n6Tx_MGyKfbsRbQlxpANo9-nHqJ8SNCN-HT82t0tBzgmo38ky9vS3Mn8-V3AAXunPRXsHPCcUi9jtfLsuuY/s320/download+%25281%2529.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>Content:</b> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Drawing on his own experiences, Alastair
Campbell discussed his own mental health issues, and how he works to help break
down the stigma around mental illness<b>. </b>He
was exceptionally open about his breakdown, the impact this had on his family
and career and the support he received from colleagues. Tony Blair's response
when Alastair introduced his mental health issues, “I’m not bothered, if you’re
not bothered “, was a lesson in trust and instincts when making decisions. Alastair
explained that he feels experienced mental health problems better qualifies him to take on challenging roles; he has overcome ‘stuff’ in his life, he is
more resilient and understanding. How would it be if we could all be this open
about our emotional battles? What would a world look and feel like if this were
the norm?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Find out more here:<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><a href="http://www.time-to-change.org.uk/news-media/celebrity-supporters/alastair-campbell" target="_blank">http://www.time-to-change.org.uk/news-media/celebrity-supporters/alastair-campbell</a></span></b></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">My takeaways:<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Football is
vital to the mental health of some people. Music too.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Why do we say
it’s brave to talk about mental health?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Honesty and
openness are the tools for eliminating stigma about mental health issues.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Resilience
can be learnt; it’s about managing your life.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Why don’t we
send get well cards and flowers when people have had a breakdown?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">There is a
difference between ‘being humbled’ and ‘being humiliated’. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><u>Session: Professor Paul Dolan, LSE
professor and author of bestselling book Happiness by Design in conversation
with Mark Malcomson, Principal of City Lit</u><o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></b></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgBwm8NtZG_Kf-BowPFqlDGZ2_9ZxWDEKwpMzAirnNjPBzqDURqKisSgZBwajkgVGn7JmRXcnooRuWteOuxzqgCU0Wx_T-EnjTS_BpUxex7APqtwMGPMteZbZWhoVOyC4Ye7p889XfW2u8/s1600/unnamed+%25282%2529.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgBwm8NtZG_Kf-BowPFqlDGZ2_9ZxWDEKwpMzAirnNjPBzqDURqKisSgZBwajkgVGn7JmRXcnooRuWteOuxzqgCU0Wx_T-EnjTS_BpUxex7APqtwMGPMteZbZWhoVOyC4Ye7p889XfW2u8/s320/unnamed+%25282%2529.jpg" width="213" /></a></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Content:</b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Paul began by clarifying the confusion around
what we mean by happiness. How in order to create the feeling of life being
good we need to balance the simple pleasure feelings, the positive emotions,
and the purposeful, meaningful sense of fulfilment. He expanded the idea that ‘negative’
emotions can feel ‘good’ that anger can be a driver for change and that it is our
everyday life that makes us happy not necessarily the big things that we think
should make us happy.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></b></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></b></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></b></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Find out more here:<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<a href="http://www.lse.ac.uk/researchAndExpertise/Experts/profile.aspx?KeyValue=p.h.dolan@lse.ac.uk" target="_blank">http://www.lse.ac.uk/researchAndExpertise/Experts/profile.aspx?KeyValue=p.h.dolan@lse.ac.uk</a></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></b></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Takeaways:</span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">We all have a
choice to make life purposeful; it can be whatever works for you.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The human
condition is to seek out meaning.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Reminder:
research is MEsearch.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Academics may
not be so hot on pleasure but expert on purpose. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Find your own
happiness maximiser experiences, they are entirely subjective.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">It is healthy
to have appropriate responses to situations.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">We need light
touch interventions around sorrow<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The narrative
of trauma doesn’t leave room for those
who experience trauma not to experience their life to be devastated.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></b></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><u>Session: Reframing the Debate - A Discussion on Press Intrusion</u></span></b></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><u> – Katie Traxton</u><o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></b></div>
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<b style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; text-align: center;"></b></div>
<div style="display: inline !important; text-align: left;">
<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Content:</span></b> </div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg7tFcCz6Lyc2IDcy0JmmNQNCwHF9ZsjE9xyH1Rw9sb_1KhbnT6JN7YQxLs6Y70Y7yQljf8Thuka5jd9RYH8bsdA5KLLk085MHZ87pqoYgA5kqTCUpGhyFR296sjctEHv9j439HpeHmcvw/s1600/images+%25281%2529.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="179" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg7tFcCz6Lyc2IDcy0JmmNQNCwHF9ZsjE9xyH1Rw9sb_1KhbnT6JN7YQxLs6Y70Y7yQljf8Thuka5jd9RYH8bsdA5KLLk085MHZ87pqoYgA5kqTCUpGhyFR296sjctEHv9j439HpeHmcvw/s320/images+%25281%2529.jpg" width="320" /></a><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Katie showed a
short trailer of her documentary on press intrusion. The film reflects on the
feelings of key players almost four years after the Leveson Inquiry. Katie Traxton handles the subject with sensitivity;
she manages to create a sense of healing by allowing the subjects of the film a
platform to share the deep emotions that the media intrusion caused in their
lives. The effects on mental well-being
of the victims of press intrusion deserve more investigation. I would love to
write more about this but the documentary is yet to be released and the feelings
shared in the room at this session were not for public airing</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Find out more here:<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><a href="http://webarchive.nationalarchives.gov.uk/20140122145147/http:/www.levesoninquiry.org.uk/" target="_blank">levson inquiry</a></span></b></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Takeaways:<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">How can we support
victims of press intrusion without furthering the sense that we are consuming
their stories for our own pleasure?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">What role
does education have in changing the manner in which we devour sensational news?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Is it
possible to restore ethics in journalism?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">What can be
done to assist young journalists when entering the ‘business of media’ so they
are able to challenge the status-quo without fear of losing commissions? <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Can Positive
Psychology, and Positive Occupational Psychology enter the spaces in which news
is made to change the culture from the top down? <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><u><b>Session: Empathy in Action</b>-
</u><b><u>Baroness Sheila Hollins</u><o:p></o:p></b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b><br /></b></span></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhwo-Jl0IWiqiLMV7cQ00YgSaKQPbpvwfgsLEn32JQt3Vh-cw2wrGxG3RunFZmUs-MfgfXDpzi_TXJ8neWph8KP63TT_UfyqDhQIwJkXmQkU3BOm04PxSgj-IgIf6IwFOW2gb61VIGKWOA/s1600/Baroness%252BHollins.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhwo-Jl0IWiqiLMV7cQ00YgSaKQPbpvwfgsLEn32JQt3Vh-cw2wrGxG3RunFZmUs-MfgfXDpzi_TXJ8neWph8KP63TT_UfyqDhQIwJkXmQkU3BOm04PxSgj-IgIf6IwFOW2gb61VIGKWOA/s320/Baroness%252BHollins.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b><br /></b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>Content:</b><span style="background: white; color: #424242;"> </span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Baroness Hollins shared reflections of
her approach to wellbeing within her life and work, with compassion as ‘empathy
in action’ central to her approach. She asked
us to question our own assumptions about what constitutes a caring society; why
is there a lack of compassion in human services? How could we redress this? How
do you avoid burnout in caring roles? Who looks after the carers? What will
happen if you don’t look after those who are expected to care? When do those inner
resources needed to care for others get a chance to be replenished? Baroness Hollins
belief is that Mental Wealth is about relationships, and in those caring relationships
what is the difference between caring about and caring for? <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-weight: bold;">Find out more here:</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><a href="http://www.rcpsych.ac.uk/usefulresources/rcpsychenewsletters/enewsletters2015/april2015/baronesshollinsinterview.aspx" target="_blank">http://www.rcpsych.ac.uk/usefulresources/rcpsychenewsletters/enewsletters2015/april2015/baronesshollinsinterview.aspx</a></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Takeaways:<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">GRACE is the path to wellbeing: daily practices of giving, receiving,
activity, creating and engagement.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Listening means
you are able to find out what someone wants rather than giving them what you
think they should want.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">We can be
taught to be more empathic – training medical students in empathy generates
quicker recovery in patients.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Individual compassion
needs to be supported with an empathic environment.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">How can we
create a culture of compassion?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><u>Session: Tools To Live By: How to listen and connect to others - with Ruby Wax</u><o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj1bTuU-bDoZH42_fvRl-cZFeGYIHadPO2qW0-ixr7BGJhE5aCQJ0KGdEwD-0Jb0-pCyaLuI4p169aLU8htKJLoBkGVY8mXWYOlstq-3E-Lo2OOXXPHXcb5AQ3XPxmaJVP0uDT8Ie_AZqI/s1600/download+%25282%2529.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj1bTuU-bDoZH42_fvRl-cZFeGYIHadPO2qW0-ixr7BGJhE5aCQJ0KGdEwD-0Jb0-pCyaLuI4p169aLU8htKJLoBkGVY8mXWYOlstq-3E-Lo2OOXXPHXcb5AQ3XPxmaJVP0uDT8Ie_AZqI/s320/download+%25282%2529.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></b></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>Content:</b><span style="background: white; color: #424242;"> </span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">In this culture we’re over-whelmed,
over-loaded, over-stimulated, which takes us out of our minds. Ruby guided
the audience through simple mindfulness practices and explained how mindfulness
helped her to regain her mental wealth. She
talked about how to de-frazzle; techniques to find your own braking system and
highlighted that we can only connect with others when we’re able to think
clearly and calmly. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Find out more here:<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A9xrBM5bfw0" target="_blank">https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A9xrBM5bfw0</a></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Takeaways: <o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Gloria Gaynor
was wrong; I am not what I am, I can be other things due to neuroplasticity.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Become a
watcher of thoughts rather than a victim to them. Achieve this by cultivating
mindfulness.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Notice ‘this
are just my thoughts’ and allow a gap between the thinking and the action.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">It only takes
five minutes of mindfulness a day to build mindful-muscle.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Walk to get
into your body and out of your mind.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><u>Session: Rachel Kelly “How to Walk on Sunshine” Workshop</u><o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjiBH3uKQYXImS6gFrvm8xdVILg3ICzwhnF2uxnCFZ8OJ1AyR3V2mkVoRA45siJFbJWIPZq-W-hfxrbedsHM-Tw-NCZetNzbgE77JpuQ2CE_mMalvEtfdMmt7xSTijiMQ2_fFd9NVfaDX8/s1600/51ZbdLte-sL._SX351_BO1%252C204%252C203%252C200_.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjiBH3uKQYXImS6gFrvm8xdVILg3ICzwhnF2uxnCFZ8OJ1AyR3V2mkVoRA45siJFbJWIPZq-W-hfxrbedsHM-Tw-NCZetNzbgE77JpuQ2CE_mMalvEtfdMmt7xSTijiMQ2_fFd9NVfaDX8/s320/51ZbdLte-sL._SX351_BO1%252C204%252C203%252C200_.jpg" width="226" /></a></div>
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<b style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Content:</b><span style="background: white; color: #424242; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Rachel Kelly asked the audience to
stand if they had experienced mental health problems or had close family or
friends who did. Not surprisingly at an event on mental health, everyone stood
up. She then asked those who felt they had been able to share openly those
experiences to remain standing, there were a handful who didn’t sit. Rachel’s journey back from depression and stress
related mental health problems involved a variety of strategies relating to both
body and mind. During this workshop we were able to experience a taster of some
of the things which worked for Rachel and which can easily be incorporated in
to daily life. Rachel’s steps are simple, don’t require time or money and can
be adapted to make for personal habits that help our Mental Wealth, fostering
resilience and making life fun again.</span></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Find out more here:<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><a href="http://rachel-kelly.net/mental-health-charities/" target="_blank">http://rachel-kelly.net/mental-health-charities/</a></span></b></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Takeaways:<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">When you
focus on your breathe you can’t worry about the future or stress about the
past. You can only breath in the now.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Nutrition
research is likely to offer new mental health solutions in the near future.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Gut health
changes our moods; an imbalance In the stomach creates stress in the brain.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">90% of serotonin
produced in the body is made in the stomach.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Happy foods
are dark green leafy vegetables, omega3s and real chocolate.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><u>Session: What is #MentalMovement? </u><o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiGzdNrDOZgtlHNb0Zk1G7ivcmiGePDik6Gv7ItIyhZJ_SVEv2Qd1DCaEpY44kyhfWyLBXPD_CFQbzGhIVw883P_Pj8rV6OwC0h21R2_F_1QgutJ7a3TZdMfTf21euFKywoIKHXm0DqKWM/s1600/unnamed+%25284%2529.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiGzdNrDOZgtlHNb0Zk1G7ivcmiGePDik6Gv7ItIyhZJ_SVEv2Qd1DCaEpY44kyhfWyLBXPD_CFQbzGhIVw883P_Pj8rV6OwC0h21R2_F_1QgutJ7a3TZdMfTf21euFKywoIKHXm0DqKWM/s320/unnamed+%25284%2529.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Technically not a session,#MentalMovement
had a stand at the festival but as I spent over an hour talking to the
founders, Steph and Emma, I felt as if I had been at a presentation. I hope they are able to deliver a keynote speech
next year because the work they are doing is, in my opinion, fundamental to changing
the way we can change views on mental health when we enable creativity,
communication, and collaboration to flourish. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> #MentalMovement wants to challenge and
re-address the way mental health is dealt with and portrayed. It is online
platform created by writers who have been or are currently, struggling with or
have had a personal experience of mental health. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The stories
are inspiring, uplifting, funny, engaging and the content is positive in its
approach to mental well-being, there is nothing preachy about what they do. #MentalMovement
also looks great, the design is fresh and appealing, and the print version
should be in every venue where young people gather. If I were a student I wouldn’t
feel so alone if I spotted someone else reading #MentalMovement even if I didn’t quite have the courage to
ask how that person felt, I would feel that we are all in this together. There is
something powerfully enlightening in #MentalMovement <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Find out more here:</span></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><a href="http://www.mentalmovement.co.uk/" target="_blank">http://www.mentalmovement.co.uk/</a></span></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Takeaways:<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Can mental health
content be approached in a new way without demeaning the pain of the actual
experience?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">What do we
need to do to reach young people in their own spaces to make it Ok to share?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Being brave
can sometimes be overwhelming?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">How can I
listen in a way that doesn’t feel intrusive?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">What is the
most effective way to support people when they are in the turmoil of mental
confusion?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Which Positive
Psychology Interventions, if any, are most suitable to be adapted in order to
be relevant to this section of society?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">How can we make
the way easier in the future to accept that mental health is part of life and
that sharing our stories of troubled times decreases the power they have over
us? <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Final Thoughts<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj1ZFQGRnOjzwsCMCaDGbDkw2zm2NgDLzLWrAmP_bMOzmMDI8VFcKOyalnzQwvJRAMc8rFeXRjrw61ZKvdRLmDL8rybrrQbVs2xJ1gFP8z8xseLSppSZT7H6CYRU4K1JK6fzMnri0-sMB4/s1600/unnamed+%25285%2529.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj1ZFQGRnOjzwsCMCaDGbDkw2zm2NgDLzLWrAmP_bMOzmMDI8VFcKOyalnzQwvJRAMc8rFeXRjrw61ZKvdRLmDL8rybrrQbVs2xJ1gFP8z8xseLSppSZT7H6CYRU4K1JK6fzMnri0-sMB4/s320/unnamed+%25285%2529.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I meet some
incredibly inspiring people who were very honest and willing to share their
mental health challenges. This event was unique (in my experience) in creating
a community of individuals all being given an equal voice to express their
opinions on how we create, change and tackle our individual well being, as well
as how we manage collective mental wealth. I heard experts share personal
stories of battling with depression, anxiety and addiction alongside the views
of mental health service ‘users’ who have a treasure trove of ideas as to improving the manner in which
they could be helped towards better well-being. I saw raw emotions expressed
with authenticity and received with non-judgement and compassion. The festival felt like a micro-climate of a
caring culture of mental health, a way forward to create a vision of a safe
environment in which we are allowed to communicate the full range of humanness.
As a positive psychologist others occasionally assume I don’t do ‘negative
feelings’, PP however poses questions relating to the way we need the full rich
range of emotions in order to flourish; to embrace every aspect of our
psychologically make up in order to explore the potential we all have. The Mental Wealth Festival challenged me to
examine my personal beliefs and attitudes towards my own, and others mental well-being. There is so much we can do to
get this message out. Thank you to everyone involved in creating the Mental
Wealth Festival. </span></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Takeaway: What can I do to help? <o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">As an
individual I start with myself; I can share my stories, my hopes, and my
strategies for mental wealth. I can lead by example. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh6FRAXU7sLolajpfnVlexS8A7rhqcX0HQTDc4btzAfxpq5qX3MLh2kEzM2CexKDR4hUsfCAlnGaqUb9MmJAetW14_KrVxaFfunZ5V2JGJcUnkniCMHF30zvt9QnoAf7lPF6fCh7q-cCI4/s1600/unnamed+%25281%2529.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh6FRAXU7sLolajpfnVlexS8A7rhqcX0HQTDc4btzAfxpq5qX3MLh2kEzM2CexKDR4hUsfCAlnGaqUb9MmJAetW14_KrVxaFfunZ5V2JGJcUnkniCMHF30zvt9QnoAf7lPF6fCh7q-cCI4/s320/unnamed+%25281%2529.jpg" width="320" /></a><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">As a
researcher I can find ways to make my studies relevant and tangible to increase
others mental wealth. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">As a coach I
can be there to listen and support.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I can always
lighten the burden by bringing the topic around to the positive impact of shoes
on our mental health. (Which I did at the end of Paul Dolan’s talk hence the
photo!)<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I’m not a
social media ‘expert’ (my tee-shirt states ‘I don’t know’) but I do feel that
it can be harnessed to get a positive message across - Is there a story you
would like to share that could help others? I’d love to help you to share it. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">T</span><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">hank you</span></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Photo credit:<b> </b></span><span style="background-color: white;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Philip Hardman Photography</span></span><span style="background-color: white; color: #1f497d; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;"> <a href="http://-www.philiphardmanphotography.com/" target="_blank">-www.philiphardmanphotography.com</a></span><span style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: 16px;"> </span></div>
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<span style="color: #222222; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="background-color: white;">City Lit Team <a href="http://www.citylit.ac.uk/" target="_blank">http://www.citylit.ac.uk/</a></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Everyone at BooksBeyondWords <a href="http://booksbeyondwords.co.uk/" target="_blank">http://booksbeyondwords.co.uk/</a></span></div>
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10toshinehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12263916978396798526noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1842368037976453572.post-12943744906121486892016-09-13T04:25:00.001-07:002016-09-13T04:25:33.950-07:00Applying research based lessons to one’s own life<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhyfyI9QF-9PB7stQfMfTQPiwE9WBOAF-8zPXfRPeOj3p0W8krq5K1Np7qOdh47FKFxoazaG9l3DUsMTapBvvlRlmK_ijaOkGF62Nv72v-h6REfhAb1nx_e8sVdrVa9WPkfbtxrugnnUog/s1600/20160907_195041.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhyfyI9QF-9PB7stQfMfTQPiwE9WBOAF-8zPXfRPeOj3p0W8krq5K1Np7qOdh47FKFxoazaG9l3DUsMTapBvvlRlmK_ijaOkGF62Nv72v-h6REfhAb1nx_e8sVdrVa9WPkfbtxrugnnUog/s640/20160907_195041.jpg" width="360" /></a></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg_m__E9yAa7AH27OCBc3fKcSuNTq70z5XuO4MlK9oWHvkkcDpUJeC8pjvmT-CxoeTXCYQD1Al3wV9PhNy5sBhqljAykf1ZXbAmzpJFD1qPZxRLfhPwhn8li9rNSqPTQozfXniqvor85V4/s1600/20160907_195041.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"></span></a><br />
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Being a bit of a ‘wannabe’ academic I like attend anything and everything in London which will further my understanding of psychology. This week I went along to the <a href="http://www.bps.org.uk/networks-and-communities/member-microsite/london-home-counties-branch" target="_blank">London & Home countie</a>s branch of the <a href="http://bps.org.uk/" target="_blank">British Psychology Society</a> to find out more about applying psychology research to my own life. The ‘Applied’ aspect of the MAPPCP I am studying is my favourite feature of the course, given a chance I will experiment on myself all the time. Any new intervention I come across is added to my growing list of ‘How to be Happy’. There is no rationale for this, whatever works for me I apply. I didn’t conduct a baseline test of my SWB before MAPP but I have a feeling that I have grown in wellbeing whilst studying at UEL; I’m bouncier , more confident, even cheerier than I previously was. I feel more ME.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEixEauGXXwI-TJ50clZQzZ2Bs5Au2n6VRWATpWF2GnanBFaHlPbUtLriFih2sLsawQG8jMi5rG2-2Mh2CSs_wlPAp7_5cOIwqKxQib_7rSBu9RilQ5JvihHY509afMPzMGCG02PaPUOs9Q/s1600/Office-Man-And-Woman-Puppets-Puppeteer-In-Suit.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEixEauGXXwI-TJ50clZQzZ2Bs5Au2n6VRWATpWF2GnanBFaHlPbUtLriFih2sLsawQG8jMi5rG2-2Mh2CSs_wlPAp7_5cOIwqKxQib_7rSBu9RilQ5JvihHY509afMPzMGCG02PaPUOs9Q/s400/Office-Man-And-Woman-Puppets-Puppeteer-In-Suit.jpg" width="400" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">The first
speaker was <a href="http://www.psychologywriter.org.uk/Index/Welcome.html" target="_blank">Christian Jarrett</a>, sharing tips for using psychology to get people
to do what you want. Not in the least unethical apparently. We are allowed as
Psychologists to use this knowledge to get our own way. Isn’t that
amazing? </span><br />
<span style="font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif;">We can legitimately carry out
slightly dodgy ‘studies’ to prove that people’s power of persuasion can be
replicated. My favourite piece of research that Christian shared related to
some male</span><a href="https://digest.bps.org.uk/2007/05/30/the-power-of-a-light-touch-on-the-arm/" style="font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif;" target="_blank"> French researchers</a><span style="font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif;"> getting girls phone numbers or asking them to
dance by lightly touching them on the arm. </span><a href="http://www.bbc.com/future/story/20160708-the-mind-tricks-to-get-better-tips" style="font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif;" target="_blank">Waiters</a><span style="font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif;"> also use this trick to get a
bigger tip!</span></div>
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<a href="http://www.hbs.edu/faculty/Publication%20Files/Brooks%20Dai%20Schweitzer%202013_d2f61dc9-ec1b-485d-a815-2cf25746de50.pdf" target="_blank">apologise for the rain</a> then ask if you can borrow someone’s phone they are more
likely to comply and you if scare someone before asking for a <a href="http://uk.businessinsider.com/psychological-tricks-to-influence-people-2015-8?r=US&IR=T" target="_blank">favour</a> they may
well agree as fear creates a distraction. Playing happy background music that
is familiar to the listener has a similar power and you can ward off possible
muggers by utilising the theory of <a href="http://www.personalityresearch.org/acton/meta-analysis.html" target="_blank">interpersonal complementarity. </a><o:p></o:p></span><br />
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<u><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Christian Jarrett’s 5 top tips for getting what you want</span></u><br />
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<li><span style="text-indent: -18pt;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"> Use <a href="https://www.psychologytoday.com/articles/201303/the-power-touch" target="_blank">the power of touch</a></span></span></li>
</ul>
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<li><span style="text-indent: -18pt;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"> <a href="http://www.hbs.edu/faculty/Pages/item.aspx?num=45471" target="_blank">Aplogise for the rain</a></span></span></li>
</ul>
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<li><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="text-indent: -18pt;"> </span><span style="text-indent: -18pt;">Use <a href="http://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S002210319791341X" target="_blank">the fear then relief trick</a></span></span></li>
</ul>
<ul>
<li><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="text-indent: -18pt;"> </span><span style="text-indent: -18pt;">Play <a href="http://www.news.cornell.edu/stories/2016/08/study-happy-music-sparks-cooperation-teamwork" target="_blank">happy music</a></span></span></li>
</ul>
<ul>
<li><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="text-indent: -18pt;"> </span><span style="text-indent: -18pt;">Utilise interpersonal complementarity</span><span style="text-indent: -18pt;"> </span></span></li>
</ul>
<u><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span></u></div>
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">My takeaway was
people are more <a href="https://thepsychologist.bps.org.uk/volume-21/edition-4/mind-wide-open" target="_blank">obedient</a> than you think and you are more persuasive than you
think, but at the end of the day manners and saying<a href="http://www.dailymail.co.uk/sciencetech/article-2747790/Why-say-thank-It-s-not-just-good-manners-two-words-help-maintain-relationships-study-claims.html" target="_blank"> please</a> when asking for a request
really does the trick.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">I’m wondering
how to incorporate all of the above into getting my own way more often so if I
bump into you in the street and pretend I know you, touch your arm as I say
sorry for the awful weather whilst humming ‘singing in the rain’ then ask to borrow a fiver please …well
you’ve been warned!</span><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjte4SKiTOaz9aCR9krg8GSGzrdpoSvLaFbepGME4Ga88ZFLG_DhsVvgZMAlg5fFxx2Q4xZ3yLH2u-XUIydMEhN_sySQcKe2b6fBAQPTjobP-uZaAeX3PxEUqyQn_AXRP74v6CsynPrx3k/s1600/Please-Note-In-Hand-Picture.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="257" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjte4SKiTOaz9aCR9krg8GSGzrdpoSvLaFbepGME4Ga88ZFLG_DhsVvgZMAlg5fFxx2Q4xZ3yLH2u-XUIydMEhN_sySQcKe2b6fBAQPTjobP-uZaAeX3PxEUqyQn_AXRP74v6CsynPrx3k/s320/Please-Note-In-Hand-Picture.jpg" width="320" /></a></span></div>
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">The second
speaker of the evening was Dr <a href="https://uel.ac.uk/Staff/t/aneta-tunariu" target="_blank">Aneta Tunariu </a>who spoke of her own experiences in learning to become a psychologist and how she applied each aspect of her
training to her own life. The phrase that really resonated with me was <b><i>‘to
develop professionally is to develop personally</i></b>’. I feel that the process of being in positive psychology education has made me
a better person; I am not only more intellectually aware but my emotional
intelligence is greater, in applying PP
interventions to my own life I am becoming the version of myself I had hoped was there all along. In overcoming my academic limitations I have
<b><i>“strengthened and expanded my resilience as an adaptation to the environment” </i></b> which Aneta explains as happening when we are
mindful of -<o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhUWq7nf4HEQCjLB_wFRiOPfEdzrbbkIqIwT_WEzyrUAzTTVxpQFEaB5T1F0wdxNWVvErknZ19Kbb5R0-xYMBcXBGc2nsIZKRIS0zwpwoqs7dzYjGErKZX2uUVYCZlB5SurzHI5mQIGwx8/s1600/choiceequalsopportunity.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif; margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center; text-indent: -18pt;"><img border="0" height="266" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhUWq7nf4HEQCjLB_wFRiOPfEdzrbbkIqIwT_WEzyrUAzTTVxpQFEaB5T1F0wdxNWVvErknZ19Kbb5R0-xYMBcXBGc2nsIZKRIS0zwpwoqs7dzYjGErKZX2uUVYCZlB5SurzHI5mQIGwx8/s400/choiceequalsopportunity.jpg" width="400" /></a></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpFirst" style="mso-list: l0 level1 lfo2; text-indent: -18.0pt;">
<br />
<ul style="text-indent: 0px;">
<li><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="text-indent: -18pt;"><span style="font-size: 7pt; font-stretch: normal;"> </span></span><span style="text-indent: -18pt;">What I am</span></span></li>
</ul>
<ul style="text-indent: 0px;">
<li><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="text-indent: -18pt;"><span style="font-size: 7pt; font-stretch: normal;"> </span></span><span style="text-indent: -18pt;">What I can</span></span></li>
</ul>
<ul style="text-indent: 0px;">
<li><span style="text-indent: -18pt;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"> What I have</span></span></li>
</ul>
<ul style="text-indent: 0px;">
<li><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="text-indent: -18pt;"><span style="font-size: 7pt; font-stretch: normal;"> </span></span><span style="text-indent: -18pt;">Choice: responsibility to choose and my own choice.</span></span></li>
</ul>
<ul>
</ul>
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<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Aneta also
talked of the links with positive emotions, wellbeing and personal growth,
sharing <a href="https://www.positivityratio.com/" target="_blank">Barabra Fredricksons</a> research results and how they can be applied. I need to work on getting my positivity ratio up to the magic 3:1! <o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span data-reactid="22" id="yui_3_14_1_1_1473764641392_371" style="background-color: white; color: #111111; line-height: 21px;"><span class="foldable-text" data-reactid="23" id="yui_3_14_1_1_1473764641392_370"><span class="text-with-line-breaks"><span class="Linkify"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><a href="https://www.researchgate.net/project/iNEAR-a-culturally-adapted-positive-psychology-coaching-programme-for-resilience-and-wellbeing-in-different-contexts" target="_blank">iNEAR</a> is Aneta's recently designed psychological intervention informed by existential philosophy, positive psychology, developmental coaching, social psychology and psychotherapy. It has been successfully piloted at a large school in South East England and is also being tested as a framework for positive psychology coaching. </span></span></span></span></span><br />
<span data-reactid="22" style="background-color: white; color: #111111; line-height: 21px;"><span class="foldable-text" data-reactid="23"><span class="text-with-line-breaks"><span class="Linkify"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></span></span></span></span></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg4qAXwTlNvBpT0qDmh58mNNxVr-bc-gNLyuGMNB5hVeSF-nmwsWP-JvyhOudRe6E9nA0hqq5z6Bq5ARqiBjUCISffUBXWMk7Tbp1AZcX11p0p-Yw9XIYSqaeqwFZa6PWMf6kNn4w2fq-Y/s1600/habit-2.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><img border="0" height="169" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg4qAXwTlNvBpT0qDmh58mNNxVr-bc-gNLyuGMNB5hVeSF-nmwsWP-JvyhOudRe6E9nA0hqq5z6Bq5ARqiBjUCISffUBXWMk7Tbp1AZcX11p0p-Yw9XIYSqaeqwFZa6PWMf6kNn4w2fq-Y/s320/habit-2.jpg" width="320" /></span></a></div>
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif";"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">My favourite
takeaway from her presentation was her parting slide<i><b> ‘ We first develop habits
then habits develop us’</b></i>. I think one of the ways that I have applied research
based lessons to my own personal growth is by acquiring the habit of
mindfulness and mindfulness has developed me towards being kinder, more
compassionate, more understanding and I have gained greater clarity. Good
habits make us happy. If research can inform us how to cultivate habits that
make us, and the world around us, better then I will happily try them out and
may even try to come up with some new studies to provide supporting evidence.</span><span style="font-family: "arial" , sans-serif;"><o:p></o:p></span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif";"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span></span>
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif";"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">I would love to hear how you make research work for you? Have you tried any awesome PPIs? Does your own research provide you with new ways of being?</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif";"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Let me know what works and how? </span></span><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif";"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhFH4lWP9IBp3i7iGB-pDm7nBU99IrtBEV_B8NZZl5c0V8QmRWUsxWR4ZAni5JmjIwH865G-rHGrYw4XHc8UC_SfkCsXOaDCgqZ97yVBhBGb-dqUElu9rNFcqx43ZY1WtpLiLmM7SU_id0/s1600/4c562f5153e12f7e18e18e38c8cc4971.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhFH4lWP9IBp3i7iGB-pDm7nBU99IrtBEV_B8NZZl5c0V8QmRWUsxWR4ZAni5JmjIwH865G-rHGrYw4XHc8UC_SfkCsXOaDCgqZ97yVBhBGb-dqUElu9rNFcqx43ZY1WtpLiLmM7SU_id0/s400/4c562f5153e12f7e18e18e38c8cc4971.jpg" width="300" /></a></span></span></div>
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10toshinehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12263916978396798526noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1842368037976453572.post-24966284456051391772016-08-14T12:20:00.001-07:002016-08-14T23:01:33.654-07:00ColourWalking: Vibrant Flaneurs, A Moving Art Form Through the Streets of London.<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj4jDFduT3in9ukmtD-ZVP0EdAfRcHB8ZeVGqUK3M8qfcQYrlUvNPirrnaX6ZxABoT5_lqY5sMZRr-G5N8zUwO2o5VLZZyXhVq0LjN8BM1Qt8y6C7zg2FSceZ5K-oGSYCBoG7pKxmElstI/s1600/IMG_20160814_191338.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj4jDFduT3in9ukmtD-ZVP0EdAfRcHB8ZeVGqUK3M8qfcQYrlUvNPirrnaX6ZxABoT5_lqY5sMZRr-G5N8zUwO2o5VLZZyXhVq0LjN8BM1Qt8y6C7zg2FSceZ5K-oGSYCBoG7pKxmElstI/s200/IMG_20160814_191338.jpg" width="200" /></a></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif";"><b>ColourWalking:
Vibrant Flaneurs</b><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif";">Galina is a
stylist and owns a vintage store, <a href="https://www.facebook.com/GiGis-Dressing-Room-408189179247374/" target="_blank">Gigi’s Dressing Room</a> in Walthamstow, East
London. I met Galina at ‘ColourWalk’, an initiative she launched 5 months ago
as a way to bring together the colourful personalities she had collected
through her distinctive way of dressing and being.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif";">She kindly
agreed to meet up at Gigi’s to tell me about her philosophy and how she started
the ColourWalk.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif";">How did ColourWalk come about?<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif";"><br /></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif";">I was
influenced by <a href="http://www.advanced.style/" target="_blank">AdvancedStyle</a>,</span><span class="MsoCommentReference"><span style="font-size: 9.0pt; line-height: 200%;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif";">I looked at what they were doing, and
I thought they are just getting dressed up, walking around New York. So I put up a<a href="https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1151900132" target="_blank"> Facebook</a> page and said ‘who
wants to dress up and get together?’ And it became a celebration of who we are
and how we dress. The first ColourWalk was at the <a href="http://www.vam.ac.uk/" target="_blank">V&A</a>, we wandered and
chatted. I was thrilled <a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Molly_Parkin" target="_blank">Molly Parkin</a> came along, she has been an inspiration to
me, and it was lovely she joined us. We
all just support each other with the way we express ourselves through our way
of dressing, we love being creative. I used to think that I would need to find
ways to fund a foundation, to change the world in a big way, but you know this
is what I can do every day…..just be me. If I can be a little bit of
inspiration, if I can connect with people and share my values, then that’s
enough.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif";">The
ColourWalk has already been forging new connections with amazing women like <a href="http://www.suekreitzman.com/" target="_blank">Sue Kreitzman,</a> who attended the last one at <a href="http://www.spitalfields.co.uk/" target="_blank">Spitalfields</a>, and now Advanced Style
are saying ‘shall we do a ColourWalk?’ As
Galina says, “they influenced me and then it goes back around….It’s always been
about sharing ideas and collaborating for me. I don’t see this as ‘mine’ it’s
for all of us to have fun with. I don’t have an agenda. It’s not like it’s a
movement that I want to control! And ColourWalk is about all shapes, sizes,
ages, colour, it’s about diversity and commonality. It’s for everyone to enjoy.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif";">Where do these ideas come from?<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif";"><br /></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif";">I grew up
under communism, I didn’t have much opportunity to be creative, that side of me
was quite suppressed, I was sunny on the outside as a child but inside I was a
little bit depressed. I couldn’t express myself. Not with the way I dressed,
there was very little choice. But my grandmother had a sewing machine and I
took her sixties pieces and reworked them for myself so even then I was
beginning to take some control of how I looked. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif";">Then at
eighteen I came to London and it was like Alice in Wonderland. I went to Epsom Antique Market and I just went crazy. All the colours and all the choice; such
a contrast to the greyness of growing up in Bulgaria. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif";">And then I
had my children, I was still quite young, for a while I wasn’t so interested in
how I looked. When the children started school other mothers would ask about my
clothes and I’d say come to the house and they would try stuff on and borrow
things. I would style them; that would bring about changes in the way they saw
themselves. I realised then that this was a kind of way of doing therapy. I had
intended to go back to education and train in psychology but suddenly I had
this business and it didn’t feel relevant to train as a counsellor. I seemed to
naturally influence people to try something different, to step out of their
comfort zone. We all have a need to express ourselves, to be creative, if I can
encourage that, if I can help someone find out a bit more about who they are,
to be brave and show themselves, then that feels good. And that’s what
happens at Gigi’s. When clients say they have been ‘Gigified’ and they feel so
much better, it makes me happy. I’m playing a small part in making it better
for someone.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif";">How does the way you dress reflect who
you are?<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif";"><br /></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif";">When I wake
up in the morning I look around my wardrobe and this item jumps out; so it
makes me look a certain way and my outfit of the day is literally 100%
reflection of my mood; of my vibration. Sometimes I feel down and I think I can
change this. I accept that feeling of being sad, I’m not denying those
feelings, but when I’m like that then that’s when I will choose something that
is even more outrageous. I don’t want to hide away on those days. I will
deliberately put myself in a position where I get more attention. I will
embrace my attention seeking inner little child! I want to maintain a sense of
humility but there is a difference between that and putting yourself down. When
I dress in this way, when I am authentic, I communicate with more people, I
make relationships and straight away that makes me feel better. And those
connections make others feel good too. And I am inspired to play with my
identity to forge more links to others and we create this cycle of inspiration.
And it’s all because of the manner in which I dress.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif";">Do you see Dress as having a way to
make not just an individual happier but having a bigger part to play in the
world?<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif";"><br /></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif";">So on a
personal level when I suppress who I am it makes me unhappy, why I should be a
particular way to suit others? I don’t want to fragmentize my personality, to
split off my creativity; I want to express all of me so I can be a fully
nuanced person. I can be quite political in the way I mix up the symbolism in
how I dress; I take different cultural references and wear them together. This
often leads to a dialogue. That’s good.
I want to spark off ideas and debate. My clothes do that. People stop me
in the street and they may not always be complimentary but we talk and who knows they may go home and think yes we are all the same really. In this part
of London we have such a mix of cultures it’s good to learn about each other,
we are all humans underneath, I may not agree with your views but I can try to
understand them. I want to create a community where we are all accepted, I do
that in my own little way in Gigi’s. People drop by to chat and try on clothes
and play with the way they look, people from all backgrounds and communities.
It’s all-encompassing. That’s my vision that we all get along together, no one
is left out. I start with myself, my ideas about fashion, and colour and the
arts and how they have helped me, then I hope that my way helps others; that my
love, of creativity, colour, way of being, expands and brings about healing and
forgiveness. We can all share that. I don’t see fashion as being superficial if
it can help me with these goals.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjpLunGI_vU960FLbxrJuHQxpcy-I97RlUbCg2rM0JUDENqC_o3xBOzAYTzpOtl9NTwq6Io1yPhidy1USOQ75D-64ONbbHQ9mk6HweJH2DaPxa0A-8XOOG5iKbbH650Sd_QLmm206aKBYw/s1600/2016-08-14+19.53.12.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjpLunGI_vU960FLbxrJuHQxpcy-I97RlUbCg2rM0JUDENqC_o3xBOzAYTzpOtl9NTwq6Io1yPhidy1USOQ75D-64ONbbHQ9mk6HweJH2DaPxa0A-8XOOG5iKbbH650Sd_QLmm206aKBYw/s200/2016-08-14+19.53.12.jpg" width="200" /></a></div>
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<b>Gigi's Dresing Room</b></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<o:p></o:p><br />
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif";">My Reflections<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif";"><br /></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif";">Galina shared
so much with me during our chat. She has a beautiful philosophy on life. I can
see how transformative her way of looking at the world is for her clients, she
is nurturing, kind and encouraging. There is no sense that her way of dressing
is right for everyone, but she inspires others to find their own way of being
that can be expressed in the way that they dress. I love her vision for the
unifying qualities that fashion can have for communities. The ColourWalk is a
simple, tangible way of connecting people to each other, to walk and talk and
experience a time and space together that is constrained only by a love of
self-expression; like colourful Flaneurs, a moving art form through the streets
of London.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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10toshinehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12263916978396798526noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1842368037976453572.post-71223959923765797772016-07-28T02:39:00.001-07:002016-07-28T02:39:06.032-07:00A journey from Ego to Selflessness in Elite Sport.<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiexMDzCvf7s62b5gStMw3rpGZljKZAZcM8VaXK8pRkyEh0KgGjAsj46BVj0KGsEPSda_EvbBMlJJQZk0ltixBHkbUwyOoNDfkOIBLJg103OP15axeDKF4NOajY9PCSKj6CJKMjC8HItFQ/s1600/2016-07-28+10.21.13.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiexMDzCvf7s62b5gStMw3rpGZljKZAZcM8VaXK8pRkyEh0KgGjAsj46BVj0KGsEPSda_EvbBMlJJQZk0ltixBHkbUwyOoNDfkOIBLJg103OP15axeDKF4NOajY9PCSKj6CJKMjC8HItFQ/s320/2016-07-28+10.21.13.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I have never given much thought to sports psychology; I will
skip references to sport when they are introduced even by my favourite researcher,<a href="http://www.mckinsey.com/business-functions/organization/our-insights/whartons-adam-grant-on-the-key-to-professional-success" target="_blank">Adam</a> Grant. It sometimes feels as if male positive psychology writers all
conspire to introduce ‘soccer’ into any book. I do
however appreciate the cross over with leadership across all areas and in the
interest of expanding my knowledge attended a talk at the <a href="http://www.bps.org.uk/events" target="_blank">BPS</a> in London by sports psychologist <a href="http://withoutego.com/leadership/" target="_blank">SteveSylvester. </a><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Steve shared his personal journey on ego mountain and his discovery of the selfless route. He explored his career as both a professional sportsman
and psychologist to highlight the way in which his own ego challenged the
success (and otherwise) of his career. He detailed of how he was able to trace the
variations in his results by looking at his own ‘ME’ focus and how his research
has continued to show a correlation between selflessness and winning across
many sports.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Steve’s research methodology is time consuming and
meticulous, he observes and listens to both individuals and teams, evidence
gathering without judgement, before collecting data with in-depth interviews and
group discussions. His qualitative research seems to produce rich layers of
information at both micro and macro level; ideas that can be applied to individuals,
teams and the culture of contemporary sports. His findings challenge the assumptions
that in order to win we must be focused on beating others rather than being the
best version of ourselves. The line that
kept occurring to me was ‘there is no I in team’. Looking through a PP lens
many of his discoveries tally with concepts of flourishing, flow and
mindfulness. I especially like his views on giving, they reflect Adam Grant’s
work in showing that, contrary to popular expectations, when we ask how can I
help rather than what can I get from this situation we create personal success
as well as promoting collective success. In sports we expect the individual to
be the centre of their universe; Steve’s work shows that when the motivation to
be the best comes from a more collective mindset everyone wins. He told anecdotes
about times when the difference between ‘about to fail’ and going on to win were
attributable to an outward-looking mindset; the desire to be authentically your
best for those you love or the team rather than forcing a ‘I
must win or else’ approach. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Steve has developed simple steps to enable his research to
be applied to all areas of life. Detox your
EGO, is a straight forward approach to losing ‘What is it about for me?’ To
becoming ‘What can I do for others?’<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>Takeaways for me last night include:</b><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<li><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">What do I avoid about myself?</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Are my heart and mind aligned?</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Am I having fun? Is everyday a Saturday?</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Do I seek evidence that I am ‘good’ or ‘bad’ or am I able to
just accept?</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Can I tolerate ambiguity?</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">What’s going on below the surface?</span></li>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">My favourite insight from the evening is ‘How can I create a
bright sunny internal climate when I perform?’
As a coach and practitioner I hope to generate environments in which my
clients are able to flourish; in my own personal way of ‘being a coach’ rather than
‘coaching’ I want to lead others to shine. I want to lose my EGO and run naked with Balloons! (note to self :perhaps not whilst coaching.)<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEghXufnWtTVTMAPUYsVGCU_woomcSk2pULfbY0ihMgh1oxRrNfikTLxImriqwfbQWbdZzx0LYULtbTFw5Xp2UvClEKEJLRU9HJJtpyQnAFQqx_k7t6AXvNUx7EWHGzvfpslW3eVCZqwhpM/s1600/IMG_20160728_083507.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEghXufnWtTVTMAPUYsVGCU_woomcSk2pULfbY0ihMgh1oxRrNfikTLxImriqwfbQWbdZzx0LYULtbTFw5Xp2UvClEKEJLRU9HJJtpyQnAFQqx_k7t6AXvNUx7EWHGzvfpslW3eVCZqwhpM/s200/IMG_20160728_083507.jpg" width="200" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Steve has a vision of elite sports leaders who show us a new
way to behave, to reflect positive personal selflessness that we can all model.
His work with schools to teach children that you can be ‘nice and a winner’ is
taking his research to the next generation of champions. I was left last night with questions about
applying this research to politics and leadership. Do female leaders find it
easier to adapt these views to creating flourishing cultures? Are there studies
exploring gender differences in selflessness, success and sports? To what extent is a positive psychology sport
coaching culture affecting the way that male dominated sports, such as football,
are enabling men to explore their mental health and well-being? Can we as
coaches use this research to encourage better ‘Mental Wealth’ in a population (men)
that has been traditionally more resistant to self-reflection? And yes I am
Aware that I have many gender stereotypes going on here but the views in the
room last night appear to confirm that male sportsmen still feel that expressing
emotions may make them look weak.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">By his own admission Steve is still surprised that his research
consistently uncovers the same results, I’m looking forward to seeing more real
life evidence. So how likely are we to
see a culture of kindness in the premiere league this season? And what will
this mean at Stamford Bridge? Can I look forward to more hugs and smiles at
home games?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>Find out more at:</b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=enecpU186oE" target="_blank">https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=enecpU186oE</a></span></div>
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<a href="http://www.londonlive.co.uk/news/2016-05-12/steven-sylvester" target="_blank">http://www.londonlive.co.uk/news/2016-05-12/steven-sylvester</a></div>
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<a href="http://www.adamgrant.net/" target="_blank">http://www.adamgrant.net/</a></div>
10toshinehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12263916978396798526noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1842368037976453572.post-53654060570770411512016-07-24T05:25:00.000-07:002016-07-24T06:59:50.926-07:00Collaboration,Community & Creativity: ECPP 2016 (Part 2)<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhaUPEksHhet703EO9hTQxj-JWLpbAznmPQUJJT54BuSyIWuJzZwKszxf92XSklcNdbnOVzVMFfzM-NwJiLLhb70RNS0IX9Gib6tVwGLYmOrmijhw-iXN-5hwzEwV2osiXehlmLlPlzRqM/s1600/angers+art.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="261" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhaUPEksHhet703EO9hTQxj-JWLpbAznmPQUJJT54BuSyIWuJzZwKszxf92XSklcNdbnOVzVMFfzM-NwJiLLhb70RNS0IX9Gib6tVwGLYmOrmijhw-iXN-5hwzEwV2osiXehlmLlPlzRqM/s400/angers+art.jpg" width="400" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Disclaimer: I am not a scientist. My background is in the
arts and I am still reflecting on why any ‘proper’ science department would
have taken me on board to study for a master’s in Psychology. </span><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"> </span><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">So thank you, UEL, for taking that risk!</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">The ECPP 2016 was my first chance to experience the positive
psychology world beyond UEL. I was expecting experiential happiness. I was
looking for others to creatively collaborate with in order to feel I belonged
in this community of ‘clever, proper scientists’. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">As someone whose signature strengths include creativity and
a love of beauty and excellence, I was looking for ways to explore these areas
at ECPP. At first glance, the programme didn’t
seem to offer any such opportunity. Where was the art and creativity? The programme
had two entries mentioning creativity: <a href="https://s3-ap-southeast-2.amazonaws.com/wh1.thewebconsole.com/wh/1564/images/Impact_of_Emotions_on_Creativity_2014_Handout_ECPP.pdf" target="_blank">Sue Langley</a> – who was <a href="http://suelangley.com/work/research-report-impact-emotions-creativity/" target="_blank">using emotions intelligently</a> to enhance <a href="http://langleygroup.com.au/work/neuroscience-of-creativity-keynote/" target="_blank">creativity</a> and innovation, and Auguste Dumouilla – whose
poster was about creativity, emotion and well-being.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Due to the hectic nature of the conference, I didn’t get to
Sue’s session or find Auguste’s poster. </span><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">However, I did find plenty of creativity to celebrate in
Angers:</span></div>
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<li><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="text-indent: -18pt;"><span style="font-size: 7pt; font-stretch: normal;"> </span></span><span style="text-indent: -18pt;">The conference centre was teaming with individuals
expressing themselves through the way they dressed; so much research material for
my flourishing fashion project and an Instagram feed on its own!<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEibUH9b88YtGSbbI0SkT97OA-RzI0mRZLVjZ7YUc8lhCJTMhM_xkWbj_HQaxNxo2ndw_pyFFSRSCoJM8Ej25FGXBpdrTnjugTUwLL98Jty08deXh7khkZ0Lol7JlJScrgG6lghyhpyP4s4/s1600/20160701_113735.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEibUH9b88YtGSbbI0SkT97OA-RzI0mRZLVjZ7YUc8lhCJTMhM_xkWbj_HQaxNxo2ndw_pyFFSRSCoJM8Ej25FGXBpdrTnjugTUwLL98Jty08deXh7khkZ0Lol7JlJScrgG6lghyhpyP4s4/s320/20160701_113735.jpg" width="180" /></a></div>
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<li><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="text-indent: -18pt;">There was also a constant thread running through
the keynotes I attended that in order for PP to evolve we need to look outside
of the sciences and reach across to other disciplines; collaborations which harness
divergent views to create original</span><span style="text-indent: -18pt;"> </span><span style="text-indent: -18pt;">outcomes.</span></span></li>
</ul>
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<li><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="text-indent: -18pt;"><span style="font-size: 7pt; font-stretch: normal;"> </span></span><span style="text-indent: -18pt;">Coaching Psychology and creativity: I attended a
symposium on coaching and PP, perfect partners for systemic change in which all
of the speakers expressed creativity in the manner they presented as well as
the content.</span></span></li>
</ul>
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<li><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="text-indent: -18pt;"><span style="font-size: 7pt; font-stretch: normal;"> </span></span><span style="text-indent: -18pt;">Illona Boniwell’s closing keynote called for ‘making
PP tangible’ which to my ears was a shout out to arts, crafts and design to get
involved.</span></span></li>
</ul>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">My vision for interdisciplinary collaboration to form a
positive psychology art community begins with the very spaces the science of PP
already inhabits: universities. UEL is a centre for amazing arts education. I
would love to see the Psychology Department reaching out to the arts in order to create a bi-directional
culture of sharing research and ideas. Art graduates would benefit from accessing
the wellbeing interventions that applied PP has to offer. Stress levels of the
staff could be reduced with individual PP coaching, perhaps using coaching
students who had a particular interest in creative practises to offer lunchtime
sessions. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">The architects could collaborate
on ways to make environments of flourishing informed by PP research. Research for
innovative ways to make PP concrete would be enhanced by designers who aren’t
constrained by the boundaries of science. Who better to take a complex concept and make
it useable than artists? It’s what they do in every area of their work. And of
course the fashion department could make collections that make us all happy! <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">On my last afternoon, I explored Angers galleries with a friend;
bonding over art is one of my favourite experiences. There is a very special connection
that occurs when we share the feelings that surface when we encounter art. I
have ‘coached’ whilst wondering in galleries, the impact of imagery on allowing
creative ways to surface never ceases to amaze. That very personal end to my
first PP conference shaped my overall impression of the event.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">If the success, on an individual level, of a conference is
making one contact and finding one piece of inspiration then ECPP 2016 exceeded
that. I came away with so many ideas that it has taken me a month to filter
them and make any sense of where they fit with my personal vision. (I am a percolator
not a procrastinator!) I cemented existing connections and made new contacts
with positive people from all over the world. I hope that in sharing my ideas
about the conference on social media I will continue to form new associations
that offer me opportunities to hear differing opinions and perspectives. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">On the flight home – so full of positive people that the
cabin was buzzing with energy – I chatted with Felicia Huppert. It’s always exciting
when you can talk to one of your heroes, I mentioned how well her dress had
stood out at her keynote speech and the impact it had from the back of the
auditorium. She replied: “that’s my happy dress, I wore it for a special birthday
and it always makes me feel good.” I apologise for not asking if I can use the
quote, Felicia, but the validation you gave my research made me feel as if
there is a place for me in Positive Psychology. Perhaps fashion and PP is the
perfect fusion.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">I went to Angers looking for the three ‘C’s: collaboration, community
and creativity; I found them. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">PS : in case you missed Tim Lomas’s paper on PP and Arts the
link is here: <a href="https://www.researchgate.net/publication/299882200_Positive_Art_Artistic_Expression_and_Appreciation_as_an_Exemplary_Vehicle_for_Flourishing" target="_blank">https://www.researchgate.net/publication/299882200_Positive_Art_Artistic_Expression_and_Appreciation_as_an_Exemplary_Vehicle_for_Flourishing</a></span><o:p></o:p></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">For more inspiration on links between art and well-being: </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><a href="http://repository.upenn.edu/cgi/viewcontent.cgi?article=2866&context=edissertations" target="_blank">http://repository.upenn.edu/cgi/viewcontent.cgi?article=2866&context=edissertations</a></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><a href="http://blogs.scientificamerican.com/beautiful-minds/the-creative-life-and-well-being/" target="_blank">http://blogs.scientificamerican.com/beautiful-minds/the-creative-life-and-well-being/</a></span></div>
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<a href="https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/positive-psychology-in-the-classroom/201211/the-art-positive-psychology" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;" target="_blank">https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/positive-psychology-in-the-classroom/201211/the-art-positive-psychology</a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><a href="http://www.tandfonline.com/doi/abs/10.1080/07421656.2013.757513" target="_blank">http://www.tandfonline.com/doi/abs/10.1080/07421656.2013.757513</a></span></div>
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<a href="http://www.trauma-informedpractice.com/resources/art-therapy-expressive-arts-and-positive-psychology/" target="_blank">http://www.trauma-informedpractice.com/resources/art-therapy-expressive-arts-and-positive-psychology/</a></div>
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<a href="http://positivepsychologycanada.com/Resources/Documents/Unlocking%20Creativity%20-%20Sue%20Langley.pdf" target="_blank">http://positivepsychologycanada.com/Resources/Documents/Unlocking%20Creativity%20-%20Sue%20Langley.pdf</a></div>
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<a href="http://www.tandfonline.com/doi/abs/10.1080/17533015.2016.1166142" target="_blank">http://www.tandfonline.com/doi/abs/10.1080/17533015.2016.1166142</a></div>
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10toshinehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12263916978396798526noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1842368037976453572.post-21671415610708155302016-07-21T09:38:00.000-07:002016-07-21T09:38:29.087-07:0010 transformative takeaways from ECPP 2016 (Part 1)<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<b style="text-indent: -18pt;"><span style="font-size: 7pt; font-stretch: normal; font-weight: normal;"> </span></b><b style="text-indent: -18pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">1<u>. Lisa Vivoll Straume (MIND) - Toolkit Strength Based Development Workshop</u></span></b><!--[if !supportLists]--></div>
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<b style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I learnt</b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">: i) How to map my own strength quadrant. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> ii) The
importance of individual strengths when building a team<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> ii) The
power of Table Top and Simulations to create solutions. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>I felt: </b> Elated. Inspired. Energised. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<b style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I will</b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">:</span><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> </span><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Take
care not to overuse my core strengths and to pay attention when my ‘allergy’ strengths
are activated so I pause and respond rather than react.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>Want to know more?</b> <a href="https://mind.no/en/" target="_blank">MIND</a></span><o:p></o:p></div>
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<span style="line-height: 25.2px;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Straume, L. V. & Vittersø, J. (2015). Well-being at work: Some differences between life satisfaction and personal growth as predictors of subjective health and sick-leave. Journal of Happiness Studies. 16, 149-168. doi:10.1007/s10902-014-9502-y</span></span></div>
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<span style="line-height: 25.2px;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Straume, L.V., (2015). "Leadership development in positive psychology: Practical methods for balancing the use of core values and strengths» Symposium presentation at the EAWOP Conference, Oslo: May 22</span></span></div>
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<span style="line-height: 25.2px;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Kvernmo, A. (2015). Symposium "Magic Moments. Strength-spotting in value-oriented leadership development» Symposium presentation at the EAWOP Conference, Oslo: May 22, 2015</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-stretch: normal;"> <u style="font-weight: bold;">2</u></span><span style="font-stretch: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: underline;">. </span><!--[endif]--><b><u>James Pawleski- What is positive psychology?
The importance of Theory for Research and Practice. </u><o:p></o:p></b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>I learnt:</b> i) Work is still
needed to clarify the core concepts of PP and communicate them more effectively.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> ii) I
can give you a <b>RED</b> cape which will let you stop “bad” things.
Or I can give you a <b>GREEN</b> cape which will let you grow good”
things. Which cape will you choose?<u><o:p></o:p></u></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> ii) Fractal
flourishing holds out for the well-being of individuals and groups, valuing
happiness in the short-term and in the long-term. This approach works both locally and globally. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>I felt: </b> uplifted that the <b>positive</b> in PP is still relevant. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>I will:</b> Always
pack a reversible cape.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>Want to know more?</b> <a href="https://jamespawelski.com/" target="_blank"><span style="color: black;">James Pawleski</span></a></span><o:p></o:p></div>
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<span style="color: black;"><a href="https://jamespawelski.files.wordpress.com/2016/04/defining-the-positive-part-i-jpegs.pdf" target="_blank"><span style="color: black;">https://jamespawelski.files.wordpress.com/2016/04/defining-the-positive-part-i-jpegs.pdf</span></a></span></div>
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<span style="color: black;"><a href="https://jamespawelski.files.wordpress.com/2015/12/defining-the-positive-in-positive-psychology-part-ii-1.pdf" target="_blank">https://jamespawelski.files.wordpress.com/2015/12/defining-the-positive-in-positive-psychology-part-ii-1.pdf</a></span></div>
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<b><span style="font-stretch: normal;"> <u>3.</u></span><span style="font-size: 7pt; font-stretch: normal; font-weight: normal;"><u> </u></span></b><!--[endif]--><b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><u>Bob Vallerand It's about time: The role of passion in
adaptive self process.</u><o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>I learnt: </b> i) Harmonious
passion is good for us. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> ii) Optimal
functioning is temporal.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> iii) The
highest level of well-being is achieved with a positive present state combined with
a positive/resolved past and an optimistic future.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>I felt:</b> passionate…. All-be-it with a touch of obsession.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>I will:</b> Take a positive outlook on time and combine it
with harmonious passion in order to achieve optimum psychological well-being. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>Want to know more?</b> </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><a href="https://selfdeterminationtheory.org/SDT/documents/2008_Vallerand_CanPsych.pdf" target="_blank">https://selfdeterminationtheory.org/SDT/documents/2008_Vallerand_CanPsych.pdf</a></span></span><o:p></o:p></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><a href="https://ippe.acu.edu.au/events/brown-bag-session-its-about-time-presenter-professor-robert-j-vallerand-ippe/" target="_blank">https://ippe.acu.edu.au/events/brown-bag-session-its-about-time-presenter-professor-robert-j-vallerand-ippe/</a></span></div>
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<b> <span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><u>4.</u><span style="font-stretch: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: underline;"> </span></span></b><!--[endif]--><b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><u>Barbara Frederickson Why Prioritize Positivity?
</u><o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>I learnt:</b> i) Prioritizing
positivity can trigger upward spirals of lifestyle change and the development
of harmonious passion.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> ii) Individuals
who seek positivity, with decisions about how to organize their day-to-day
lives, may be happier than those who don’t.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> ii) Studies
suggest that seeking happiness, although a balancing act, is a worthwhile
pursuit. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>I felt:</b> Absorbed and engaged…And also a little bit
awed (bit of a crush going on I think!)<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>I will: </b> Set
aside time each day for feel good activities which are as vital to my wellbeing
as exercise, nutrition and sleep.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>Want to know more?</b> <a href="http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/25401290" target="_blank">http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/25401290</a></span><o:p></o:p></div>
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<a href="https://www.researchgate.net/publication/268449790_Prioritizing_Positivity_An_Effective_Approach_to_Pursuing_Happiness" target="_blank">https://www.researchgate.net/publication/268449790_Prioritizing_Positivity_An_Effective_Approach_to_Pursuing_Happiness</a></div>
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<b> <u style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">5.<span style="font-stretch: normal; font-weight: normal;"> </span></u></b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><u><b>Mohsen Fatemi -</b><b style="text-indent: -18pt;">Positive Psychology and Psychology of
Possibility </b></u></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><u><b style="text-indent: -18pt;"><br /></b></u></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>I learnt:</b> i) Infinite
possibilities unfold themselves in emergent modes of mindfulness.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> ii) Langerian
psychology of possibility concentrates on what can be.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> iii) Only
one participant is needed to substantiate that something is possible.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>I felt: </b> Validated for wanting qualitative research, most especially
IPA, to be more prevalent in PP.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>I will: </b> Notice new
things. Live proactively in the moment. Be sensitive towards context. Celebrate
multiple perspectives.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>Want to know more? <a href="http://langermindfulnessinstitute.com/sayyed-mohsen-fatemi/" target="_blank">http://langermindfulnessinstitute.com/sayyed-mohsen-fatemi/</a></b></span><o:p></o:p></div>
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<b> <u>6. <span style="font-size: 7pt; font-stretch: normal; font-weight: normal;"> </span></u></b><!--[endif]--><b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><u>Neil Garret how the brain forms optimistic
beliefs</u><o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>I learnt:</b> i) People
incorporate good news into their existing beliefs in a normative manner but they
discount bad news leading to optimistically biased beliefs.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> ii) This
asymmetry fluctuates in response to changes in the environment in a way that
may be adaptive.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> iii) Balanced variation in this is more
likely to be observed in depression and middle age.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>I felt:</b> Not clever enough to be a doing a science
masters! <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>I will:</b> Adjust
my beliefs in response to external information with more consideration.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>Want to know more?</b> <a href="http://www.pnas.org/content/109/42/17058.full" target="_blank">http://www.pnas.org/content/109/42/17058.full</a><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<a href="http://affectivebrain.com/?page_id=257" target="_blank">http://affectivebrain.com/?page_id=257</a></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b> <u>7. </u></b></span><b style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><u>Felicia Huppert </u></b><b style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; text-indent: -18pt;"><u>What
makes people flourish? </u></b></div>
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<b style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; text-indent: -18pt;"><u><br /></u></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>I learnt:</b> i) The real
reason well-being matters is that well-being is an end in itself – an ultimate
good.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> ii) The
skills of attention, emotion regulation, and self-compassion all underpin
flourishing.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> ii) Mindfulness
is the key to unlocking these skills. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b> I felt:</b> Mindful. Kindful. And amazed at the fact
that Felicia’s dress was such a good choice as it created an impact even from the
very back of the auditorium. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>I will: </b> Continue
to be mindful.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>Want to know more?</b> <a href="http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3545194/" target="_blank">http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3545194/</a><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<a href="https://scholar.google.co.uk/citations?view_op=view_citation&hl=en&user=1KRt4NAAAAAJ&sortby=pubdate&citation_for_view=1KRt4NAAAAAJ:4MWp96NkSFoC" target="_blank">https://scholar.google.co.uk/citations?view_op=view_citation&hl=en&user=1KRt4NAAAAAJ&sortby=pubdate&citation_for_view=1KRt4NAAAAAJ:4MWp96NkSFoC</a></div>
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<b style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><u><br /></u></b></div>
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<b style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><u>8. Neil Thin - Aspirational social planning: beyond social problems
and living standards.</u></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b><u><br /></u></b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>I learnt:</b> i) Good
minds need good societies. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> ii) The
importance of social transformations required to support individual
flourishing.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> ii) A cross
–disciplinary approach is needed to find innovative ways to inform public
policy in bringing about the changes necessary for great societies. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>I felt: </b> Elated. Inspired. Energised. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>I will: </b> Take
small steps to collaborate with others to find ways to make our environments
more conducive to well-being.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>Want to know more?</b> <a href="http://www.happinessandwellbeing.org/neil-thin/" target="_blank">http://www.happinessandwellbeing.org/neil-thin/</a><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<a href="http://www.socresonline.org.uk/19/2/5.html" target="_blank">http://www.socresonline.org.uk/19/2/5.html</a></div>
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<o:p><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></o:p></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b> <u>9. </u></b><b><u>Coaching psychology and positive psychology
– perfect partners. Symposium. Stephen Palmer, Suzy Green & Ilona Boniwell</u><o:p></o:p></b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b><u><br /></u></b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>I learnt:</b> i) there is
no ‘I’ in team. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> ii) You
can take the psychology out of coaching but not the psychology out of coaching psychology.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> iii) Problem
Island can be transformed into the solution island with the right coaching questions.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> iv) Creating a positive culture fits
naturally with coaching.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> v)
Happiness bubbles exist.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>I felt: </b> In the right Room, at the right time with
the right people.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>I will:</b> Not groan (GROWn) when I use the GROW model
yet again.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> Create my own ‘dashboard’<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> Not be embarrassed about being creative with
PP; its OK to embrace my deviant thinking…being original can be an asset in
this field.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>Want to know more? </b></span><a href="http://www.isfcp.net/" target="_blank">http://www.isfcp.net/</a><b style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> </b></div>
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<b style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></b></div>
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<b style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><a href="http://www.thepositivityinstitute.com.au/" target="_blank">http://www.thepositivityinstitute.com.au/</a></b></div>
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<br /></div>
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<a href="https://www.positran.fr/" target="_blank">https://www.positran.fr/</a></div>
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<br /></div>
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<b style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><a href="http://www.happyandwell.com.au/positive-psychology-coaching-optimising-potential-2" target="_blank">http://www.happyandwell.com.au/positive-psychology-coaching-optimising-potential-2</a></b></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><a href="http://www.michellemcquaid.com/ecpp-podcasts-play/" target="_blank">http://www.michellemcquaid.com/ecpp-podcasts-play/</a></span></div>
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<b style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; text-indent: -18pt;"><span style="font-stretch: normal;">1<u>0. </u></span></b><b style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; text-indent: -18pt;"><u>Ilona Boniwell – Positive Education :making positive psychology
tangible</u></b></div>
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<b style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; text-indent: -18pt;"><u><br /></u></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>I learnt</b>: i)
THINKERING – Think + tinker : the creation and understanding of concepts in the
mind while tinkering with the hands. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> ii) ‘Hands
on thinking’ – purpose, framing, sharing, exploring, combining. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> ii) “You
can discover more about a person in an hour of play than in a year of
conversation” Plato<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b> I felt:</b> Delighted to be part of this ‘family’ of
PP. Sad that this was the end of my first experience of a PP conference. Positive
that we can make a difference by applying this science stuff with creativity,
originality and flair.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>I will:</b> Take my
new found confidence ( I wouldn’t have dreamt that I could be so brave as to
ask the closing question!) into my life.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>Want to know more?</b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><a href="https://lifelabs.psychologies.co.uk/users/579-dr-ilona-boniwell" target="_blank">https://lifelabs.psychologies.co.uk/users/579-dr-ilona-</a></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><a href="https://lifelabs.psychologies.co.uk/users/579-dr-ilona-boniwell" target="_blank">boniwell</a> <a href="http://www.zimbardo.com/downloads/2003%20(in%20press)%20Balancing%20Ones%20Time%20Pers...pdf" target="_blank">http://www.zimbardo.com/downloads/2003%20(in%20press)%20Balancing%20Ones%20Time%20Pers...pdf</a><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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10toshinehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12263916978396798526noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1842368037976453572.post-28346653316032117332016-06-20T13:16:00.000-07:002017-08-20T09:07:29.702-07:00Flourishing Fashion : An Experiential Wardrobe <div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 11pt; line-height: 200%; text-indent: 0cm;">There
is a saying in academia “all research is me-search”. I suspect this is even
truer when the researcher is a psychologist. All my life I have loved clothes.
I have worked with fashion and design in some form or other since I was
fifteen. I switched careers to become a therapist and am now completing a
positive psychology masters. It was natural to turn to dress and fashion as a
research topic.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif"; font-size: 11.0pt; line-height: 200%;">I
could chart my life’s ups and downs, the emotional highs and lows, through the
clothes that I wore. From my wedding
dresses (two) to the dress I wore for my brothers funeral, or the party frock I
have on in the photo of my fifth birthday to the jumpsuit I wore for my fiftieth,
or one of the many stripy tee-shirts I have owned in the last thirty-five
years, every garment has a story to tell. Embedded in my wardrobe is the
journal of my states of mind. Fashion functioning as a way to both express my
mood and create the way I want to feel; to communicate and enhance. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: 0cm; text-indent: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif"; font-size: 11.0pt; line-height: 200%;">For
the most part I am no longer the disturbed distressed person I was a young
adult and my wardrobe reflects this. I still love black (can black express
happiness?), but on occasion will choose colour. There is no mood that can’t be
lifted by putting on red lipstick and some type of striped top. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif"; font-size: 11.0pt; line-height: 200%;">I am
nearly always happy. And if I’m not I can reframe it in some way to provide a
positive outcome.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif"; font-size: 11.0pt; line-height: 200%;">I am
intrigued by the way other people use dress, clothes, fashion, call it what you
will, to show who they are and how they feel. I want to know if there is a
formula for wardrobe wellbeing, if I can find some way to ad(dress) depression
with a simple positive psychology
intervention based on getting dressed in the morning. Can we choose to
make ourselves happier by intentionally selecting an outfit?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: 0cm; text-indent: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif"; font-size: 11.0pt; line-height: 200%;">I
need to understand a little of why this research is so important to me in order
that I can allow for this prejudice in my interviews and analysis. Part of the
emotional response I have to clothes is the link to my mother and sisters, all
beautiful women who used fashion to their best advantage. I associate being
happy with a new dress, I link joy with the feeling of great fabric on my skin;
I connect contentment with being wrapped in a cashmere cardigan or the pleasure
of a certain pair of shoes creating the excitement of a chance encounter.
Fashion for me is psychological and all about positive emotions. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif"; font-size: 11.0pt; line-height: 200%;">I
have chosen 10 images which represent happy outfits for me. I’ll share a little
of why and what they mean, however some of the emotions are so fleeting, as if
made of gossamer, that they have been hard for me to catch. A whiff of
happiness like a lost perfume, I know that at that moment when I wore that
dress I felt great, but thinking about it in the present moment is often tinged
with sadness; I am unable to recreate the feeling even if I put that dress on,
it needs the context. There are other garments that haven’t lost the power to
make me smile years down the line, what might it be about them that they can
still make me smile? If I could </span><span style="font-family: "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 11pt; line-height: 200%; text-indent: 0cm;">work
that out would I have a recipe for flourishing fashion?</span></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgZu9JSu11LTDqtMj-v2YlP1nj2mvyKvJFIcx7bbAJr_Re-e-HbAQz7Zqdhemzsr_Vso4O-j8vG9i0sE5dKv2kaExsmpTc7J3Ca6ysehzvN00ZoOBOAG8Yn2eum-J5KqY7-mQJVXPXGuRQ/s1600/flourishing+fashion.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="363" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgZu9JSu11LTDqtMj-v2YlP1nj2mvyKvJFIcx7bbAJr_Re-e-HbAQz7Zqdhemzsr_Vso4O-j8vG9i0sE5dKv2kaExsmpTc7J3Ca6ysehzvN00ZoOBOAG8Yn2eum-J5KqY7-mQJVXPXGuRQ/s640/flourishing+fashion.jpg" width="640" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif"; font-size: 11.0pt; line-height: 200%;">1)Luella
shoes – even if I just put these shoes on with jeans I would jump for joy; well
not exactly jump because they are high but they make me so very happy. I wore
them for my second wedding but they were love-worn long before then. They made me
feel successful, in control of my own destiny and very special. I have loads of
shoes which make me feel truly great but this pair is the best ever. Thinking about
them makes me want to go and get them right now and wear them whilst I am
writing. These shoes represent freedom, fun, and beifabulous forty something recreating
the life I wanted just for me on the Kings Road; Chelsea Girl shoes.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: 0cm; text-indent: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif"; font-size: 11.0pt; line-height: 200%;">2)
Red Pyjamas – this were very soft winceyette and clashed with my hair, they
were just pretty enough, not too little girly. I loved getting home and putting
them on. My flatmate had almost matching ones, we often looked like bookends on
the sofa. I still love the comfort of a great pair of PJ’s, they make me feel
loved and as if I am being cuddled. This particular pair, this photo, reminds
me of a great time living in LA. I wish I still had those red pyjamas.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 11pt; line-height: 200%; text-indent: 0cm;">3) Ghost-silver grey ‘wedding’ dress. Of course
the dress you wear to get married in will always be special but this dress is
more than that; it falls in such a sensuous way, it caresses your body so you feel
really sexy. The cut is soft and flowing. It makes me feel a bit Hollywood,
like a screen goddess and that’s a nice feeling. You can see how happy this
dress made me on my wedding day and it hangs in a special spot so whenever I pass
it I want to stroke it. It makes me very happy just knowing a dress as good as
this exists.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 11pt; line-height: 200%; text-indent: 0cm;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: 0cm; text-indent: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 14.6667px; line-height: 29.3333px;">4) Leather Jacket – this isn’t about the chips it’s all about my trusty black leather jacket. I could wear it with anything and it makes for a happy outfit. This one is a luxury but any I have owned have had the same effect; instant feel-good. I love black and white one of my best combinations… a sort of striped t-shirt effect but without the shirt or the stripes. If I needed to make myself feel strong and secure and very me I would wear my leather jacket and nothing else would matter.</span><span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif"; font-size: 11.0pt; line-height: 200%;"> </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif"; font-size: 11.0pt; line-height: 200%;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 11pt; line-height: 29.3333px;">5) A Stripped T-shirt. If I had to have a desert island happy making wardrobe I would</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 11pt; line-height: 29.3333px;">fill it with stripy tees so had to add another one. My black jeans also make me happy and<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 11pt; line-height: 29.3333px;">you can just make them out in this photo.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 11pt; line-height: 200%; text-indent: 0cm;">6) Another Striped
Tee-shirt – this one happens to be black and white but could just as easily be
navy and white, any of the many I own have
the same instant positive effect. They make me feel on top of the world…tickety-boo…putting
on a stripy tee is my version of Prozac. I could wear one every day and the
world would be OK. I don’t really know why I have any other items in my
wardrobe. Stripey tees are my ultimate happy garment. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 11pt; line-height: 200%; text-indent: 0cm;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 14.6667px; line-height: 29.3333px;">7) Paris T-shirt and check skirt – I have removed the leather jacket but it’s all part of the wellbeing-ness in this group of clothes. A tee–shirt that I go to when I don’t want to wear stripes but want the same feeling. For some reason I Feel like Simone de Beauvoir in this outfit and that’s a good thing. I like feeling clever. I also feel swishy in this skirt, its soft and comfortable and young (I’m sensing a theme). It has a feeling a bit like a school uniform. I look happy here.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 14.6667px; line-height: 29.3333px;">8) Kenzo summer dress –I don’t look obviously happy in this photo but this is a genuine happy frock. It’s sunny and bright and jolly. I always take it on holiday because it is fun and a bit silly and that is how it makes me feel. It’s very young. I want to be just a bit outrageous in such an ebullient dress. It really is too short at my age but I just don’t care…if I could turn cartwheels I would do it in this dress and flash my knickers, that’s how good this makes me feel.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 14.6667px; line-height: 29.3333px;">9) white shorts, printed top, gold sandals – my standard beach outfit, always have some variation of this going on when I’m on holiday. White shorts make me feel that summer will go on for ever. This little top is so old but I love it; the print spells LOVE and that’s how I it makes me feel; young, sexy, relaxed and in love. The gold sandals are also ancient but make me feel beachy; I love pretty feet.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif"; font-size: 11.0pt; line-height: 200%;">10) Black
jump-suit – hmm black and white again, with giant pearls and red shoes. Jumpsuits
sound childish, there is something not very mature about them so perhaps that’s
why wearing this one at my fiftieth birthday made me happy. If I wear it with a
t-shirt and leather jacket it makes me just as happy. It’s a bit like a pair of
pyjamas in the comfort league but with glamour. I do love these shoes if I teamed
them with the red PJ’s and leather jacket that would be a very happy outfit.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 11pt; line-height: 200%; text-indent: 0cm;">I am
conducting an experiment on myself and for the next 7 days I will be dressing
each</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif"; font-size: 11.0pt; line-height: 200%;">day with the sole intention of being happy, no outfit
will be allowed if it doesn’t bring a smile <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif"; font-size: 11.0pt; line-height: 200%;">to my lips when I look in the mirror. Expect to see
plenty of stripy tee-shirts! If anyone is <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif"; font-size: 11.0pt; line-height: 200%;">intrigued I will put the outfits on my instagram page,
@wearingwellbeing, with a comment on <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif"; font-size: 11.0pt; line-height: 200%;">my emotional response. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif"; font-size: 11.0pt; line-height: 200%;">Happy dressing xx<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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10toshinehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12263916978396798526noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1842368037976453572.post-86150288068834291012016-01-27T12:51:00.002-08:002016-01-27T13:00:03.956-08:00100 Happiness Credits in the Positivity Bank<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhCe4PrRo43bMY6L367cYQ7cagsXu87TaeJ1gsOnrB0kCjEEOpcJGlEK2l8U5u16fWfKPTvzuDU-Do0qxGrEuxakC9UP3kGNKvX35-R62VDCk1aVcAvn9LFCCaIlvJv1k6ILOLdaKUpyvQ/s1600/daily+10.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="212" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhCe4PrRo43bMY6L367cYQ7cagsXu87TaeJ1gsOnrB0kCjEEOpcJGlEK2l8U5u16fWfKPTvzuDU-Do0qxGrEuxakC9UP3kGNKvX35-R62VDCk1aVcAvn9LFCCaIlvJv1k6ILOLdaKUpyvQ/s640/daily+10.jpg" width="640" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">10 things I've learnt from #10toshinedaily10</span></h3>
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<li><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Spending time on a creative project every day makes me focused on my own unique ways of experiencing happiness. </span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">I love having a very simple daily goal that feels just the right balance of achievable and challenging.</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Thinking about what is good in my life right now, and in the past, makes me extremely grateful that I am so lucky.</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Experimenting with different ways to show my DAILY10 is increasing my knowledge and skills.</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Looking out for each days theme makes me pay attention and become more mindful of my day. </span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">I feel very privileged to have so much in my life to enjoy.And I've got 100 images if I need reminding.</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">I genuinely believe that social media can be used to add to wellbeing; reviewing my #10TOSHINEDAILY10 photos gives me a feelgood glow.</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">I can't 'make' others join in! But I love it when they do.It's fantastic to see other people's happiness.</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">When I do inspire anyone to take a baby step to acting in a way to increase their happiness I dance around the kitchen in joyful abandon.</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>WE</b> (Weef & I) have enjoyed this so much that we are going to continue to collect our daily 10 taking it in turns to put an image up on <a href="http://10toshine.co.uk/" target="_blank">10TOSHINEDAILY10</a> The intention is that this will become a space where we can create a dialogue around our ideas on the art of positive living, a kind of free-association of images in response to our day-to-day happiness levels.<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj3TQhyphenhyphenXCDXfrqBpH6mdDUaTlBQpjU_WIiCnNniNFZF4Z76FFIX0XmDFocn9bv0gpLMmpW7hiddUmOsuEArtdcAiwyJrTVu3Up4P0E6F1ho1DqhwBxLIVdOUTi9yGd8iB-i3-HRq8_C83A/s1600/words.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj3TQhyphenhyphenXCDXfrqBpH6mdDUaTlBQpjU_WIiCnNniNFZF4Z76FFIX0XmDFocn9bv0gpLMmpW7hiddUmOsuEArtdcAiwyJrTVu3Up4P0E6F1ho1DqhwBxLIVdOUTi9yGd8iB-i3-HRq8_C83A/s640/words.jpg" width="640" /></a></div>
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10toshinehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12263916978396798526noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1842368037976453572.post-56718461794330068002016-01-17T10:08:00.001-08:002016-01-17T10:08:27.902-08:00 10 to SHINE 10 Day Challenge <div style="text-align: justify;">
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjH4JjTBbaTQdMt2J11HwzAg-ha79osmdizq5cesKLVVpGy0pQoe5mHaSdVKo8-0V2-_EGu9NamblSH7v9L075Oep2h5SzcV2765tg2uRO8bHhd7y71EtifvcW5jMdkB1F4BBO6BCfG2vY/s1600/hashtag+pic.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjH4JjTBbaTQdMt2J11HwzAg-ha79osmdizq5cesKLVVpGy0pQoe5mHaSdVKo8-0V2-_EGu9NamblSH7v9L075Oep2h5SzcV2765tg2uRO8bHhd7y71EtifvcW5jMdkB1F4BBO6BCfG2vY/s640/hashtag+pic.jpg" width="640" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The middle of January can sometimes feel a bit of a let down, Christmas excitement has faded away.....the spring seems along way off. With that in mind I have decided it's the perfect time for a happiness making challenge. Simply 10 days of 10 reasons to be cheerful.</span></div>
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<b>10 reasons to do the 10toshine 10 day challenge</b></div>
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1. Research suggests that focus our minds on the good things in our life increases our well- being.</div>
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2. The challenge will encourage you to be mindful of what makes you feel happy</div>
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3. Anything that is done with consistency for 10 days forms new neural pathways and become a habit (actually I made up the 10 day bit of this but it might!!!)</div>
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4. You will acquire insight into what makes you positive and how to add more of it to every day.</div>
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5. It may encourage others to share their ideas of happiness.</div>
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6. You will increase your creativity as you come up with innovative ways to respond to the challenge.</div>
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7. It will encourage you to spend 10 minutes every day on yourself.</div>
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8. Your brain is built to learn new things and loves a challenge.</div>
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9. Feeling good for 10 minutes will release oxytocin and make you feel even better than good.</div>
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10. It’s a simple way to be happy, that’s free, can be shared, can be done anywhere with whatever you have to hand. Alone or with friends. </div>
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AND at the end of the 10 day challenge you will have 100 different ways that your life is AMAZING, that you are FABULOUS, that what you do every day is ASTONISHING, that life is WONDERFUL. That this is a ZIP-A-DE-DO-DAH place to be, at this time, in this place, right now. </div>
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We will all have days when life doesn’t go according to plan, dark cloudy moments when it’s tough to remember the sun will shine again. If you have a whole 100 reasons in your resilience bank that you can dip into, it will help you to maintain a sense that this too will pass. </div>
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<b>Bonus Reason to do the 10toshine 10 day challenge</b></div>
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If you do participate you will also get the added bonus of making me really happy and endlessly gratefully. I may thank you in the form of cake, dance, or thank you posts on your favourite social media platform. </div>
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<b>So how do you do the 10toSHINE 10 Day Challenge?</b></div>
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It’s very simple starting on Monday 18th January I’m asking you to find 10 things each day that make you happy and to post them on any social media platform with the hashtag #10toshineDaily10</div>
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You could put them up 10 times in the day, or post once each day. You can write lists or draw a cartoon. You could take 10 photos during the course of the day or a collage of 10 images. You could record 10 words that make you smile, or bake 10 cupcakes iced with reasons to be cheerful.</div>
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Nothing should take more than 10 minutes to do, although if you want to take longer you can of course – it’s just that you may then find you use the excuse of not having enough time!</div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgSmd3RK8iJQbPZLaZ0XswOkgPHooKmWSLeqWrm0jhB8kdT12qK_W3mZ7d-tEwdCz3hD-Uvdn2X2xwtA0IL9ce__0kICtFt7k_hzDAYp3G0ldJi4NhF1NRPGRwCIra_OlhcBxRn3bH0AEE/s1600/10aday.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgSmd3RK8iJQbPZLaZ0XswOkgPHooKmWSLeqWrm0jhB8kdT12qK_W3mZ7d-tEwdCz3hD-Uvdn2X2xwtA0IL9ce__0kICtFt7k_hzDAYp3G0ldJi4NhF1NRPGRwCIra_OlhcBxRn3bH0AEE/s400/10aday.png" width="400" /></a></div>
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There are no right ways to do this but because I know that sometimes it is easier if you can see alternative ways to approach a task I'm going to offer 10 suggestions:</div>
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1. A list of 10 people you love:</div>
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I found this hard because I wanted to start to sort out the different ways and kinds of love I have for people…..I love lots and lots of my family and friends, I love people who would probably only consider themselves an acquaintance and would be embarrassed if I said I loved them! So I just put down the first 10 names that I thought of when I was the word LOVE.</div>
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2. 10 photos of things you own that make you happy:</div>
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I choose my 10 favourite coloured pens because I love drawing and certain colours make me smile.</div>
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3. A mind map of the 10 things that you appreciate most about yourself:</div>
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Celebrate all your good bits</div>
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4. Choose 10 things you see every day which you are grateful to have in your life:</div>
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5. A collage of the 10 images on your phone that make you grin from ear to ear:</div>
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All those silly moments you collect but haven’t necessarily shared because you may not be looking your best!</div>
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6. The 10 songs that make you smile whenever you think of them.</div>
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I’d love to have the skills to edit my selection together in a kind of happy compilation and upload them but that is beyond me.</div>
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7. Find a way to represent 10 positive emotions:</div>
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8. Take 1 photo on the hour for 10 hours: </div>
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I’m going to do this for my first challenge on Monday. Whatever I’m doing between 8am and 5pm I shall stop and find the thing in my view which makes me feel good.</div>
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9. Make a collection of 10 jokes:</div>
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Weef’s suggestion this one, I would struggle to write up 10 jokes but look out for his!</div>
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10. Photograph your 10 favourite tee-shirts: </div>
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I have 10 favourite strippy tees and they make me very happy especially if I get dressed before Weef as the rule in our house is whoever wears the stripes is the winner for the day. We take great pleasure in our childlike rituals.</div>
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Please have a go at joining me in the 10toshine 10 day challenge, it’s a bit silly,very light hearted and a good way to get to the end of the month. We often set ourselves goals which deprive us of things, this challenge is about adding more to our life, increasing the things which give us pleasure not denying ourselves. </div>
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I would love to be able to collect all the images and lists that have been hash-tagged and collate a front page for the new project I’m working on so please do share and let’s see how high we can raise our happiness for the next 10 days.</div>
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Be shiny happy people and show me the results. xxx</div>
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10toshinehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12263916978396798526noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1842368037976453572.post-90075277257782095242015-12-22T01:50:00.003-08:002015-12-22T01:50:32.047-08:00Looking forward to looking back – Acknowledging a good year<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">When we are little we are encouraged to write a letter to Father
Christmas explaining the reasons we ‘deserve’ presents; if we are lucky this
may have encouraged us to reflect on what we have achieved in the previous twelve
months that made us ‘good’. We may
continue this when we write notes in our Christmas cards telling friends our
news. Looking back at the end of the year seems natural to us.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">When we acknowledge our achievements we relive the good
stuff and our brains reward us further with releasing the feel good hormones that
were activated at the time of the original event. It can also be useful to note
what felt good last year so that we can have more of it next year. Goal setting
in January can be more fun when it is focused on positive aspects rather than
denying ourselves and giving things up!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">So take a little bit of me time this week to think about
all the good things you did this past year; those successes that you feel good
about. The little daily triumphs in life that help uplift us. The big actions
that lead us to new ways of being. It may
work for you to just close your eyes and let the memories come or perhaps your
Facebook page is the diary of your good stuff, I find that instagram is a
collection of all my happy moments,and working out how to use instagram is on my achievement list this year, along with hashtags,daily tweeting and feeling good about writing a blog! When you have spent time thinking and
feeling your victories it’s helpful to find a way to make them tangible.
Writing, drawing, creating in some way a tribute to yourself, your personal ‘wow,
look at what I have accomplished …… I am amazing’ (and if it makes you feel
better write it to Father Christmas!)<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Of course there will be sadness for many of us about losses
and disappointments from the past year but we can still acknowledge how we
responded to those events. It doesn't detract from the importance someone meant
to us or the significance sorrow; if we are able to take pride in having been
aware of our pain but are still able to smile when the sun comes up we are
displaying healthy self-awareness. When we have survived a year of turmoil we
should appreciate our own resilience with extra gratitude.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">It maybe that you want to look at making a gratitude map
when you have finished basking in your achievements for the year, or plotting your
positivity path through 2015. Whatever cements all the ‘good stuff’ you have created,
the ways you have flourished and the well-being you have promoted in your own
life and others.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I like to take a big sheet of paper and let the words flow
then add colour and doodles and patterns. This is for no one’s eyes but mine so
I don’t need to worry about making sense or spelling correctly. This year I shall
take a photo and make it my January screen saver; a reminder of what a
fantastic 2015 I made for myself. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">And don’t forget when you have basked in your own clever
goodness to give yourself a big vote of thanks......it wouldn't hurt to face yourself in the mirror, smile and say out loud "well done, you made it, you are truly fabulous!" </span><o:p></o:p></div>
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10toshinehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12263916978396798526noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1842368037976453572.post-27805310897296455372015-12-14T11:55:00.001-08:002015-12-14T12:18:26.130-08:0010 Gifts I’d like to give you this Christmas<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">1. A Self- Acceptance Stick – You are absolutely OK; and when you’re not OK then that’s fine too….. Every day you are doing your best and no one can ask for more than that. A handy alternative to a magic mirror.<br /><br />2. Compassion Confetti – gather up big handfuls and chuck it about when love is in short supply; love for yourself as well as others. <br /><br />Tip - applying hairspray before application helps it stick. <br /><br />3. A Kindness Candle – lasts for hours, fragrance wafts far and wide, long lasting and self- fulfilling.<br /><br />4. Positivity Pastilles – suck whenever doubts cloud your appetite. Can be administered freely without any side effects.<br /><br />5. A Bottle of Meaningfulness – especially useful on dark January mornings when purpose may be in short supply.<br /><br />6. Flourishing Essence – dab on pulse points to release flow. Also activates serotonin and with continued use can reset endorphin supplies. <br /><br />7. Relationship Sprinkles – powerful and instantly transformative. Sheds light on misunderstanding and fosters empathy.<br /><br />8. Achievement Medals – big and small accomplishments need to be recognised; try standing tall and shouting ‘YES’ when pinning a rosette to your lapel which will proclaim your greatness to all and sundry.<br /><br />9. Endless Engagement – often an after effect of 5; but can be used as a stand-alone product in conjunction with a sense of purpose.<br /><br />10. A Roll of Renewable Gratitude – the thank you tape that keeps on giving…… </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif;">With lots of love </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif;">Rebecca @10toshine</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span>10toshinehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12263916978396798526noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1842368037976453572.post-45354982846726237502015-12-01T13:21:00.000-08:002015-12-01T13:21:01.247-08:00Five Days of Five Minute Mindfulness.<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Mindfulness can seem complicated but it is simply paying attention. In the build up to Christmas</span><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> we can become extra stressed and taking the time to increase awareness of the wonders of the world around us is a great way to maintain a calm approach to the festivities. As with any new healthy habit it's a good idea to start with small steps and build up as you become more confident. Above all mindfulness should be practised without stress or judgement</span><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">, an attitude of </span><i style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">lets see</i><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> and compassion for yourself is helpful.There is no right or wrong. A little everyday is a good way to begin.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>DAY 1 – Stop and
listen</b>. Spend just a few minutes and focus your mind on sounds. What can you
hear? Close sounds near to you? The rustle of someone in the next seat? Far
away distant sounds? A radio in the
neighbour’s kitchen? Your own body
sounds? Can you hear your own breathing? Try focus on each level of sound in
turn; can you shut out all but your own internal noises? Can you tune your hearing
out really far; stretch it, find tiny sounds just registering from far away.
Play with what you can hear. It’s easier if you close your eyes and turn down
other activity whilst you concentrate on one specific sense. And that’s it…..that’s
mindfulness.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>DAY 2 – Take a break.
</b>Sit down somewhere calm and quiet with your favourite hot drink, tea,
coffee, milk, whatever makes you feel soothed and relaxed. Look closely at the
cup, the shape, the colour, the spaces around the cup shape. Watch the liquid
in the cup; perhaps you can notice a tiny movement across the surface. Take in
with your eyes everything you notice about this drink in this cup at this
moment. Pick the cup up and feel its weight in your hands. Notice how the
warmth from the drink changes the temperature of your own skin, you may even be
able to sense the warmth as it travels up from your fingers through to the palm
of your hand and spreads out as it extends further up your forearms. Pick the
cup up higher so you can smell the contents, take a big deep breathe in and feel
the smell of warm comfort as it floats into your mind. Finally take a sip, notice
the sensation of the cup against your lip, the feeling as the drink touches your
teeth then your tongue until it changes the way your whole mouth feels. Savour the
taste; does the first sip taste different when it hits various parts of your mouth?
Can you feel the hot liquid travelling down as you finally swallow it? That’s mindfulness
in the moment.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>DAY 3 – Bodily
Awareness. </b>Find somewhere very comfortable to lie or sit. Close your eyes. Focus
on the feeling of your feet where they touch another surface; is it hard? Rough?
Soft? What about the pressure? How about any socks or shoes as they touch the
skin on your feet? How does that feel? Travelling up from your legs take notice
of each body part in turn; really focus on one bit at a time. Be aware of the
physical sensations of clothing as it makes contact with your skin and how each
body part experiences touching the surface it is resting on. When you have
experienced your body as separate parts take time to pull out from the sense of
individual limbs and feel your whole body operating as one unit. This is mindfulness and can be very refreshing!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>DAY 4 – In the now.</b>
The main ingredient in the mindful recipe is the present moment. When you consciously
stop and focus on one sensation, one option from all the possible things you could
be sensing, your mind has no choice but to be fully present in the now. We all
have a tendency to add judgements to what we are thinking, mindfulness offers
the chance to take a break from that habitual way of thinking and just be. When
you are going about your life today take some time to focus on one thing at a
time. If you are talking to someone try not to look around or wander what you are
going to do next, give the dialogue your full and undivided attention. If you are
doing the washing up really be aware of the way it feels to do so. Just taking
a few minutes at a time to be fully present with whatever it is you are engaged
in doing and do so without attaching meaning to it. Accept whatever comes up in
such moments with an open mind. Being mindful encourages freedom to explore our
habits</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>DAY 5 –360° Sensory
Space.</b> Find a place today that is completely new to you. It may involve a
bit of forward planning but it needs to be a space you have never experienced before.
Perhaps a street you have never walked down, a gallery you have never visited,
a tree you have never stopped at and pondered. It doesn't need to be anywhere
grand or complicated but it does need to be new to you. In this novel space I want
you to practice using all your senses to trace your sensory surroundings. Just one
minute per sense to discover how this place looks, smells, sounds, tastes (if
appropriate), and feels to your touch. Really absorb all the perceptions that you
experience in a brief five minutes. Open up all your senses to the world around
you in this fleeting moment. Take in all the abundance of sensations. Then just
continue to be very quiet and turn your attention inside. Turn off the external
stimulus and observe how you feel. Allow it to be whatever it is. (This can be
quite a powerful experience so just accept however you feel and approach it
with a sense of what if?) Give yourself some time to re-locate in the space
before moving on. This is the five point sense meditation and a great way to
ground yourself whenever you need some mindful space. It can be done anywhere, any time, but it’s a good idea to practice it for the first time in new surroundings
so as not to be influenced by previous experience. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Just five minutes of daily mindfulness can benefit so many
areas of our life; we can restore a healthy friendly relationship to ourselves,
reconnect with our internal positive resources, and release abundant creativity.
Mindfulness is the true path to the heart; of being the most authentic version
of you in the present moment. And there is a unique freedom in being just that.
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10toshinehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12263916978396798526noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1842368037976453572.post-7509118941881176582015-11-26T08:09:00.001-08:002015-11-26T08:09:20.100-08:0024 ways to Create Christmas Happiness<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjlwfTqZwPUrm8Mu3u8do_oo_7hNW3iwwMNzdy18mNVf95hed_0Lj3aBSl4foewjx4h2Z9q0n2VZk63Dg6jT7KVUYz8sqInsJ-rZlh8Mm6tvPxea3UxqAm5Hu3CDCqISBs9Z3A4SFOdN6k/s1600/Photo_2015-11-26_04-01-06_PM.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjlwfTqZwPUrm8Mu3u8do_oo_7hNW3iwwMNzdy18mNVf95hed_0Lj3aBSl4foewjx4h2Z9q0n2VZk63Dg6jT7KVUYz8sqInsJ-rZlh8Mm6tvPxea3UxqAm5Hu3CDCqISBs9Z3A4SFOdN6k/s400/Photo_2015-11-26_04-01-06_PM.png" width="400" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br />With a month to go until Christmas I've been thinking about ways to be even happier this holiday season. I love Christmas. But I know a fair few people who get very stressed about the whole thing. Applying the same ideas of mindfulness, kindfulness and thankfulness to the pre-Christmas rush will help to cultivate calm well-being and ensure a stress free time everyone to enjoy. <br /><br />Happy Christmas thoughts in no particular order:<br /><br />1.<b> Happy thoughts bring happy things</b> – why waste thoughts, time, and energy on worrying about whether something may not be perfect.<br /><br />2. <b>Care and share</b> – relationships are what it is all about.<br /><br />3. <b>Look for the best in everyone </b>– we all have good in our hearts.<br /><br />4. <b>Make magic moments</b> – it’s up to each and everyone of us to create the world we want to live in.<br /><br />5. <b>Be your own person</b> – your unique so be as different, as individual, as YOU as you can be.<br /><br />6. <b>Love</b> – always, in as many ways as you can. ( see 17)<br /><br />7. <b>Simply be happy</b> – don’t make things unnecessarily complicated. A sunny day is a reason to celebrate.<br /><br />8. <b>Appreciate the good stuff </b>– notice , become aware of the world around you; it’s all pretty amazing<br /><br />9. <b>Kindness is free</b> – a simple gesture of friendship, an offer to help, a nod and a wave; there is no cost to consideration. ( see 17)<br /><br />10.<b> Look around with wonder</b> – really take the time to look at the everyday things that you may have seen a hundred times but not necessarily have savoured before.<br /><br />11. <b>Shine your own light</b> – be the best you possible and don’t hide your talents.<br /><br />12. <b>Trust your heart</b> – we all know what is good for us, our body gives us signals all the time. Our heart will always tell us if we are on the right path.<br /><br />13. <b>Smile</b> – it realises fizzy hormones that make the world light up. (see 17)<br /><br />14. <b>Sprinkle everyday with silliness</b> – sometimes we need to go back to the lightness of being a child and add a bit of sparkle.<br /><br />15. <b>Believe In wonderful</b> – it exists for us all.<br /><br />16. <b>Joy full </b>– start every day with the thought that you will fill it with all the things that make life good; the people that you love, the sights that give you pleasure, the tastes that make you come alive, the sounds that inspire you to sing out with joy.<br /><br />17.<b> Give (unconditional love)</b> – give a smile, a hug, a kind word, a seat on the tube, a hand with the shopping. Give lots of love, sprinkle your whole day with it, just because you can and have so much to give.<br /><br />18. <b>Plant happy seeds</b> – some seeds take longer to germinate than others, be patient they will flower when the time is right.<br /><br />19. <b>Laugh</b> – get those endorphins flowing. (see 14 which should get the laughter going if it needs reigniting)<br /><br />20. <b>Choose to be happy</b> – it’s your choice how you perceive things. You can choose to look for happiness, to see the good in life, to find HAPPY in all kinds of places.<br /><br />21. <b>Kiss</b> – not just for lovers but for friends, children, pets, blow a kiss to the postman… kiss to let them know you care.<br /><br />22.<b> Hug</b> – See 21<br /><br />23. <b>Gratitude opens doors</b> – when we show our appreciation, when we are brimming with thankfulness the world responds with kindness<br /><br />24. <b>Thank you</b> – so easy to say, so special to show, so lovely to receive.<br /><br />As a reminder to keep positive why not download a 10toSHINE colour-your-own calendar with 24 ways to <b>Create Christmas Happiness</b>. </span><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjsac1Wa8LZ1LzLPfcO5iEjhHbVYarD6rn_VcmMggF3fUpP_kNPw4EAUclh-959If1KGHLoKuP6gH0Ca-fEtm3cN1cBnxvzXvkdp3TdJGzTtDW7tE4Bbzk2I6iwAX3pjGCGiPLYSO6XmI8/s1600/20151125_165834-COLLAGE.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjsac1Wa8LZ1LzLPfcO5iEjhHbVYarD6rn_VcmMggF3fUpP_kNPw4EAUclh-959If1KGHLoKuP6gH0Ca-fEtm3cN1cBnxvzXvkdp3TdJGzTtDW7tE4Bbzk2I6iwAX3pjGCGiPLYSO6XmI8/s400/20151125_165834-COLLAGE.jpg" width="400" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><a href="https://drive.google.com/file/d/0B_z4rTg7Ahzrc2xPaW5KeFJQajg0RHBHdlhiaHc5VDNmXy1J/view?usp=sharing" target="_blank">Front sheet - numbers</a> </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><a href="https://drive.google.com/file/d/0B_z4rTg7AhzrQ3FNSTNJdEk1amJ0OU5Dck41bzdLYlNzb2lJ/view?usp=sharing" target="_blank">Sheet two - words</a><br /><br />I’m a big fan of mindful colouring in, so if the idea of the holiday season is already making you tense get out your pencil case, print off the 2 A4 sheets and absorb yourself in a bit of playful relaxation.<br /><br />Step 1: Colour the top sheet, the one with the numbers.<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<br />Step 2: Carefully cut around the heavy marked lines that make the windows. Only three sides per window, not the dotted line.<br /><br />Step 3: On the second sheet apply glue to the areas around the boxes.<br /><br />Step 4: place top sheet on to sheet two and smooth down so firmly glued together.<br /><br />Each day as you open a window you will find a positive prompt to guide your day. I'm going to colour-in my ‘affirmations’ as they appear each day, just to reinforce them a little more, but there are no rules so do as you wish.<br /><br />And of course you could get even more creative:<br /><br />You could print off the sheets, cut out the sayings and the numbers then stick them to card back to back, to create a 24 pack of handy happiness hints.<br /><br />Or make them into tags and tie them to a happiness branch for a blossoming of positive inspiration.<br /><br />Or make two sets and turn them into a game of happy snap.<br /><br />Play. Have fun. Share with friends. Get out the glitter…… that’s what Christmas should be about. <br /><br />I’d love to know your suggestions and to see the myriad of ways you have chosen to <b>Create Christmas Happiness</b>. Please share them with me.<br /><br />Thank you R x </span>
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10toshinehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12263916978396798526noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1842368037976453572.post-6125652812813749412015-11-05T02:11:00.001-08:002015-11-05T02:11:25.035-08:00Make Yourself Happy<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgMyP5JJLvWHvNc45skZASjR84at3nN95TdUIzjT-LGv1wZ2t6jC7ReJhY6AgfMmgwEFXO_TpcIRsqcdypk2OOHX1LKOPBo8M43j5imqHYKMTzP0-td9bgVbweapfTYp_u06hlXPmNKuCY/s1600/20151104_210951-COLLAGE.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgMyP5JJLvWHvNc45skZASjR84at3nN95TdUIzjT-LGv1wZ2t6jC7ReJhY6AgfMmgwEFXO_TpcIRsqcdypk2OOHX1LKOPBo8M43j5imqHYKMTzP0-td9bgVbweapfTYp_u06hlXPmNKuCY/s400/20151104_210951-COLLAGE.jpg" width="400" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">When I was very little I loved </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">colouring books.But I didn't love rules; I have at least one clear memory of being told my 'creative' technique wasn't 'right'. One infant teacher held my picture up to the whole class as an example of 'wrong' coloured sky (I had made it pink).</span><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">But this didn't stop me.I drew things my own way and created my world with all the colours I wanted.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I understood at five years old that a new packet of felt tips and a blank sheet provided all I needed to be happy,so </span><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I totally get why adult colouring is so popular. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">This is why you should give it a go:</span></div>
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<li><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">it's a calming and soothing - we all know mindfulness works, colouring-in creates that feeling without having to try.</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">You can purchase felt tips and a pencil case! </span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">There are no rules; no one will tell you the sky isn't pink !</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">When we access our creativity it produces changes in our brain that makes our thinking clearer and we become more productive.</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">If we combine colouring with affirmations we are using the relaxed focus to seed the ideas in our minds.</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">We can do it when other people are watching TV and disappear into our own world without going into a different room.</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">its joyful to see the colours on the page.</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">When you have completed a colouring-in it leaves a lovely warm glow of satisfaction.</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">If you add a bit of folding, cutting or even sticking you can carry your inspirations around in your bag, or put it on the bed side table, anywhere you will catch a glimpse of your work and remember....</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Remember how creative, clever, brilliant, fabulous, wonderful and absolutely as happy as you can be in a world of your own making. </span></li>
</ol>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">If you would like to colour your own little book of happiness its simple and free. Click here:</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><a href="https://drive.google.com/file/d/0B_z4rTg7AhzrQ19kTE1UX3FiRXM/view?usp=sharing" target="_blank">Little of Happy Colouring</a></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>Simple steps to Make Yourself Happy</b></span></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgrYUSj8NrT_3Y2okn8MMtBlwkobunRA9CkLYnK5p4wKO0Ii4Wy0CgjMddEZhp_scs9GBSyh1YSuXGLqXE5V5r_UVVjvuBVeRIjWOXI4ZX-lRjveibLKdYYuCYr9ZXfPBOmvgB0ZGd-2uI/s1600/col+1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="179" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgrYUSj8NrT_3Y2okn8MMtBlwkobunRA9CkLYnK5p4wKO0Ii4Wy0CgjMddEZhp_scs9GBSyh1YSuXGLqXE5V5r_UVVjvuBVeRIjWOXI4ZX-lRjveibLKdYYuCYr9ZXfPBOmvgB0ZGd-2uI/s320/col+1.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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<li><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">click link. print sheet. </span></li>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">(If your printer allows set to borderless)</span><br /><br style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;" /><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /></span><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span><div>
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiOG7MK_t30jzoHb5pXBkMAWacGS35l39ej7rKboCA_L3lShOuldR1qW2FTRNqHBNUjZVOXm9Dp06sdtWGIgYLJ9rqRFmPDthO1MwvMqiMEEmkVaP7zw1kPyMSGtFDYpK4e5FBMTguD5k4/s1600/col+2.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="180" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiOG7MK_t30jzoHb5pXBkMAWacGS35l39ej7rKboCA_L3lShOuldR1qW2FTRNqHBNUjZVOXm9Dp06sdtWGIgYLJ9rqRFmPDthO1MwvMqiMEEmkVaP7zw1kPyMSGtFDYpK4e5FBMTguD5k4/s320/col+2.jpg" width="320" /></a><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
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<li><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">relax, have fun, get colouring.</span></li>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgSX6USE-dZ3Kl0Z8hPS4PgTrdAIhrBfa9yPdJVwRUgihUaGgxC5Phqwy8yT7K5Re6HAdYT29g-4OwEqpV-v4rlje9VOZUcMmc6-2Dh4YBbiR23P_gLTOB1iwqy_jqopbpfCSVaV5rLVPM/s1600/col+3.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="225" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgSX6USE-dZ3Kl0Z8hPS4PgTrdAIhrBfa9yPdJVwRUgihUaGgxC5Phqwy8yT7K5Re6HAdYT29g-4OwEqpV-v4rlje9VOZUcMmc6-2Dh4YBbiR23P_gLTOB1iwqy_jqopbpfCSVaV5rLVPM/s400/col+3.jpg" width="400" /></a></div>
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<ul><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhmVt_tg7R8ZVlBTdOFAzt7nVs6teEj_tHXj_ud0u2f89JSX3RjArAlZypwIz-2wVCbSZQUP_GThAtDGZquAlDGyCvWrmq7_NTj9aTdu3dVGBfy2Jwx_kHim9eJ52Brj7jc8Uy6TsLu7Iw/s1600/col+4.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="180" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhmVt_tg7R8ZVlBTdOFAzt7nVs6teEj_tHXj_ud0u2f89JSX3RjArAlZypwIz-2wVCbSZQUP_GThAtDGZquAlDGyCvWrmq7_NTj9aTdu3dVGBfy2Jwx_kHim9eJ52Brj7jc8Uy6TsLu7Iw/s320/col+4.jpg" width="320" /></a>
<li><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">get folding : fold in half long ways.</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">open out</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">fold in half short ways - then fold that <i>fold </i>back to centre.</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">turn over -</span><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">then fold that </span><i style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">fold </i><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">back to centre.</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">open out</span></li>
</ul>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhF2gUoHh9gGTlPU5koQ724zKmx5d00vuOVLSORuECZd6aofy8a9eY0w82GP5FH8aB_Lso-LgLEJTVOUpONXA3wFWo9TRjA8eW3cmi7BQ1zIC-ojTlYypmHZGTQN3ss35xhCG5FrhGlGrc/s1600/col+6.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><br /></a></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgIHUUdRDe5Dp5HE3HUoVPQCOgPttpI5qDyq99yVPZ0sOdG5fiMV0si7gFAU9tMSLn4KVzwnwf8V9KM0z00NU8K_NVlsyWooyIOEVXWhrlvJFUgcUz-qvTp6fr7XjMMQDULqkJHTyrpjN0/s1600/col+7.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="180" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgIHUUdRDe5Dp5HE3HUoVPQCOgPttpI5qDyq99yVPZ0sOdG5fiMV0si7gFAU9tMSLn4KVzwnwf8V9KM0z00NU8K_NVlsyWooyIOEVXWhrlvJFUgcUz-qvTp6fr7XjMMQDULqkJHTyrpjN0/s320/col+7.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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<li><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">cut along the dotted line ( through the middle of the centre )</span></li>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgx0ofHhbYOodYyH51XycTK6-4PKGrZEbEx1DWwrhKpAzLZYpnF-YVzi3Z6P0wEP1_BVNyNM7c8Fb62aNmwpPhjQ2uNuIrc7C-RhDCnpu40DXu0-NBi6NRBmyzgzQ_kYER3THe27WC5Xhc/s1600/col+8.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="180" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgx0ofHhbYOodYyH51XycTK6-4PKGrZEbEx1DWwrhKpAzLZYpnF-YVzi3Z6P0wEP1_BVNyNM7c8Fb62aNmwpPhjQ2uNuIrc7C-RhDCnpu40DXu0-NBi6NRBmyzgzQ_kYER3THe27WC5Xhc/s320/col+8.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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<li><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">take the whole sheet and PINCH in the centre</span></li>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">it will be obvious where you should form the book! ( hopefully)</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">H is for HAPPINESS - that's the front.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">If you are unsure contact me </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Rebecca@shinecounselling.co.uk</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I'd love to see your finished books!</span></div>
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10toshinehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12263916978396798526noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1842368037976453572.post-49660259133131205962015-10-16T06:12:00.002-07:002015-10-16T06:12:42.865-07:00 My Mindful-Day Musings<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj9uWIbSVvz_xEFuViT0TIHxL5Hz5Xe8a7S9_b0C9tTy95YnZmHLW4DIA_She6Zfg_nzCnt9RYHwi18NlPCeZz98zLCU-HSYIV06z9UBqILk0UZKFmSTFCqMO-LD2AxZ3SXaErtIOhQCnc/s1600/Photo_2015-10-16_02-02-16_PM.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj9uWIbSVvz_xEFuViT0TIHxL5Hz5Xe8a7S9_b0C9tTy95YnZmHLW4DIA_She6Zfg_nzCnt9RYHwi18NlPCeZz98zLCU-HSYIV06z9UBqILk0UZKFmSTFCqMO-LD2AxZ3SXaErtIOhQCnc/s400/Photo_2015-10-16_02-02-16_PM.jpg" width="400" /></a></div>
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I didn’t wake with the intention of paying attention; it crept up on me as the sun shone into my bedroom showing up the cobwebs that accumulated above my head; the benefit of not doing thorough housework. As I made my way to the kitchen the wooden floor beneath my bare feet felt as if it had been buffed in the night, I noticed a light sheen and a certain softness. Then tea tasted fresher than usual. The colours brighter. Perhaps I should pay attention to this? And so I decided to see what it would be like to spend the day in heightened awareness, to practice mindfulness at all times.</div>
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It was a fairly ordinary Friday, chores to do, admin to catch up on; I wanted to make a cake but nothing that arduous. I was going to be alone for most of the day and I choose not to have any distractions from the radio or internet. It was warm enough to have the doors open and hang out the washing, a task that took a while longer than normal as the clothes smelt extra good, the plastic pegs more fun. As I noticed everything going on in my garden it was as if I had opened my eyes of the first time. In meditation class we are asked to come out of the practice with a sense of having no previous knowledge of the space we inhabit. By 11 am on my mindful day I was taking in information from my senses that I had never been aware of before. And in doing so time slowed down. The simplest task took on new meaning. Washing up was a sensuous experience of bubbles, and light ,and warmth, sweeping the floor a swishy dance with the broom, the touch of the magazines as I created orderly piles left me bemused that I hadn’t noticed how ‘paper’ felt. My mind, my feelings, my sense of edges and space became sharper on one level and totally blurred on another. </div>
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The afternoon got tripper. I decided to go out into the sunshine to the park, which took quite some time as I felt the need to keep stopping and smiling. I’m sure anyone watching me would have been convinced drugs were involved. By this point in the day I had lost any idea of ‘trying’ to be mindful I was living in the zone. Absolutely ‘out there’. I was experiencing a sensation of floating along whilst being in complete control of where I wished to focus my attention. London has some amazing outdoor spaces. On this particular autumn afternoon my mindset and the light combined to create a paradise. </div>
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I have read a little about ‘Bliss Fields’ and that is the nearest expression I can find to articulate how I felt as I lay on the grass and meditated. I could have stayed here for eternity. It all sounds so ‘New Age’ but I am a grounded urban reality dweller, all be it a Pollyanna-ish one. I was never one for drug taking, but if I could bottle this day I would, just so I could share it with anyone in need of an instant happy fix. </div>
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I meet my husband and daughter for a glass of wine in the early evening and aimed to explain to them my ‘enlightened’ day without sounding too whacky. That didn’t work of course….. they just think I’m odder than usual. And I did notice that although the first glass of wine tasted rich and delicious by the second glass the edge was wearing of my heightened awareness and I felt as if I was coming back down to earth. I felt quite like Alice in Wonderland; I had eaten the cake marked ‘HAPPY’ but discovered I could deflate back to ‘NORMAL’ with the help of a glass of red. Lesson being if you want to stop feeling blissfully happy knock the edge off joyful emotions with alcohol! </div>
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The next day it was business as usual. I didn’t feel any kind of come down, any remorse that I was no longer ‘open to the elements; life felt good, as it does most days with ups and downs, light and shade. </div>
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I’m not a writer; I don’t have the vocabulary to do justice to these feelings. I would almost rather not commit this day to words but I don’t want to forget. I did take photos all day to attempt to capture a visual story. I suspect it will be a while before I can capture the essence again. It has encouraged me to notice more every day. Mindfulness has become more integrated; I am just doing it, being it. I smile more, analyse less. The slightly out of mind and body way of being that day was a mini break that I think has changed my perception of the benefits of mindfulness. I achieve ten minutes of focused daily practise and will schedule a mindful day once a month, if you fancy giving it a try I’d love to hear your experiences.</div>
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10toshinehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12263916978396798526noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1842368037976453572.post-49124740071363813192015-09-25T04:42:00.000-07:002015-09-26T01:52:39.759-07:00Who do I want to be? SHINE Explores Choices.<div style="text-align: justify;">
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjBxX3V2dS4Tnohk5vjTl9uvcFWFATM7qH2OP_IGtB2CoN9xb6AgBeGMtVvKnwtgDavBWQNkakrU8UiQOpC41keaCb2_C_lrfoeX6448WMRKcv3udaK0xy1m3vxixtRjs9Xr61ltF4TjQw/s1600/20150904_141027.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjBxX3V2dS4Tnohk5vjTl9uvcFWFATM7qH2OP_IGtB2CoN9xb6AgBeGMtVvKnwtgDavBWQNkakrU8UiQOpC41keaCb2_C_lrfoeX6448WMRKcv3udaK0xy1m3vxixtRjs9Xr61ltF4TjQw/s320/20150904_141027.jpg" width="180" /></a>When I reflect on the choices I make daily in my life, I am reminded of one of my existential heroes, Sartre, who said that<i> ‘Man is nothing else but what he makes of himself’. </i>We <i>are</i> the choices we make; from simple decisions like whether to wear shoes or boots to complex ones which have more far reaching consequences, such as whom to marry. (Generally I have found both, that is footwear and marriage, equally intresting dilemmas!) We may make those choices in relation to the world round us, but we can decide on which window to open, where to cast our gaze and fundamentally what kind of person we wish to be. I can choose how to shape my future. I am not determined by my past. What motivates me is forward looking, I imagine how I want my day to be and my actions fit with this image. If I want my life to be fit, healthy and active I make the choices about what to eat and how much to exercise. And because I ‘own’ that choice, it is exciting and encourages me without feeling like a chore. Likewise if I make the choice to write a blog piece rather than take a walk in the sun I don’t feel I am denying myself because I have chosen where to direct my energies. I have learnt along the way what stimulates me most, what I value in life, and use that knowledge to influence the choices I make. I may not always take a route that others would choose but that’s part of the fun. It’s my way. When I take full responsibility for my actions I am excited by all the possible paths available to me. Yes there will always be things I can’t do but in focusing on the things I can my life is filled with immense joy, passion and purpose.</div>
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Shine counselling doesn’t offer us the option to sit around and ponder a cure for our ills, or wait until we are ‘actualised’; it asks us who we want to, be then inspires us to make the most of every day to become that person. To engage with life, to value and cherish every moment, every encounter along the way; to value our daily struggles and chaos with a smile on our face.</div>
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Shine counselling focuses on what is good with your life. The basic starting point is that we are all well-whole-balanced beings; we don’t need to be fixed. We have all the internal resources we will ever need but along the way they may have been mislaid or buried, we merely need to find a way to reconnect with them in order to be our most authentic healthy happy self.</div>
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The Shine ideology encourages a positive focus and emphasises positive emotions. It takes an essentially humanistic and existential viewpoint that what we experience is fundamental to who we are. The moment-to-moment flow of consciousness, feelings, perceptions and relations to the world around us is basic to our sense of self. It also stresses the choices we have in how we see our world and the responsibility we have for that position. It looks at the admirable strengths we all possess and how we can develop those attributes to increase our happiness and flourish. </div>
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Counselling in general involves change:</div>
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· Change in the way we <b>see</b> ourselves or our world</div>
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· Change in the way we <b>think</b> about ourselves or our world</div>
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· Change in the way we <b>feel</b> about ourselves or our world</div>
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· Change in the way we <b>behave</b></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjQQZcL04o-yShbBMKQm9FwLqySYxNhzCoAe5btA4Mkuz_JMDGjf-0tehzEDS57vz_lXu1hCQ-Feo_FpP5TWJPvU3wBO199W12wFdLQWWpaAv7Yup7nk976HYG9nnEKLcp9MednWAEtMj8/s1600/HELP.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjQQZcL04o-yShbBMKQm9FwLqySYxNhzCoAe5btA4Mkuz_JMDGjf-0tehzEDS57vz_lXu1hCQ-Feo_FpP5TWJPvU3wBO199W12wFdLQWWpaAv7Yup7nk976HYG9nnEKLcp9MednWAEtMj8/s320/HELP.jpg" width="307" /></a></div>
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Sometimes we need support when we make the decision to implement change, when a new client contacts me I ask "<i>How can I help?"</i></div>
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Clients come to counselling for varied reasons but often with a specific goal, a challenge or focus for change. They make the choice about what they want to change. Often they find that the process of discovery spreads out into other areas of their lives leading to new enriched meaning and purpose. Shine sessions act as a breath of fresh air, clearing out accumulated debris, making room for renewed energy and bringing an experience of the essence of ‘who I am’; a unique, distinctive being proactively engaging with the world, who can choose to stand up and SHINE.</div>
</span>10toshinehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12263916978396798526noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1842368037976453572.post-39787082294074657562015-09-15T11:43:00.004-07:002015-09-15T11:43:54.713-07:0010 Tips For A Stress-less LFW<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Whilst the world looks on at the glamorous coming and goings of Fashion Week, from New York to London, Paris to Milan, they don't see the high-pressure environments that those in the business are all too familiar with. A wild moment when a designer is pushed to breaking point…maybe that will make a tabloid headline. But the designers, buyers, show producers, PR agencies, journalists - the people who sell fashion - are experiencing stress beyond the daily grind of the banker or business owner; indeed they are responsible for an industry worth over £20bn. <br /><br />Fashion Week is notoriously exhausting…..Imran Amed from the website Business of Fashion coined the expression “fashion week fatigue”. The pace is relentless and it’s all too easy to get swept up in the round of shows, meetings and parties.<br /><br />The British Fashion Council runs The Model Zone as part of the Model Health Programme to ensure the well-being of models during London Fashion Week but what support is available for the designers and their teams, or the photographers, buyers and journalists who rush from show to show, often without eating anything, then drinking at after-parties late into the night – hardly a healthy way of doing things? All of this comes with the commercial pressure of balancing creativity with making large amounts of money; the whimsy of fashion, of getting it wrong, of trying to please everyone, keeping a brand in the spotlight and protecting others jobs as well as your own. It’s no surprise that fashion as an industry is as beset with mental health issues as any other high value business, and to compound this those on the inside are expected to look amazing and deal with the envy for the super shiny lifestyle that outsiders perceive goes along with the whole package. Fashion demands perfection; there is a sense that if fashion insiders do have mental health problems and fall short of the demands to create excellence each season, then those who succumb to the pressure will be scandalised or ostracized.<br /><br />So how can you protect your well-being this LFW whilst performing and having fun?<br /><br />1. Make a plan – set your intention each day – What do you actually have to achieve? What shows must you see? What appointments are absolutely essential? Map out those ‘MUSTS’ then figure in some slots in between for ‘WANTS’.<br /><br />2. Be reasonable about your time, there are only so many hours in the day, and even in the geographical boundaries of Soho getting around can be time consuming, factor in delays and late showings. <br /><br />3. And when things do run late, or the unexpected upsets the schedule, use the extra time to be mindful. Remember its only fashion!<br /><br />4. If the stress is building for others don’t react to their rudeness; stay calm in your centre, there is no need to personalise others bad behaviour.<br /><br />5. Prioritise a set space to take a walk outside, alone, taking deep breathes and just being. Find something to make you smile and allow that smile to spread down to the tips of your toes.<br /><br />6. Just because its fashion week your usual wellness rituals can still apply, take time for the gym, for yoga, for eating properly. And sleep. All of that may sound far-fetched but can be achieved London is buzzing with health and fitness. You will function much more efficiently if you take care of yourself.<br /><br />7. Preparing for emotional stress and having a contingency plan should you feel overwhelmed increases control; you are reinforcing strength and capability. (Rescue Remedy chewing gum and roll-on stress relief oil may be a good idea) <br /><br />8. If it all gets a little mad retire to the nearest loo and close your eyes for 5 minutes. Place your hands over your ears to block out the outside and think of the most beautiful place you can imagine, transport yourself to the beach of your dreams. Imagination is the life blood of this industry, use the skill to your advantage.<br /><br />9. Just as with any stress if you find yourself unable to cope don’t feel you need to deal with anxiety alone. Feeling a bit of extra strain during fashion week is one thing but an on-going sense of angst that causes you to ignore your emotions is damaging in the long term. Working in the exciting world of fashion doesn’t protect you from depression, be aware if it is all getting too much and find the support you need before it becomes a problem. Preventive mental health is as important as protecting your physical health.<br /><br />10. There is life after fashion week and it will all go back to normal in a month…until February that is.<br /></span><br /> </div>
10toshinehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12263916978396798526noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1842368037976453572.post-50479459030666746762015-09-01T11:27:00.000-07:002015-09-01T11:27:25.576-07:00Weddings & Special Events: How stay in the Calm Zone.<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> A wedding is a major life event and like so many areas in our lives can cause us to become stressed as well as excited.<br /><br />The stress hormones and those involved in excitement often feel (in our bodily responses) the same; sometimes we find it hard to differentiate whether a racing heart, sweaty palms and that churning in the stomach are reactions to fear or anticipation of pleasure.<br /><br />Mindfulness can help us to make an accurate evaluation of the physical feelings we are experiencing at such times. And focusing on the body allows the alarm moment to pass. We take a breath as we turn our attention internally; this moment is all we need to come back to the present. We don’t have to respond to the trigger and are able to let it fade away.<br /><br />They may be times in the build up to an important event, such as a wedding or a presentation deadline when the stress of getting to the goal seems overwhelming, even becoming so familiar it seems normal. We want to be able to utilise the positive energy of adrenalin without upsetting our balance and activating too much cortisol into the mix. Spending too much time in the ‘Stress Zone’ is exhausting and counter productive. <br /><br /><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Enjoy Life in the Calm Zone</span></div>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /><br />It helps to recognize your own ways of responding to stress by self-mapping. <br /></span><ul>
<li><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">What are your <b>thoughts</b> telling you? Are you ruminating on negative self talk? Are you rushing decisions without taking the time to think them through? Learn to recognize thoughts as temporary, fallible, and symptomatic.</span></li>
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<li><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">What is your <b>body</b> telling you? Are aches and pains a sign that you are not taking as much self care as you need? Is lack of sleep aggravating stress? Listen to the way your body feels with compassion, allow yourself the time for physical self care.</span></li>
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<li><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">How are you <b>behaving</b>? Are you withdrawing from others? Drinking too much? Returning to unhelpful habits? Eating less or more? Recognize behaviour that runs on autopilot as unsupportive.</span></li>
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<li><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">What are your <b>emotions</b> saying? Are tears a sign you are becoming overwhelmed? Are you snappy and irritable? Are you feeling restless and can’t settle ? do you have a sense of sadness? Do you feel you are in this alone? Create a non-reactive space in your head where you can observe your emotions, acknowledge them and then allow them to naturally fall away.</span></li>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">In the run up to a major event learn to say ‘No’ and give yourself real space to activate relaxation. Having a meditation practice, doing yoga, reading, walking, dancing, running, painting, whatever works for you to put you in the ‘Calm Zone’.<br /><br />Sometimes it helps to have the support of a therapist when we know that stressful times are on the horizon. We can use counselling and hypnotherapy as an adjunct to prevent the build-up of pre-event anxiety. One of the techniques commonly applied in hypnotherapy is rehearsing in our subconscious a future occasion, in this way we can preload our minds with a positive outcome and deal with possible negative ideas that would spoil the situation if left to irritate.<br /><br />Fostering a calm and tranquil attitude to big occasions will make the day flow and help all the good memories to embed in your mind……so that when you look forward to looking back you get a flood of feel good hormones all
over again.</span><br />
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10toshinehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12263916978396798526noreply@blogger.com0